# Fantasy Writer's Quiz



## TheokinsJ (Mar 22, 2013)

Below is a link I thought many people would find useful, please understand that this is merely someone's opinion and the things they say should not put you off writing your story, it's just a quiz that determines how chlichÃ© stories can be, or how unrealistic. In the quiz, there are seventy or so questions, the idea is to *honestly *say "no" to as many questions as you can, however I must admit that I myself found that I said "Yes" to almost half a dozen of them. Saying yes to a couple of them doesn't mean that your work is clichÃ©, but should you find that you have answered a good amount incorrectly then maybe you might need to do some thinking. Still it's your story, you can write whatever you want, don't let this phase you. I just thought it would be a good source for people to look at to see how original their story is.

The Fantasy Novelist's Exam


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## Ghost (Mar 22, 2013)

Another thread for your perusal.


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## TheokinsJ (Mar 22, 2013)

lol, had no idea it had been done before


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## The Unseemly (Mar 24, 2013)

Lovely! I'm the one for scamming unoriginal concepts (the _Lord of the Rings rip off_), and turning them into cliches. Much appreciated.

EDIT: Apologies. On a more serious note: sometimes these questions are a bit inappropriate. Certainly, no-one likes a Lord of the Rings rip off, because that just gets boring. However, there are certain questions which I disliked, mainly because it can (but most definitely doesn't have to) simplify the story, and allow readers to relate with something they understand well.


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## Mockingjay Ignis (Mar 24, 2013)

TheokinsJ said:


> Below is a link I thought many people would find useful, please understand that this is merely someone's opinion and the things they say should not put you off writing your story, it's just a quiz that determines how chlichÃ© stories can be, or how unrealistic. In the quiz, there are seventy or so questions, the idea is to *honestly *say "no" to as many questions as you can, however I must admit that I myself found that I said "Yes" to almost half a dozen of them. Saying yes to a couple of them doesn't mean that your work is clichÃ©, but should you find that you have answered a good amount incorrectly then maybe you might need to do some thinking. Still it's your story, you can write whatever you want, don't let this phase you. I just thought it would be a good source for people to look at to see how original their story is.
> 
> The Fantasy Novelist's Exam



I have already came across this before , luckily, almost all of them were not in my fantasy project. Not to shabby for me.


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## Filk (Mar 25, 2013)

Number 53 made me laugh. It's a pretty funny list overall.


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## teacup (Mar 26, 2013)

Huh. I only had like 3 or 4 at a push. A couple of "kind of" ones too that I wouldn't say fit enough.


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## glutton (Mar 26, 2013)

My hopefully amusing reactions -

15 - she worries sometimes because she's horribly scarred...
19 - no she's good with both, she needs to cook on the road for herself after all...
29 - an 8-9 book series actually.
44 - no, but I imagine the heroine is over Level 20 by the time she's 17...
50 - yes.
53 - not in the more serious books but I have used the term in a parody...
56 - any of the elite warriors could EASILY do this, but haven't done it specifically.
58 - any of the elite warriors could EASILY do this, but haven't done it specifically.
59 - of course.
60 - real swords don't. My heroine's weighs 30 pounds though.
63 - no, she can eat hits from either like candy.
64 - a regular man, no. The elites can have a dozen arrows sticking out of them and be only slightly bothered though.
73 - sort of.


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## PlotHolio (Mar 27, 2013)

I posted a similar thing. It's good as a guideline and it can be fun to take, but you shouldn't let it shape your story.
Here are some choice answers.

Does your novel contain a character that is really a god in disguise?
Several, and they don't all like each other.

Is the king of your world a kindly king duped by an evil magician?
He's a meh king who dies in the first chapter.

Is any character in your novel best described as "a dour dwarf"?
The only dwarf in my novel is Grimly of Moiria, and he's not dour.

How about "a half-elf torn between his human and elven heritage"?
I actively work to keep Tanis Half-Baked out of my business.

Is your novel thicker than a New York City phone book?
I've never seen one.

Is your name Robert Jordan and you lied like a dog to get this far?
Hello? I'm not Robert Jordan.
I'm James Rigney. Harriet put me in cryo-stasis until last December. My death was a lie.

Do you see nothing wrong with having two characters from the same small isolated village being named "Tim Umber" and "Belthusalanthalus al'Grinsok"?
You know Tim and Belthie?

Have you done up game statistics for all of your main characters in your favorite RPG?
My main character is a Level 19 Human Shaman.

Do you think horses can gallop all day long without rest?
Yes, because my horses are all magical!

Does anybody in your novel ever stab anybody with a scimitar?
No, simply because they don't use scimitars. Have you seen a scimitar? They're meant for slicing, but they're still swords.







