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Raspberry Beret


  1. Long ago, in the magical land of Bodakistan, east of England, the land of bodaks and no females, the king was troubled. King Bob was an elderly man of twenty five and knew he was to die soon. His dying wish was to hear a live song. He didn’t want to be sexist so he picked an American (hopefully raised by a female? Who cares.) and didn’t want to be racist either so picked a human (easy since there are no bodaks in America).

    He called out “Court Witch!”

    The witch ran in and bowed. Bob proclaimed:

    “Bring me Prince! I wish to hear Raspberry Beret live!”

    Saideth the witch:

    “But sire, Prince is dead.”

    “Oh bother. Wait… I know! You’re a witch! You can bring him back. NOW!”

    The witch grabbed his broomstick hastily and flew to Russia to steal Prince’s guitar from the government. He then flew back and casted a spell with his magic claws to bring Prince back to life. Prince heard the orders, got the nearest violinist, and performed Raspberry Beret, quite well too, as he was excited to be alive again. Bob was so happy that he died. Prince, being named Prince, was his only heir, because bodaks don’t have females (therefore no children.). Everyone lived happily ever after- aah! The Russians want the guitar back!

    The End
    Onemaus likes this.


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  1. Dark Lord Thomas Pie
    Wow, no reviews...I must be even more horrible than I thought.