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Feedback On My Universe

While this is on my mind, I figured I'd ask for feedback on it.

THE UNIVERSE:
Everything is connected. Each planet, or Sphere, is both present in the physical world and the spirit world. For example, a person could travel billions of light years through space to move between Spheres, but the two Spheres would be connected in the spirit world. There are Spheres that exist solely in either world. Spheres that exist only in the physical world (such as Earth) have very limited psychic or magical energy. People born on these Spheres usually have no magical ability, though some can learn if they find themselves on another Sphere. Spheres that exist solely in the spirit world can take an illusion of physical form that constantly shifts. These Spheres are considered volatile, and are avoided by outsiders.

FATE:
Fate exists, but is unknowable, even to the Gods. It is considered a binding force between Order and Chaos. However, with enough practice and magical skill, some Gods can predict the course of fate and maneuver events to play out in their favor.

THE GODS:
The God of Order, who has no name, governs the physical world, law, and the relationships between all physical things in existence. The God of Chaos, who is sometimes called Void, governs the spirit world, where the physical does not exist and everything is constantly changing.

Numerous other Gods exist...

PRIMAL:
The least numerous type of God, Primal Gods govern life, death, and the elements for their Spheres. They can travel between Spheres, but doing so causes great imbalances that often result in the Sphere's destruction.

GREATER:
Greater Gods govern different species. There are Greater Gods for everything from mice to dragons. Greater Gods are capable of traveling between Spheres, and like to meddle in each others affairs. Each species may have multiple Greater Gods.

LESSER:
Lesser Gods govern places within their spheres. This includes mountain and forest gods. They are the most numerous type of God and often the weakest.

ASCENDANTS:
Ascendants are mortals who, through exposure to certain magical energies, have found themselves capable to moving between the physical and spirit worlds at will. This allows them to instantly travel between any Sphere. Ascendants can absorb the energy of other Ascendants and sometimes Gods. They tend to be violent and unpredictable. Most Ascendants are powerful mages.

THE STORY:
Fifteen years before the start of the story, an army of creatures from the spirit world invaded another Sphere. The resulting war lasted for only one year, but the loss of life was catastrophic. Somehow victorious, the surviving humans banded together to create a military dictatorship.

The main character, Jacobus Altyn, is the grandson of a famous war hero. He joins the military because he believes it is his calling, despite his grandfather's attempts to persuade him otherwise. He is assigned to a group of outcasts, members of other races and species who are shunned in this xenophobic society.

However, their lives are turned upside-down when Raiya du'Rashi, the hero who saved the Sphere and was posthumously (supposedly) named a Warrior Saint returns from her sojourn, very much alive. Unbeknownst to all but her closest confidants, she has a secret agenda that will turn Jacobus and his friends against each other in a war that will reshape the universe.
 
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Cool

/10char

Just kidding! It sounds pretty detailed and organized, and definitely seems like you have a good story to move forward. Some possible inconsistencies, or just things that need clarified a little more:

1. If fate can be predicted for gods to change things to their will, then how does fate exist?

2. Was Earth just an example sphere or does it exist, and if it does exist, is it Earth as we know it or some other Earth. Also, is the main world Earth or another world?

3. Is the protagonist not human or are humans those that are looked down on? Why is he in the outcast troupe if he is not an outcast? Was his grandfather a war hero in the war 15 years ago or in one before that?
 

Zireael

Troubadour
Do I understand that even Gods are bound by Fate? Or can they manipulate Fate so much that Fate stops being Fate?
 
Zero:

1. Fate is explained below.

2. Earth as we know it exists. However, it is not the main Sphere. There are four or five main Spheres where humans exist. Since humans are the species most connected to magical energies, the Spheres they live on tend to be the focal points of conflicts.

3. The protagonist is human for most of the story. Later on, he becomes an Ascendant. He's in the group of outcasts because the Army refused to let such a group exist unless there was at least one "good old boy" in it, and the guy who runs it thought that was a fair compromise. His grandfather was a hero in the big war 15 years ago. His father died in the same war and his mother left.

I suppose a good way to explain the fate paradox would be this:
Imagine fate as a series of parallel lines. Each line goes on forever and never meets the others, but sometimes another, perpendicular line will cross them. The perpendicular line is an event that is going to happen no matter what.

Let us say there's a meteor heading toward Sphere X. The meteor WILL hit, and nothing can change that. However, someone who is skilled enough to predict the course of fate can force some of the parallel lines to end or break. While this doesn't change the event, it changes the outcome of the event. So, if the meteor would have destroyed all life on the planet, it would instead hit in the ocean and cause a massive tsunami that, while devastating, would not destroy all life.

At this point, you're probably thinking "Isn't that just like predicting the outcome of anything?" The answer is yes. The issue is that to predict something with accuracy, you need to have some idea of how the system works. Since fate is mostly unknowable, the only way to figure out how the system works is through trial and error over hundreds of years. Even then you'll only get a vague idea of which events have to happen and which ones can be altered. To get to even that point, you need to either know if something major is going to happen or cause something yourself.

That's why Ascendants are so dangerous. You have powerful mages, who pretty much all hate each other, experimenting with a force they don't understand. It's like an amateur bomb-maker trying to figure out the best combination of chemicals by blowing up bombs until he finds out which one does more damage, except instead of blowing up bombs it might be sinking continents or murdering Gods.
 
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Sounds like you got something serious going on here. It's a really detailed and organized world you made, and I see a lot of potential in it for a good story, or at least something I would read (I have been known to be extremely picky in fantasy, and these kinds of stories are the one of the only ones I have the mentality to read).

I like the idea, though I find the presence of so many gods in one sphere would be prone to restricting to the development of the Sphere, and since they're sentient living beings, it would be plausible that they have personal agendas and ideas of their own, and let's say one wrongs another in some way or the other, it could result in an event that has serious environmental ramifications.
Or perhaps I'm being irrational here,and I'm possibly wrong or nitpicking.
 
That's actually the subject of one story I have set in this universe. The Greater God Aihu (of Dragons) attacked his rival Akartr (of Eagles) and banished him into my equivalent of Hell, one of the Spirit Worlds I described. The trick about this place is there's only one "door" and it can only be opened from the outside.

Said God comes back as a terribly misshapen and quite angry demon-thing and, upon finding out that Aihu is dead, exacts his revenge on his people.

The odd thing about this story is that Akartr loves humans, and the protagonist is about as misanthropic you can get.

So, I guess what I'm saying is that the Greater and Lesser Gods fight all the time. It's when they involve the Primal Gods that things start getting out of control. The Primal Gods are friendly and tend to get along with each other.
 
I would have thought Fate can exist on it's own, I mean people are in charge of their own fate, no one, not even a God should be able to change your fate. This world is slightly complicated for my brain, but, it's not as bad as the one we live in! Sign me up.
 
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