I'm in a position where I've been on break from writing for ages and haven't written anything in a while. If you want to keep writing I think you would go on, but especially so read things you enjoy.
I admit I didn't read a lot, but I gathered that it seemed to be in a "present" tense - actions are described as happening as close as possible to 'right now' versus in the past tense. It's something that necessitates a lot of 'throw in back story' for artificiated tension.
Make them normal. Give them a human aspect and make their antagonist someone who would make sense as someone that would be an enemy for them.
It's a little bit of a cop out to have a protagonist who does the standard thing of being amoral, only to perform a binary good behaviour to balance it...
Hey guys. I waited two days and rewrote it but hey. I'm Royal, and I'm looking forward to Mythic . It seems like a much better place than typical fan fiction forums.