Does a large portion of the humor in your novel consist of puns?
I like puns...

Do you really think it frequently takes more than one arrow in the chest to kill a man?
Depending on the kind of bow, yes. Shortbow from medium range? Dead. Long range? Plink.

Do you not realize it takes hours to make a good stew, making it a poor choice for an "on the road" meal?
Unless you bring it with you and warm it up. Some of these questions are pretty short-sighted. Either that, or they underestimate how much people like stew.

Is your book basically a rip-off of The Lord of the Rings?
Yes.

Read that question again and answer truthfully.
No.


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## Chilari (Mar 27, 2013)

As with a great many things, I think this exam should be taken with a fairly large pinch of salt. I don't think saying yes to any one question means your novel should be discarded. You've got to be careful with cliches. Actively avoiding them can be as damaging to a story as deliberately including them if you don't know what you're doing. I've written about this in my blog already: How to deal with cliches in fiction. But the gist is, be aware of cliches, consider how they (like any other element you include in your story) will impact upon other characters and events. Don't just use them to fill a gap and assume the reader will just go along with it.

Having said that, I do see where the exam's creators are coming from, but they don't explain or encourage readers to examine the underlying problems; use of these cliches in fantasy is not the disease, they're the symptoms. And in the same way sneezing can be a symptom of a cold or it could just be a sneeze, using cliches doesn't necessarily mean the story is bad. Using a lot is probably not a good sign though.


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## SeverinR (Mar 27, 2013)

PlotHolio said:


> Does anybody in your novel ever stab anybody with a scimitar?
> No, simply because they don't use scimitars. Have you seen a scimitar? They're meant for slicing, but they're still swords.
> 
> 
> ...


That pointy thing on the end will stab nicely, it will not penetrate metal armor though without a good chance of breaking off.  It is a slashing weapon, but can stab too.

Stew: I believe when traveling, you kept the stew and added water and other items found along the road to keep it from running out, it would change the flavor(mixing of flavors and probably some mold or dust seasoning, plus the new additives, maybe even some fermenting.)  Dried meat probably got old very quickly.  Also the cooks could use breaks to cut up contents and drop them in the pot as they went. So the hour long stew would be divided over several breaks during the day. (remember horses/livestock need rest breaks during the day.)


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## Nihal (Mar 27, 2013)

I hope this test is a warning in form of joke, but I have this impression that who made it is just strongly biased and grumpy.

At the beginning: _"Answering "yes" to any one question results in failure and means that the prospective novel should be abandoned at once."_

Hahaha! While these tests are good to set off some flags and make you rethink seriously some aspects of your creation you should by no means follow it as a sacred set of rules.

Now, excuse me while I'm going to murder all my sisters because they have names composed of more than 3 syllables and accordingly to the number 37 it's absurd. =P


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## Zero Angel (Mar 27, 2013)

That's funny about the scimitars. I have an elementalist stab someone with a scimitar (from behind with no armor), to which the fighter is like, "Uhh, you know that's not designed for stabbing, right?"


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## druidofwinter (Mar 30, 2013)

lol! that was great! though i must admit in answered "yes" to four of them.
thanks for posting that


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## Meyer (Mar 31, 2013)

I'm bored and avoiding work so I answered them all.  



