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Help with repetitive scenes!

taroufish

New Member
Hello everyone,

I'm looking for advice on a my novel I'm trying to write and I realise there's just too many chase scenes.

I have a wizard and his companion who have escaped from jail and they're being chased by two guards - so they're obviously being chased by them. And then a monster breaks loose and there's two separate scenes where it chases the MCs and then in a separate scene it chases after the two guards. They have to encounter this monster as it rampages through the cities but I feel like all this chasing around feels really repetitive (not to mention it's boring to write) so is there any other means of building tension?
 

Reaver

Staff
Moderator
Definitely. What if during the escape, either the wizard or his companion was seriously hurt, slowing them down? Lots of potential for tension and drama there.

Instead of running, they could try to find a place to hide while at the same time trying to find a way to heal the wounded companion.

Just a thought. Hope this helps.
 

Penpilot

Staff
Article Team
What's the purpose of these chase scenes? What are you trying to show the reader with them?

A fine chase can be fun and all, but if you're bored with them, there's probably nothing much interesting happening in them. SOOO, if that's the case, consider chopping them, or at least abbreviating them.

I mean fine the monster chases your main characters, but who cares if it chases the guards? If you absolutely must show the guards being chased, just show the monster going after them, them running, then cut to the point where they get away. That could be done in a few paragraphs. The same could be done for the chase with the main characters, if it's boring.

There's nothing wrong with simply writing something like this. "They ran from the monster. They ran and they ran until out of breath, then they ran some more. And slowly, the monster fell behind further and further until it was gone. They'd gotten away."

A story is life with the boring bits left out. So leave out the boring bits.
 

taroufish

New Member
Instead of running, they could try to find a place to hide while at the same time trying to find a way to heal the wounded companion.

This is a great idea! And it would definitely raise the stakes too. I might try something like that.

What's the purpose of these chase scenes? What are you trying to show the reader with them?

A fine chase can be fun and all, but if you're bored with them, there's probably nothing much interesting happening in them. SOOO, if that's the case, consider chopping them, or at least abbreviating them.

I mean fine the monster chases your main characters, but who cares if it chases the guards? If you absolutely must show the guards being chased, just show the monster going after them, them running, then cut to the point where they get away. That could be done in a few paragraphs. The same could be done for the chase with the main characters, if it's boring.

There's nothing wrong with simply writing something like this. "They ran from the monster. They ran and they ran until out of breath, then they ran some more. And slowly, the monster fell behind further and further until it was gone. They'd gotten away."

A story is life with the boring bits left out. So leave out the boring bits.

You make a strong point: it's probably not necessary to show the WHOLE chase scene with those guards, but it's necessary in part because it:

1. introduces other characters
2. it demonstrates that the monster has a weakness
3. explains how the monster moves from place to place (through a kind of teleportation)
4. the guards are deuteragonists as well as antagonists so everything they do is almost as important as the MC

So I guess the real question I should be asking is: how do I make chase scenes more exciting and not seem repetitive? I think you might be right - cutting down the actual "chasing" element would be a start since it feels very same-y to write.
 

ThinkerX

Myth Weaver
Chase scene through a city? Thing about cities is they tend to have lots of people, lots of things going on. Crowded markets. That weird fellow who is constantly predicting the end of the world. The fanatic salesman determined to sell your MC something if its the last thing he does. The burly smith or laborer type who attempts to stop said monster with a sledgehammer or some such. Panicked people trying to board a ship or some such out of the city. And so on.
 

Penpilot

Staff
Article Team
So I guess the real question I should be asking is: how do I make chase scenes more exciting and not seem repetitive? I think you might be right - cutting down the actual "chasing" element would be a start since it feels very same-y to write.

Going by the limited info, I think this would be the approach I'd take. I'd combine all the chases into one scene and one chase. Now this leaves us with the problem of POV. I could deal with that in one of three ways. First, I could alternate sections between the POVs of the wizard and the guards. Second, I could take the POV of the monster. OR I could take the POV of the wizard's companion.

Now how would I combine everything into one chase? Everything unfolds basically the same, but could I'd alternating between wizard and guard POVs, spending time with both parties as the monster chases the wizard then the guards and then wizard again and then guards, etc. The change in POVs can take place when the monster switches who they're chasing.

Now this could be annoying jumping from one to the other, so that could be addressed by taking the POV of the monster as it chases the wizard then the guards and then the wizard and the guards again.

Now this can be tricky because, well, you might not want to give too much away with the monster, and getting into the head of the monster may not be the direction you want to go.

Which leaves us with taking the POV of the companion. How does this help? Have the companion run with the wizard,

So with the companion as the POV, you can have the companion running with the wizard. They get cornered by the guards, but then the monster attacks. They all scatter. The companion runs with the wizard but then gets separated as the monster gives chase to them.

Then the companion ends up running into the guards. They're about to take him into custody when the monster shows up and the guards and the companion start running together. With this approach, you can move the companion from wizard to guards as you wish and have the monster chasing them all without breaking scene.

It's all just one big chase with them all trying to get away. The wizard and companion are trying to get away from the guards and the monster and the guards are trying to get away from the monster, and maybe still trying to apprehend the wizard and companion.

Sorry this is really a lot clearer in my head. But hopefully you can get something out of this.
 

K.S. Crooks

Maester
Have various goals for the characters pursuing and being pursued? You can also have the focus be their destination, the obstacle and danger, the thought process of the characters. In The Da Vinci Code Robert Langdon and Sophie spend many instances being chased. What keeps it exciting is the different people doing the pursuit, the various modes of transportation, and most importantly Robert and Sophie are at the same time trying to achieve their own goals. They're not simple on the run to save their own life. Make it matter that your characters escape, more than for them to still be alive.
 
I would suggest varying the settings. Different settings have different dangers and obstacles as well as different atmospheres, and can change a lot about a scene. Maybe one chase scene takes place in a crowded, busy street in daylight, another takes place at night across the rooftops, or at the outskirts of the city in an abandoned, dilapidated district.

I would also second the person who said there should be an injury.
 

Heliotrope

Staff
Article Team
I agree with everyone here, and have some other suggestions to add:

If the goal of the scene is mainly to show the monster (how it moves etc) and to introduce the guards, then I would have just the guards being chased, and I would have the MC doing something else entirely, like trying to stealthily scale the side of a turret or something.

Tension does not have to just be chase and fight scenes. Have the monster chase the guards, but then have the MC escape out a window, or into a storm drain, or into some caves, and give them a separate set of challenges, such as:
- scaling a high wall in the middle of a rain or snow storm
- navigating a tunnel system under the dungeon
- navigating the sewer or water system under the dungeon (possibility of drowning there).

Etc. This way it would break up the scenes for the reader, giving a new setting and enhancing the POV so it isn't confusing.

How you can heighten the tension in a chase scene:

Think of the worst possible thing that could happen at that time.
- Maybe they lose their weapon
- they trip
- they get trapped at a dead end
- they get injured and have to hide
- They knock over a lantern and the castle lights on fire

Brainstorm a list.

As far as the rest of the story, are chase scenes and fight scenes the only scenes you have for raising tension? Remember that tension for the reader does not come from the action but from mystery. Tension comes from raising a question in the reader's head, such as "will they ever find the answer? Will they ever get the magical amulet? Will the couple ever get together? Will they ever get to the bottom of the mystery? What was that mysterious noise? Who was the mysterious masked man? Etc." Raising questions is what causes the reader to read on, not constant action. If you are concerned about tension, you may want to think about or list what sorts of questions you want the reader to have when the chapter is over.
 

taroufish

New Member
Thank you everyone for all of your advice! It's been extremely helpful in helping me write these scenes. I realise that I didn't make it clear at all that these two scenes are set in entirely different places at different times (monster attacks MC and then is teleported to another city where it attacks the guards) but since it reoccurs later with all four characters anyway, all of your advice on how to split up and pace the scene has been really useful! So thank you!

Going by the limited info, I think this would be the approach I'd take. I'd combine all the chases into one scene and one chase. Now this leaves us with the problem of POV. I could deal with that in one of three ways. First, I could alternate sections between the POVs of the wizard and the guards. Second, I could take the POV of the monster. OR I could take the POV of the wizard's companion.

This is definitely something I have taken into consideration as the first introduction of the monster is essentially from its POV. But hearing this from someone else definitely makes me feel validated in this approach - not to mention it gives me plenty of ideas for the final scene with all of the characters and the monster. So thank you!

@ThinkerX Those are some great suggestions! It also made me realise that when the guards are being chased, I hadn't written about any of the crowd running with them so they were essentially running alone... which in such a big city, is totally weird. LOL So thank you.

Have various goals for the characters pursuing and being pursued? You can also have the focus be their destination, the obstacle and danger, the thought process of the characters.

As far as the rest of the story, are chase scenes and fight scenes the only scenes you have for raising tension? Remember that tension for the reader does not come from the action but from mystery. Tension comes from raising a question in the reader's head, such as "will they ever find the answer? Will they ever get the magical amulet? Will the couple ever get together? Will they ever get to the bottom of the mystery? What was that mysterious noise? Who was the mysterious masked man? Etc." Raising questions is what causes the reader to read on, not constant action. If you are concerned about tension, you may want to think about or list what sorts of questions you want the reader to have when the chapter is over.

Another thing I didn't even think about! Why are these people running in the first place and where are they running to? So what if they die? What's really at stake here? Thank you both for helping me readjust my focus for the scene. I have removed some of the exposition that takes place between the guards and replaced it with dialogue that now just alludes to one of them knowing more that she lets on - while the other character (and hopefully the reader) now needs them to escape if they are ever to discover the truth. Hopefully it'll heighten the tension of the scene and make the monster more of a mystery.

And thank you again to everyone for your suggestions on how to add excitement and drama to chase scenes. I'm definitely thinking either injury or trapped at a dead end, or some combination of the two.
 
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