What's the funniest research you've ever had to do for your fantasy novel?

[Noma Galway]

When I first started my WIP, I wanted to know what would happen if you threw a knife into an electrically charged field. My antagonist had created a lightning ball, which would have pulled electrons from the surrounding atmosphere, meaning the surrounding atmosphere would have a very high positive charge. So I asked my high school physics teacher what would happen if a neutral-charge knife was thrown into this positively charged atmosphere. It took thirty minutes for him to try to figure out what I meant, and then he said he didn't know. That scene doesn't exist anymore, but it was fun to research.

 

[Ruby]

The funniest research I've done this week was for a flash fiction story I wrote in the ABC Fantasy thread. The word prompt was "ill".

I wanted my Monsters from outer space to be wearing pink, green or blue furry romper suits. I imagined them as looking like Teletubbies. For this I researched babygro and babygrow to get the correct spelling. Since posting the story, I've been told they're called 'Onesies' these days so I've just researched this. I still think the monsters are wearing giant babygros.

Btw the story was supposed to be horror but when I reread it I realised it's a comedy.

 

[psychotick]

Hi,

In Guinea Pig I had to find a way for angelic DNA to be available for a mad scientist to use. My solution was a to use Russion Orthodox monastory where the friezes were done with divine inspiration in the form of a paint brush made from the hair of an archangel. It was fascinating looking at the history of the particular monastory and the actual friezes themselves, and then blending together the known histories of their painting with my own somewhat creative version.

Most difficult part of the whole thing was that I didn't want to tred on any religious toes, so I left a message on a / the major Christian forum asking if anyone from that faith could take a look at the book and see if it caused any offence. That was three or four months ago. Still waiting for a reply.

Cheers, Greg.

 

[Addison]

My research succeeded and turned out a hundred times better than I could have wanted. One was fora fist fight scene, the other for an underwater scene. My research was for the fist fight went well as I tutored, with my kid brother. As we were finishing up our round I was helping him get one glove off and the little snot swung his other fist into my head. After that we went into a house-wide, wild yet friendly fight. The underwater scene wasn't as painful. Swimming at a friend's favorite swimming hole I spent a lot of time underwater, swimming through the palnts, rolling against the rocks. In another dive I found a small cave, AWESOME. Later at the lake I was walking after the missing Barbie-jet boat and fell into an underwater hole. DEEP hole! Cool, but deep. So I know what it feels like to get the crap beat outta you and how it feels to discover new worlds. If you've never been swimming anyplace but a pool or shallow ocean, you haven't been swimming.

 

[Lohengrin]

Sewers. More specifically Roman Sewers.
It all started when I was discussing about Lord of the Rings with a friend about how idealized it was, which lead to the topic of Elfic waste... When I started thinking about my own book this came back to my mind, and being a perfectionist I couldn't ignore such an important topic, right....?
So in my spare time between classes at college I would research about sewers, and how to make my cities not stink. This eventually started another research about roman aqueducts that in turn started another research about a home heating system that the romans used. All this because of a joke about Elfic waste.

Sometimes I wonder what's wrong with me xD

 

[Hagan]

Old languages and lettering. I was trying (and failing) to describe dead languages scrawled onto walls of a tomb being walked by a character who had never seen things like Sanskrit or Pictographic storytelling before and ended up making a mess of the section. I used my own ignorance to help with the writing as I did the research, but test reading said it left the whole thing reading a bit flat. Abandoned soon after.

It still makes me wonder at times whether the ancient stone masons and artisans got so good at carving life like statues was because they didn't want to spend all their time carving those letters into stones for prosperity "Sorry mr philosopher, can't put your treaties into this slab of rock for you, I'm busy making sure these marble boobs are 'just right'. Maybe next month."

 

[Addison]

I recently experienced two different researches, one on accident and the other was more fun than funny.
The fun one was baking related. After baking cakes, brownies cookies and pies I decided to try candies and such. I made some jelly/chewy candies, some hard candies. So then I found a pie that had a soft candy top. Making candies is fun! It smells weird and good at the same time. Bubbles catch in the mix so it looks like old stained glass. It comes in all varieties and can be beautiful as a truffle or as a little petite four. But it does get friggin hot really fast. I'm telling you, drop a bit of hot mix on your hand an you won't forget for a while, my wrist is still a bit red. Fun but painful, mostly fun.