Spoiler



The Exam
1.	Does nothing happen in the first fifty pages?  Nope.
2.	Is your main character a young farmhand with mysterious parentage? No main character.
3.	Is your main character the heir to the throne but doesn't know it?  N/A
4.	Is your story about a young character who comes of age, gains great power, and defeats the supreme badguy?  No major characters under mid twenties actually.
5.	Is your story about a quest for a magical artifact that will save the world? Nope.
6.	How about one that will destroy it?  Nope.
7.	Does your story revolve around an ancient prophecy about "The One" who will save the world and everybody and all the forces of good?  There is a ‘chosen one’ prophecy, but it is a subversion of the concept.
8.	Does your novel contain a character whose sole purpose is to show up at random plot points and dispense information?  No.
9.	Does your novel contain a character that is really a god in disguise?  Maybe.  Haven’t decided on that point yet.
10.	Is the evil supreme badguy secretly the father of your main character?  Nope.
11.	Is the king of your world a kindly king duped by an evil magician?  No.
12.	Does "a forgetful wizard" describe any of the characters in your novel?  No.
13.	How about "a powerful but slow and kind-hearted warrior"?  No.
14.	How about "a wise, mystical sage who refuses to give away plot details for his own personal, mysterious reasons"?  Sort of, but not entirely.
15.	Do the female characters in your novel spend a lot of time worrying about how they look, especially when the male main character is around?  No, they’re too busy racking up body counts in the hundreds.
16.	Do any of your female characters exist solely to be captured and rescued?  No.
17.	Do any of your female characters exist solely to embody feminist ideals?  No.
18.	Would "a clumsy cooking wench more comfortable with a frying pan than a sword" aptly describe any of your female characters?  No.
19.	Would "a fearless warrioress more comfortable with a sword than a frying pan" aptly describe any of your female characters?  Yes.
20.	Is any character in your novel best described as "a dour dwarf"?  No.
21.	How about "a half-elf torn between his human and elven heritage"?  No.
22.	Did you make the elves and the dwarves great friends, just to be different?  No dwarves.
23.	Does everybody under four feet tall exist solely for comic relief?  No.
24.	Do you think that the only two uses for ships are fishing and piracy?  Military transportation, commerce, passenger ships, warships, defense pickets, blockades, etc.
25.	Do you not know when the hay baler was invented?  Got me there.
26.	Did you draw a map for your novel which includes places named things like "The Blasted Lands" or "The Forest of Fear" or "The Desert of Desolation" or absolutely anything "of Doom"?  Closest would be ‘The Wastes’.
27.	Does your novel contain a prologue that is impossible to understand until you've read the entire book, if even then?  No prologue.
28.	Is this the first book in a planned trilogy?  Hope not.
29.	How about a quintet or a decalogue?  See above.
30.	Is your novel thicker than a New York City phone book?  Hope not.
31.	Did absolutely nothing happen in the previous book you wrote, yet you figure you're still many sequels away from finishing your "story"?  Hopefully I can resolve the story in under 500,000 words.
32.	Are you writing prequels to your as-yet-unfinished series of books?  That’d be dumb.
33.	Is your name Robert Jordan and you lied like a dog to get this far?  Not even the same initials.
34.	Is your novel based on the adventures of your role-playing group?  Never Rped.
35.	Does your novel contain characters transported from the real world to a fantasy realm?  Hell no.
36.	Do any of your main characters have apostrophes or dashes in their names?  Yes…I did that.  /hangs head in shame
37.	Do any of your main characters have names longer than three syllables?  I don’t think so.
38.	Do you see nothing wrong with having two characters from the same small isolated village being named "Tim Umber" and "Belthusalanthalus al'Grinsok"?  Would be difficult to justify.
39.	Does your novel contain orcs, elves, dwarves, or halflings?  Orcs and Elves only.
40.	How about "orken" or "dwerrows"?  Hell no.
41.	Do you have a race prefixed by "half-"?  Nope.
42.	At any point in your novel, do the main characters take a shortcut through ancient dwarven mines?  No dwarves to make mines.
43.	Do you write your battle scenes by playing them out in your favorite RPG?  What the feth?
44.	Have you done up game statistics for all of your main characters in your favorite RPG?  No, but I did make profiles for them in Warhammer.  LMAO
45.	Are you writing a work-for-hire for Wizards of the Coast? Nope.
46.	Do inns in your book exist solely so your main characters can have brawls?  No.
47.	Do you think you know how feudalism worked but really don't?  Is Feudalism even real?
48.	Do your characters spend an inordinate amount of time journeying from place to place?  Not really…I hope…
49.	Could one of your main characters tell the other characters something that would really help them in their quest but refuses to do so just so it won't break the plot?  Nope
50.	Do any of the magic users in your novel cast spells easily identifiable as "fireball" or "lightning bolt"?  Perhaps
51.	Do you ever use the term "mana" in your novel?  No
52.	Do you ever use the term "plate mail" in your novel?  Maybe
53.	Heaven help you, do you ever use the term "hit points" in your novel?  lol
54.	Do you not realize how much gold actually weighs?   I’d research it
55.	Do you think horses can gallop all day long without rest?  Hell no.  I actually have a scene written that describes a communications system where horses are switched out every 40-50 miles for fresh ones at various stips.
56.	Does anybody in your novel fight for two hours straight in full plate armor, then ride a horse for four hours, then delicately make love to a willing barmaid all in the same day?  Hell no
57.	Does your main character have a magic axe, hammer, spear, or other weapon that returns to him when he throws it?  No magic weapons
58.	Does anybody in your novel ever stab anybody with a scimitar?  If they were dumb 
59.	Does anybody in your novel stab anybody straight through plate armor?  Maybe with a magic weapon *winks*
60.	Do you think swords weigh ten pounds or more? [info]  Maybe if it was a ten foot long sword
61.	Does your hero fall in love with an unattainable woman, whom he later attains?  Nope
62.	Does a large portion of the humor in your novel consist of puns?  I dislike puns
63.	Is your hero able to withstand multiple blows from the fantasy equivalent of a ten pound sledge but is still threatened by a small woman with a dagger?  No
64.	Do you really think it frequently takes more than one arrow in the chest to kill a man?  Arrows hurt
65.	Do you not realize it takes hours to make a good stew, making it a poor choice for an "on the road" meal?  On the road meal would be salted meat and dry bread at best
66.	Do you have nomadic barbarians living on the tundra and consuming barrels and barrels of mead?  Nope
67.	Do you think that "mead" is just a fancy name for "beer"?  No
68.	Does your story involve a number of different races, each of which has exactly one country, one ruler, and one religion?  Yes and no
69.	Is the best organized and most numerous group of people in your world the thieves' guild?  No Thieves’ Guild
70.	Does your main villain punish insignificant mistakes with death?  Maybe for the luls…no not serious about that
71.	Is your story about a crack team of warriors that take along a bard who is useless in a fight, though he plays a mean lute?  I really hate bards
72.	Is "common" the official language of your world?  Got me there damn it…I’ll have to fix that
73.	Is the countryside in your novel littered with tombs and gravesites filled with ancient magical loot that nobody thought to steal centuries before?  No magical loot
74.	Is your book basically a rip-off of The Lord of the Rings?  I hope not
75.	Read that question again and answer truthfully.  LotR is a big inspiration, but any similarities should be minimal and coincidental


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## glutton (Apr 1, 2013)

Meyer said:


> On the road meal would be salted meat and dry bread at best



Or animals you catch.


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## Meyer (Apr 1, 2013)

Point.  I will counter that hunting can be very unreliable though.


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## glutton (Apr 2, 2013)

True, it would help if you can shoot down birds consistently unless there aren't many birds around.


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## SeverinR (Apr 2, 2013)

Zero Angel said:


> That's funny about the scimitars. I have an elementalist stab someone with a scimitar (from behind with no armor), to which the fighter is like, "Uhh, you know that's not designed for stabbing, right?"



A steak knife isn't meant as an offensive weapon, but it works. Just like the tip of a scimitar could stab.
I agree a  scimitar is a slasher weapon, but if it has a pointy tip, it can stab.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SWvsHorqldM
Interesting description of the scimitar.

How about these sword maidens:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u5kKmjsUjbI


maybe a group of women dancing for royalty, looking to be only beauties dancing with ceremonial swords, a threat to no one.  But they are well trained, assasins or secret defenders of the leader.
The dance does use blocks and thrusts, attack and defence.


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## glutton (Apr 2, 2013)

Yeah, I hope the reason the fighter is able to say that is cause he/she is superhuman.


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## Sia (May 22, 2013)

*Let's see... my reactions*

1) Depends what you mean by 'nothing'.   The characters in this WIP have the sense to actually prepare for a long journey so they're packing up and chatting and just showing off their personalities.

2) Nope, thank goodness.  Although there is a character with mysterious parentage... but there was no rape involved or anything.  His mother just got bored quickly and it is entirely her fault. 

3) Hmm... maybe.  It doesn't really come up though.

4)Not exactly.

5)Not really.  

6)Nope.

7)Nope

8) Ah, no, it contains several characters whose 'sole' purpose is to dispense information.  There's a whole class of people who have that purpose. Well, technically, they have families and stuff but the nobleman or king or whatever doesn't care - he just wants the information from his scribe or whatever.

9) Depends on who you ask. 


10) Nope but the farmhand... maybe.


11) Who knows? Possibly.


12)Hmm .. how are we defining a 'wizard'.


13) I have a gentle "giant" if that's any help?  Actually, he's just a very tall human.


14) Well, refuses to give plot points away for his own reasons, yes.  Mysterious reasons? Not so much.  Secrets of the guild and all that.


15) Well, some do, some don't.  

16) Probably.  I imagine there's a play with that premise somewhere and someone has to play the part, right?

17) Hmm ... perhaps.  All the scribes being women probably helps them advance there.

18) No.

19) No.

20) Not yet.

21) Nope, at least I don't know of any yet.

22) I haven't got that far yet.

23) Or that far.

24) No, I know they're also for getting somewhere. This is where my knowledge of ships end, however.

25) That's correct, I don't.  Still, it doesn't enter into the current WIP so...

26) I didn't draw a map in the first place.

27, 28, 29) No.  No prologue. No planned series.

30) Pass. I never actually printed the thing, you know. 

31) Again, define "nothing" 

32) No...

33) No

35) Perhaps.

36) Umm, yes.  Sort of. 

37) Umm .. maybe?

38) I do see something wrong with that.

39)  Elves, certainly. Not sure about the others.

40) Nope. 

Skip all the nonsense about RPG games, I don't do that.  I'll do the rest later.


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## brokethepoint (May 22, 2013)

I found the exam humorous, then I read the comments at the top.  Sounds like someone is sour about something.

I fail to see how answering yes to a couple of the questions has any relevance to originality or being a rip off.

The exam is listed in the humor bites so hopefully it is meant as humor, otherwise I would like to know what they consider original.


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## Ireth (May 22, 2013)

Let's see how my latest WIP holds up:

1) Quite a lot happens before page fifty, actually.

2) Nope.

3) Uh-uh.

4) Nope.

5) No.

6) Nope.

7) Nope.

8) Nyet.

9) Nein.

10) No.

11) No.

12) no

13) No

14) Nope

15) Nope.

16) No; in fact the male characters spend far more time getting captured and rescued than any females.

17) No.

18) Nope.

19) Kinda.

20) Nope.

21) Nope.

22) No dwarves feature in the story, so no.

23) No.

24) No.

25) No, but I fail to see how that's relevant.

26) I have no map.

27) No prologue.

28) Nope.

29) See 28.

30) Hard to say, since it's a) incomplete and b) not yet printed.

31) No.

32) No.

33) No.

34) That I can honestly say is a yes, if me and one other person count as a group.

35) Yes, the main human characters are originally from Earth, now living in Faerie.

36) No.

37) No.

38) I do see something wrong with that.

39) Yes to elves, no to the rest.

40) No.

41) I do have some half-Fae, but they're not really their own race.

42) Nope.

43) Considering this is an adaptation of a long-running RP, yes.

44) Nope.

45) Huh? No.

46) No...

47) No. I'm quite secure in my knowledge that I don;t really know how feudalism worked.

48) Nope.

49) Nope.

50) No.

51) No

52) Nope.

53) Hahaha, no.

54) I know it's freaking heavy, but I don't know the exact mass.

55) Of course not.

56) No.

57) No

58) Nope.

59) Nope

60) No.

61) Nope, he's got a lover from the very start, and they're both loyal.

62) No.

63) Depends on what the dagger's made of. If it's steel, then yes.

64) No.

65) no.

66) No.

67) No. Mead is made from honey.

68) Nope. The Fae actually have two rulers, who alternate by season.

69) No guilds.

70) Nope. She doesn't even punish significant mistakes with death.

71) No.

72) Nope.

73) Nope.

74) No.

75) Don't tell me what to do!


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## ThinkerX (May 22, 2013)

Going to go with 'Labyrinth' here; might occasionally refer to other works.

1.Does nothing happen in the first fifty pages? 
 Quite a bit happens.

2.Is your main character a young farmhand with mysterious parentage?
Nope.

3.Is your main character the heir to the throne but doesn't know it?

nope.

4.Is your story about a young character who comes of age, gains great power, and defeats the supreme badguy?

Heh...almost the opposite.

5.Is your story about a quest for a magical artifact that will save the world?
6.How about one that will destroy it?

No.  There is a magical artefact involved, but as such things go, it ain't much.  

7.Does your story revolve around an ancient prophecy about "The One" who will save the world and everybody and all the forces of good?

heck no.


8.Does your novel contain a character whose sole purpose is to show up at random plot points and dispense information?

I have several characters who dispense info.  I suppose one or two might show up randomly.  However, the MC is actively *looking* for info too.

9.Does your novel contain a character that is really a god in disguise?

'Empire' has a character that kinda-sorta fits the bill here.  More along the lines of 'possessed' or 'very minor avatar', though.  Not the case for my other works.

10.Is the evil supreme badguy secretly the father of your main character?

nope.

11.Is the king of your world a kindly king duped by an evil magician?

nope.

12.Does "a forgetful wizard" describe any of the characters in your novel?

nope.

13.How about "a powerful but slow and kind-hearted warrior"?

'powerful' - yes.  'slow'...not retarded, but not a genius, either.  'kind-hearted'...more like 'fun loving, with an occasionally abusive definition of 'fun'.


14.How about "a wise, mystical sage who refuses to give away plot details for his own personal, mysterious reasons"?

not really.

15.Do the female characters in your novel spend a lot of time worrying about how they look, especially when the male main character is around?

The main female character in 'Labyrinth' is way too old for such things.  'Theodora' in 'Empire' does try to 'look good,' though.


16.Do any of your female characters exist solely to be captured and rescued?

nope.


17.Do any of your female characters exist solely to embody feminist ideals?

not really.  Theodora in 'Empire' does chaff a bit at womans roles, but she's got a lot of other stuff going on.


18.Would "a clumsy cooking wench more comfortable with a frying pan than a sword" aptly describe any of your female characters?

I have a couple of peasant woman type characters that might apply to (in short stories)

19.Would "a fearless warrioress more comfortable with a sword than a frying pan" aptly describe any of your female characters?

fearless? no.  trained in weapon use...a couple.


20.Is any character in your novel best described as "a dour dwarf"?

I do have a few dwarves, but I'd hardly call any of them 'dour'

21.How about "a half-elf torn between his human and elven heritage"?

A couple of minor characters could fit that description, I suppose.


22.Did you make the elves and the dwarves great friends, just to be different?

nope.

23.Does everybody under four feet tall exist solely for comic relief?

nope.

24.Do you think that the only two uses for ships are fishing and piracy?

nope.  Though I do have a pirate attack in 'Labyrinth'.


25.Do you not know when the hay baler was invented?

what?

26.Did you draw a map for your novel which includes places named things like "The Blasted Lands" or "The Forest of Fear" or "The Desert of Desolation" or absolutely anything "of Doom"?

My current maps are mere outlines.  A large chunk is described as the 'Great Unknown Southern Plains', though.  Does that count?

27.Does your novel contain a prologue that is impossible to understand until you've read the entire book, if even then?

I am considering a short prologue for 'Labyrinth'.  If I go that route (big 'if) it will be very clear, though.

28.Is this the first book in a planned trilogy?

'Labyrinth' is envisioned to be two short novels, barely more than novella's.


29.How about a quintet or a decalogue?

'Empire' is slated to be four or five novella's, each on the order of 25,000 - 35,000 words, all standing alone, though with the same MC's..


30.Is your novel thicker than a New York City phone book?

No. Of them all, only 'Labyrinth' is novel length, and then just barely.


31.Did absolutely nothing happen in the previous book you wrote, yet you figure you're still many sequels away from finishing your "story"?

nope.

32.Are you writing prequels to your as-yet-unfinished series of books?

I do have some short story type prequels in mind.

33.Is your name Robert Jordan and you lied like a dog to get this far?

nope.


34.Is your novel based on the adventures of your role-playing group?

nope.


35.Does your novel contain characters transported from the real world to a fantasy realm?

nope.


36.Do any of your main characters have apostrophes or dashes in their names?

nope.


37.Do any of your main characters have names longer than three syllables?

Hmmm...'Titus Maximus' ... 'Theodora' ... 'Archon Zotikos'

38.Do you see nothing wrong with having two characters from the same small isolated village being named "Tim Umber" and "Belthusalanthalus al'Grinsok"?

what?


39.Does your novel contain orcs, elves, dwarves, or halflings?

goblins and hobgoblins, more than a little different from the AD&D versions, yes
elves, also different from the AD&D versions, yes (though they rarely make more than a cameo)
dwarves, yes, though more on the order of 'short long lived people' than the AD&D versions
halflings, no.


40.How about "orken" or "dwerrows"?

nope.


41.Do you have a race prefixed by "half-"?

half elves, maybe...but very, very rare.

42.At any point in your novel, do the main characters take a shortcut through ancient dwarven mines?

nope. The characters in 'Labyrinth' do venture into a highly abnormal and very dangerous underground environment a couple times though.


43.Do you write your battle scenes by playing them out in your favorite RPG?

nope.

44.Have you done up game statistics for all of your main characters in your favorite RPG?

I used to.


45.Are you writing a work-for-hire for Wizards of the Coast?

nope.


46.Do inns in your book exist solely so your main characters can have brawls?

Nope.  One in 'Empire' though is the scene of a mass kidnapping.


47.Do you think you know how feudalism worked but really don't?

Is this some sort of trick question?


48.Do your characters spend an inordinate amount of time journeying from place to place?

In Labyrinth, the MC travels better than 4000 miles.  Things happened.


49.Could one of your main characters tell the other characters something that would really help them in their quest but refuses to do so just so it won't break the plot?

nope.


50.Do any of the magic users in your novel cast spells easily identifiable as "fireball" or "lightning bolt"?

'fireball'...maybe...though it is far wimpier than the AD&D version.


51.Do you ever use the term "mana" in your novel?

I thought about it, decided otherwise.


52.Do you ever use the term "plate mail" in your novel?

nope.


53.Heaven help you, do you ever use the term "hit points" in your novel?

nope.

54.Do you not realize how much gold actually weighs?

yes.

55.Do you think horses can gallop all day long without rest?

heck no.


56.Does anybody in your novel fight for two hours straight in full plate armor, then ride a horse for four hours, then delicately make love to a willing barmaid all in the same day?

Hmmm...Casein might have the stamina for that sort of thing...but nope.


57.Does your main character have a magic axe, hammer, spear, or other weapon that returns to him when he throws it?

There is a magic ax...but its not throwable


58.Does anybody in your novel ever stab anybody with a scimitar?

nope.  hmmm...I don't think any of them have scimitars...


59.Does anybody in your novel stab anybody straight through plate armor?

nope.


60.Do you think swords weigh ten pounds or more? [info]

some do.


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## ThinkerX (May 22, 2013)

Sheesh..two parts for this stupid test?

61.Does your hero fall in love with an unattainable woman, whom he later attains?

lessee...not in 'Labyrinth'.  'Shadow Sea' is an arranged marriage. 'Empire'...not really.


62.Does a large portion of the humor in your novel consist of puns?

hardly.


63.Is your hero able to withstand multiple blows from the fantasy equivalent of a ten pound sledge but is still threatened by a small woman with a dagger?

nope.


64.Do you really think it frequently takes more than one arrow in the chest to kill a man?

nope.

65.Do you not realize it takes hours to make a good stew, making it a poor choice for an "on the road" meal?

I most certainly do realize that.


66.Do you have nomadic barbarians living on the tundra and consuming barrels and barrels of mead?

They live on the 'Great Unknown Southern Plains' and consume fermented mares milk.


67.Do you think that "mead" is just a fancy name for "beer"?

You mean its not?


68.Does your story involve a number of different races, each of which has exactly one country, one ruler, and one religion?

nope.


69.Is the best organized and most numerous group of people in your world the thieves' guild?

nope.


70.Does your main villain punish insignificant mistakes with death?

main villain...well, a couple of them are demonic/otherworldly psychopaths...


71.Is your story about a crack team of warriors that take along a bard who is useless in a fight, though he plays a mean lute?

Labyrinth: Titus and Casein are good fighters, no bard.
Empire: Peter is a good warrior, and there is a bard, but she's more into 'intel'.


72.Is "common" the official language of your world?

More like 'imperial' for solaria (bastardized descendant of latin)
Cimmar (across the ocean to the east) has its own language, rooted in in norse
The area west of Solaria was part of a large empire which employed a common trade tongue.
There are several different goblin/hobgoblin languages.
The 'true' elven tongue is almost telepathic.
Quite a few languages are spoken on the southern plains.


73.Is the countryside in your novel littered with tombs and gravesites filled with ancient magical loot that nobody thought to steal centuries before?

There are a lot of graveyards, yes.  Most are long looted, though.


74.Is your book basically a rip-off of The Lord of the Rings?

nope.

75.Read that question again and answer truthfully

nope.


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## Ophiucha (May 23, 2013)

_17. Do any of your female characters exist solely to embody feminist ideals?_
 - Half point. I'm writing feminist SFF, so obviously they do have several traits that are specifically meant to address feminist issues. But none of them do nothing _but_ that. 

_25. Do you not know when the hay baler was invented?_
 - Not off the top of my head. But my story takes place in what is functionally the 1950s, so I think I'm safe.

_30. Is your novel thicker than a New York City phone book?_
 - It's entirely possible. Depends on which phone book we're talking about. There is one that is really thick, but the Yellow Pages often come in multiple volumes and are actually only about as thick as _Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban_. /has lived in NYC.

_33. Is your name Robert Jordan and you lied like a dog to get this far?_
 - Blast! You saw through my clever disguise. *twirls moustache*

_39. Does your novel contain orcs, elves, dwarves, or halflings?_
 - Halflings.

_41. Do you have a race prefixed by "half-"?_
 - Well, the halflings. With the hyphen, no. In linguistics (and presumably also like English grammar classes), we would always write the hyphen regardless of whether or not we expect it to be part of the world, such as "pre-" as the prefix for prefix.

_47. Do you think you know how feudalism worked but really don't?_
 - This question has _layers_, man. I have a strong interests in economics and I spent two years studying medieval history, though, so I'd like to think I have a decent idea of how it works.

_54. Do you not realize how much gold actually weighs?_
 - 196.97 u, if I'm not mistaken. chemistry jokes, woo!

_62. Does a large portion of the humor in your novel consist of puns?_
 - The writer of this questionnaire needs to keep an _o pun_ mind.

_65. Do you not realize it takes hours to make a good stew, making it a poor choice for an "on the road" meal?_
 - As a chef, I would say that you could make it in two hours, which is reasonable enough. Not instant, no, but most things aren't. Rotisserie roasts would take an hour and change, even pan-frying something would take a bit of time unless you were only serving one or two people. If you had access to a wizard who could keep it cool, you could make it in ridiculous bulk very easily and just eat for a few days, too. I mean, it's not your _best _choice, but you could do worse. The fact that you can use the crap pieces of meat makes it useful, too, for hunters who would have tons of less quality pieces of meat that they'd still not want to waste.

And yeah, a good stew would be best slow roasted for a few hours, but if you're on the road in medieval times, the standards of 'good' food are pretty low, to be honest, and I think you could suffer a bland stew. As long as the meat cooks, it's edible.


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## KRHolbrook (May 23, 2013)

Hm, I'll take a shot at this, I think.

1.) Rick Balder experiences a nightmare controlled by gods, then escapes a mental institute.
5.) You could say Rick is a magical artifact, but he's certainly not going to be saving the world.
6.) Not necessarily destroy the world, no.
8.) Nope, but a few characters point Rick in the direction they want him to go, depending on the will of the gods.
9.) Nobody is a god in disguise, they're merely followers.
16.) No, but Rick would say otherwise.
28.) After much thought, yes.

Some of those questions made me shudder.


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## Jess A (May 23, 2013)

Meyer said:


> Point.  I will counter that hunting can be very unreliable though.



True - even my feline shape-shifter has trouble catching things - because in the real world, not very hunt/trap is successful. 

A thread compiling an on-road menu might be fun.


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## Rantz (May 26, 2013)

This was very funny, and I was happy to note that I had VERY few "yes" answers. Thank goodness!


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## ArthurWalterson (Jun 1, 2013)

Kind of a mixed bag for me. Just to let you all know, these answers are decided by a few of my stories:
1. Of course it does!
2. Yes.
3. I don't think so.
4. Yeah.
5. Nope.
6. Yes.
9. Actually, it has many.
10. No.
12. Yes. Well, he can be at times.
14. Yup.
24. Well, those and shipping things. And people.
25. Not really, but I could guess.
29. Probably.
30. The omnibus will probably be.
36. Lots of them, in fact.
37. A few.
38. Yes, I do see a problem in that.
41. Nope.
48. Yes, but I like the journey scenes.
49. Yes.
50. Only one.
51. No. Certainly not.
52. Not that either.
54. Yes, I do.
55. No, I don't.
56. Not really.
60. No, but they can feel like that after holding them for a while. I speak from experience.
61. Not yet, anyway.
62. No.
64. It doesn't, though it can help his death come faster.
65. It doesn't take _that_ long. I made a huge pot the other day in about 1 1/2 hours.
67. I know it's much different, but I'm not entirely sure how.
68. A few are like that, but not all.
74. No.
75. Still no.

For most of the ones I left out, the answer was the less-cliche answer.
I think I've seen an automated version of this quiz somewhere before... Don't remember where, though.


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## ScipioSmith (Jun 2, 2013)

3.	Is your main character the heir to the throne but doesn't know it? I was going to answer yes to this, before I realised that it's actually his younger brother who's the heir.
4.	Is your story about a young character who comes of age, gains great power, and defeats the supreme badguy? Yes.
9.	Does your novel contain a character that is really a god in disguise? The disguise only ever fools one person.
19.	Would "a fearless warrioress more comfortable with a sword than a frying pan" aptly describe any of your female characters? She's a knight in training, when would she have learned how to cook.
50.	Do any of the magic users in your novel cast spells easily identifiable as "fireball" or "lightning bolt"? Yes.


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## Etna (Jun 12, 2013)

Great list to keep in mind.


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## Trick (Jul 1, 2013)

I could hedge and say that my answers to all the qustions were no but the below got me:

4. Is your story about a young character who comes of age, gains great power, and defeats the supreme badguy?

Yes, in its simplist form, I have to say yes. I am just left hoping that I'll avoid cliche because the MC knows nothing about the bad guy until he meets him in person and only decides to try and kill him out of a personal vendetta, without considering that it's the right thing to do. Basically, if the MC was never on any kind of mission involving the bad guy but ends up trying to defeat him in the end, does that avoid the cliche?

To be honest though, I wouldn't change it even if everyone thought it was a cliche. So far it's the only one so, SCORE!


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## Svrtnsse (Jul 1, 2013)

Failed on the first question. Nothing really happens in my story.


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## Renos (Jul 24, 2013)

Damn, I got one yes. I have to abandon my novel now!


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## Julius (Jul 30, 2013)

To be honest I do not think that this list is very helpful. A reminder of course that one should try to avoid to many cliches when it comes to fantasy writing or any writing for that manner. That does not however mean that if you answered yes to one, five our 10 of those questions that your novel is absolute crap. Of course the vast majority of first attempts for fantasy writers are going to be slightly cliche, not particularly good and greatly influenced by series like LOTR. That does not mean that they are bad things. Writing through an entire novel is the best learning process for any writer- and the purpose of writing is not always to strive to be as original as humanly possible. That being said of course one should try to refrain from writing something that is a much too worn out concept. I think the list is more intended as a joke, really.


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## Shanatos (Aug 6, 2013)

The really good advice though is the "nothing happens" one. That's the main one to avoid.


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