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First Person POV woes

Trick

Auror
Having posted one thread and gotten help so quickly I find another question I'm struggling with might need airing out.

I'm writing a dark, semi-urban fantasy in first person. It mainly consists of the protagonist recounting his life story but is interspersed with chapters that are the memoirs of a secondary character who was the unwilling personal servant to the antagonist.

My question is this: I want to explain the antagonist's background thoroughly enough to show the 'why' behind his behaviour and avoid the "he's just pure evil" scenario but I can't find a way to reveal it through the personal servant's memoirs without an infodump feel.

Edit: The personal servant character did not meet the antagonist until he reached his current state of evil so he knows nothing of his past.

I am very committed to the FP POV but I am not opposed to suggestions on how to add 3rd person POV sections without losing continuity.

Any thoughts?
 
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Ireth

Myth Weaver
What's your villain's motivation? Are there any specific actions he/she takes which would make them clear, aside from the obvious evil deeds? If your villain is a woman who wants the respect of her absent mother (for example), she might rant and rave about her deeds to a picture of said mother, to the effect of "Look at what I've accomplished! Is it good enough for you?", or something along those lines. Your servant character, who may very well overhear these rants, may be used to a particular pattern or flavor in them, and take note when the villain suddenly or subtly changes her words to a degree.

Just my two cents' worth. Feel free to tweak that idea to suit your particular villain and his/her mindset. ^^
 

Trick

Auror
(hopefully this helps)

The villain's motivation is relatively simple. He was a powerful man politically but lost favor and was exiled, which was supposed to be a vaguely disguised death sentence. Not only did he survive but ended up living for over a hundred years due to a magic he discovered and came to master. The power itself has evil implications and it darkened him further until he became dead set on vengeance against his homeland. He returns and the evil ensues.

(Ireth, I really like the ranting idea - I even have a character he could be ranting to while the servant overhears. I do want to avoid too much overheard info being of a personal nature though, because it doesn't suit the character to reveal anything too private on purpose.)
 

Steerpike

Felis amatus
Moderator
There's no reason you can't switch between a first person POV and a third person POV for a different character. There are examples of this on the book shelves. I'd handle it the same as any other POV shift. I don't the fact that it goes between first and third, or between protagonist and antagonist, makes much difference in that regard.
 

Trick

Auror
Steerpike,

I tend to agree but I hear a lot of complaints about switching from 1st to 3rd. I don't particularly agree with them but I worry that maybe I'll do it poorly and confuse people. The Name of the Wind does it well in my opinion but I'm not sure how to organize my story so that I can pull it off.
 

Steerpike

Felis amatus
Moderator
An urban fantasy series that does it (though it is a teen series) is House of Night, by P.C. and Kristin Cast. I don't think the fact that it is first v. third changes how you organize it. You want to organize the story so that any POV change makes sense in the narrative and maintains the timeline as you want it. Does the organization of the story itself change if you're switching from first to third instead of from third to third? I can't see why it would.

As for complaints, you're going to get those from people, regardless. Some people dislike any POV shift, and some people dislike either first or third. I think it is worth sticking with your vision of the story, even though there are some who don't like the idea of it.
 

ThinkerX

Myth Weaver
Two memoirs:

The first is by your servant character.

The second is written by the antagonist himself: his early years in his own words. A journal, but one written with fire and anger. Have him denounce the 'weaklings' who sent him into exile. Have him express his frustrations at living in exile. The hint of promise when he starts learning this magic. Then the journal breaks off because it gets stolen in such a way the Antagonists believes it destroyed (maybe during a fire, flood, or riot).

Hence, the switch to the servants tale.
 

Trick

Auror
I guess the issue for me with switching back and forth between 1st and 3rd is that first feels so personal and third silently introduces a narrator who is unknown. It can be jarring. That's the only reason I would want a structure for it. I don't want readers thinking, "who's telling this part of the story?"
 

Trick

Auror
I've considered a memoir from the antagonist POV. Since his transition to evil happened so long before the current story, might it work to have the servant character find such a journal and relate it in his own memoirs? Or does that seem cheap?
 

A. E. Lowan

Forum Mom
Leadership
Edit: The personal servant character did not meet the antagonist until he reached his current state of evil so he knows nothing of his past.

My question is, if the servant knows nothing of the antagonist's past, how are you thinking about having him reveal his background? Is the servant speculating based on observations? You say you don't want him to have eave-dropped too much, but remember that a good servant is invisible - he may have seen a great deal his master was not aware of. So, I guess my question is, how reliable a narrator can this servant be? Personally, I like unreliable narrators, but that does not sound like what you're shooting for here.
 

Trick

Auror
Good servants are usually very discreet but it's basically impossible in this situation for him to be within earshot of the antagonist without being noticed (because of the magic he possesses).

Largely, the servant relays opinions and interactions with the antagonist in his memoirs. He knows his recent past (his rise to power etc.) but not his actual age or his history before he returned to his homeland. Plus, the story builds somewhat like a mystery and I want to have a good reveal of the truth. Just kind of ended up in a corner.
 

ThinkerX

Myth Weaver
Hmmm...frame it as a sort of literary detective tale then:

The protagonist, the one relating the story, has some initial serious misconceptions about just who his foe was. All he has to go on is the servants memoirs (flawed, as you've pointed out), and maybe a couple of quickie notes in the official record, which don't say much. Then he follows a clue, and finds his antagonists own journal giving his version of what happened, which he then has to reconcile with his own beliefs. 'But this account runs contrary to everything I know!' 'My God, the magistrate would never issue a sentence like that...would he?' and so on and so forth.
 

Trick

Auror
That's not perfectly in line with the story timeline but the idea is great! I could easily have the servant overhear just enough to get curious and start researching clue by clue, ultimately discovering how the antagonist came to be evil...

Thank you!
 

Trick

Auror
Had an idea to put past everyone. Because the servant character can't sneak around the antagonist without being seen/heard I thought about giving the bad guy night terrors and having him talk in his sleep, thus revealing bits of his history. Opinions?
 

ThinkerX

Myth Weaver
Had an idea to put past everyone. Because the servant character can't sneak around the antagonist without being seen/heard I thought about giving the bad guy night terrors and having him talk in his sleep, thus revealing bits of his history. Opinions?

I deem it unlikely the Antagonist would let the Servant anywhere nearby when he's sleeping.

However, Servants do tend to get treated as 'mobile furniture' by their masters. The best servants come to anticipate their masters desires. Hence, your servant could easily be standing close at hand when the Antagonist lets something interesting slip, say an offhand remark as to how that idiot he just dealt with reminds him of another idiot from his youth in such and such a town. Likewise, a clever servant (which yours must be) could easily put a whole slew of things together from the nature of the orders the Antagonist orders him to perform (take this note to so and so, and let her know this pertains to X event).

Best course would be to have the Servant stumble on some fragmentary notes or failed journal of the Antagonists early life in the course of his duties, which he then fills in the blanks with his own recollections. (The master threw these papers into the fire, and I found them whilst cleaning the fireplace.)
 

Trick

Auror
I deem it unlikely the Antagonist would let the Servant anywhere nearby when he's sleeping.
... Best course would be to have the Servant stumble on some fragmentary notes or failed journal of the Antagonists early life in the course of his duties, which he then fills in the blanks with his own recollections. (The master threw these papers into the fire, and I found them whilst cleaning the fireplace.)

The servant goes by his master's quarters every evening and that is the only scenario I can imagine him overhearing the night terrors/talking in his sleep that could lead somewhere.

I like the fragmentary journal idea. There wouldn't exactly be fireplaces but I could definitely make a situation where he'd be disposing of documents that would work equally well. Thanks for the input!
 
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