The accidental one was thanks to my dog. I take them for a walk every day before dinner. Living next to the best trail north california has to offer, it's terrific for everyone. There's a river at the end of the walk and the dogs splash around, drink, cool off and such. Last night she went across the river after a critter. Well the silly mutt got her collar stuck in a bush and couldn't get free. So I went across, completely forgetting that the river had holes. I don't mean holes you trip in. I mean holes that you sink and splash to your head. I got a little stuck, thankfully my dog broke loose and helped me out. So that research helped me learn a real heart in your mouth "holy crap!" moment and what if feels like to go from nice and warm to bone cold.

Dogs are a writer's best friend.

 

[stephenspower]

1. How do you sex a dragon?

2. For two characters on a desert island, how do you make a still out of bamboo and pomegranate? Sadly, I had to scrap that bit.

 

[A. E. Lowan]

2. For two characters on a desert island, how do you make a still out of bamboo and pomegranate? Sadly, I had to scrap that bit.

The original way - let the sugary juice ferment in the fruit. Skip the bamboo. Half-rotten fruit has been getting monkeys, and our ancestors, sloshed for millennia.

 

[psychotick]

Hi,

Just out of curiosity - how do you sex a dragon? I mean do you have to lift up the tail to look?

Cheers, Greg.

 

[psychotick]

Hi,

Actually you probably could make a still out of bamboo. The main problem is to make sure the flame / heat doesn't touch the wood. So I'd probably use a big flat rock underneath the boiling chamber, then apply the flame to the underneath of the rock. The bamboo could work well as condensor coils (well tubes). I'd probably wrap material around the outside of them soaked in water to cool them. Of course your main problem is that without a thermometer and pressure gauge you don't know what you're distilling, i.e. how much alcohol vs how much wood alcohol (methanol). Get it wrong and you'll go blind.

Cheers, Greg.

 

[CupofJoe]

What makes a Fat-berg...
While I worked as a drain survey technician [yes that was a real job] for a few months I had an idea about a sewer living folk and the obstacles that might cause their society's demise... Aligators, flushed down the loo, giant rats etc. and then I found out aout Fat-bergs and after that it didn't get very far because I kept feeling ill.

 

[Ruby]

Hi,

I've been doing some funny research this week, trying to find a suitable name for my MC's dog. The MC's French and has a poodle named Fifi. I decided I wanted the dog to be male. I kept changing the dog's sex around and looking for other French dogs' names. Then, I thought, maybe the MC is just a contrary sort of person and would give her male dog a female name.

I solved the problem today: the dog has been murdered.

This has moved the plot along nicely. I now need to get her another dog.

 

[Snowpoint]

I've done a lot of reading on Turkish shadow puppets.

And the Stone city of Petra. Stone Cut architecture is fascinating, until you realize, you can just as easily make building out of the stone you remove to carve the city in the first place.

 

[A. E. Lowan]

Hi,

I've been doing some funny research this week, trying to find a suitable name for my MC's dog. The MC's French and has a poodle named Fifi. I decided I wanted the dog to be male. I kept changing the dog's sex around and looking for other French dogs' names. Then, I thought, maybe the MC is just a contrary sort of person and would give her male dog a female name.

I solved the problem today: the dog has been murdered.

This has moved the plot along nicely. I now need to get her another dog.

This reminds me of two of our characters. They spend many years in a dysfunctional cycle of getting together and breaking up, only to do it all over again. During their break-up periods they mess with each other. They can't stay away, but they're angry, so they pull pranks. One of hers is placing a wedding announcement for him in his alumni newsletter, inviting them all to join him in celebrating his marriage to his new spouse - Mitchel. She is a talented graphic artist and to print in the newsletter she puts together a lovely wedding picture of her (at this point) ex, a very attractive "Mitchel," and "their" Pomeranian, who has a teddy bear cut and is dressed in a tuxedo. He is named in the announcement as "Smoogie."

Years later the couple gets therapy and settles everything out. He gets a dog. You can guess what she names him.

 

[stephenspower]

Like a snake. The character uses a sliver of bamboo to check a newborn dragon for either a hemipenis or cloaca.

 

[psychotick]

Hi,

Ugh! That sounds painful! And if I wouldn't feel safe doing that to a snake, why on Earth would I do it to a dragon? I mean snakes only take small bites right?

Cheers, Greg.

 

[Chessie]

Last night, I read all about the invention of matches...and realized that the time period for their arrival was way after the era for my stories. Sigh. Magic it is. But it was still really fun to read that lighters were invented before matches (who would've thought). And then I read about the history of what people smoked in their pipes, etc. Rather interesting, especially when you consider what a pain it was to light your pipe if you didn't already have a fire going lol.

 

[Ruby]

Last night, I read all about the invention of matches...and realized that the time period for their arrival was way after the era for my stories. Sigh. