I'm relatively new to this forum (post count's suggestions), and, indeed, I suppose like many are, am making an attempt to write a fantasy book. Firstly however, I'd be really glad to see what people think of Heline (note: the last e has an acute accent, can't get it on the forums...) and Tel-Anon. I'm not very good at direct explanations (C+ on essays told me this...), so, perhaps, a little passage... Anyways, don't fall asleep:
There are perhaps may oddities that one may notice when walking through the streets of Tel-Anon. The first may be that you could notice the multiculturism, the many various ethnic groups of Representative Species which was Tel-Anon. To the observant eye, this could lead to problems with clothing retailers, because, well, something that fit the Aves did not necesserily fit the Rattus norvegicus, and lead to complications such as a goblin wearing a suit intended for a lein, which had previously been designed by a gargoyle.
Then, the walker of Tel-Anon's streets might, like it happens in any modern city, come across the traffic, and not help but wonder what sort of ideas people had for transportation. The manticore, for example, was preferable to the horse, as not only did it gallop two times faster, but bystanders also got out of the way two times faster. Something to do with the face, they said, and the size. Or the flying carpet, for that matter, especially the living-room sized one, made a good source of income as it could be used as public conveyance around the city.
Supposedly there was also a speed limit somewhere, however, since there was no universal method of measuring speed in Tel-Anon, because what was 100 knots per hour for a donkey was quite different from 100 knots per hour for a griffon, making that speed limit “acceptable,” which usually varied on the mood of the driver.
There was of course the occasional biological abnormality walking through Tel-Anon's streets. The ghosts were particular ones. Their presence apparently had something to do with the brain's process' of shutting down, which, when it made some final calculations, could sometimes make a mistake and to Ressorvimo, namely the process for the brain to do the opposite of shutting down which is waking up, and leading to the complications of people attending their own funerals.
A figure plodded through the streets, with a calm comprehension of all this. It was also muddy, and it rained. Mud, in Tel-Anon, belonged to another of the city's machinations, peculiarly enough. Many interesting things were disposed of in Tel-Anon's streets, and after moisture was added, you had genuine Tel-Anonian mud. It could have probably been used as an offensive weapon in the correct hands, especially those which went through it, then later someone else's food.
But the rain... The rain was in fact the most interesting. It was the substance of creation after all. Someone whom our calm comprehender would consider dull would say: “Well, it’s because rain makes stuff, doesn’t it? Like, er, plants and things?”. Someone more sceptical would say, “Actually, when it has hit one of our rooves, then it's probably better of being used as rat poison; it doesn't create things.”
The truth was actually that the rain came from the process' of water evaporating from oceans, making clouds, and as the part-time poet with a limited vocabulary might say “pisses over thee”. This is being ignorant of the fact that the rain is water, and with the appropriate inquisitive mind, the next question would sound “but where's the originate water from? Had to come from somewhere, didn't it?”.
The plodding figure turned a corner, calmly avoided an onrushing cockatrice pulling a police carridge, and grinned to itself. The answer to the question was occult powers, or for preferance to simplify the classification, they were Demons.
To count them in a relative manner, then there would be ninety-two of them, and they were always very much interested in why a table, The Pereodic Table of Elements, had what intelligent life thought was their ninety-two names, all sounding awfully blant – the 1st Demon of Oxygen, the 2nd Demon of Hydrogen, and so forth.
They liked three dimensional things, as they seemed so nicely organised. So, the Demons decided, they would make some. It involved the peculiar rituals that in the most literal sense of speaking involved exchanging themselves amongst themselves, a physical impossbility, but when you are something existing in the fourth dimension, many of the other three dimensions' rules cease to exist.
There was a breif argument about where the three dimensional things were supposed to be placed, so Demons being Demons made a few planets, and thought that they looked perfectly applicable.
At first, these three dimensional things were much more simple, such as, rocks, which satisfied the Demons, despite their lack of lateral movement. However, one day they must have gone a bit haywire, and mixed a little too much of themselves with a little too much of the others, and this quite interesting thing was created - it was called life.
The lateral movement was indeed quite interesting, considering the fact that you were in one place at one time, with bits of you all in the same place as of opposed to the Demon's sections being in different areas of Space at different locations in Time. However there was something in the Immaterial Demon's notebook that wasn't supposed to happen. That life changed. So for the next few million years, the Demons sat down and watched. Accordingly, the life, out of all its changes, did something very unusal for the third dimension occupant - it thought. And that was indeed very entertaining.
This life used bits and pieces the Demons had created before to make new things, and this was interesting. For example, life would use wood, coming from trees, to make a pole, then attach a rock to the top. It made something called a tool – fascinating.
Using this tool, life’s machinations hit other things, making something similar, but it was more arched, and rather pointy at the end of each curve. This new tool could more effectively chip out bits of rock, which when put in a furnace (to the Demons this was a most complex tool that was made of combining coal, wood and alloys) made metal, which made even better tools that could hit other things more effectively.
The creativity of life didn’t stop there. It invented other, just as fascinating tools. A lever was an interesting one. You pulled it, and it made gears and machines (all made from even more tools) spin and turn, which worked something else. Life was using lots of little tools to create on big tool, and that big tool made other little tools work all at the same time. Absolutely incomprehensible to how it managed to do that, said the Demons.
But not always were the tools used for physical things. The quill, recently noticed by the 8th Demon, was used to do this thing called writing. Then, someone else would look at the symbols on the page, and be able to convey a message from them. Such ingenuity and originality of idea was beyond the Demons. Or, life talked. Demons belonged to a hive mind so the concept of not knowing what the other did was alien, life, apparently, did not, and with a little creativity, a talking match could be almost an effective replacement for a hive mind, but with the added bonus that the other didn't have to know everything, making the situation much more interesting.
(God that's long...)
Anyhow - feedback?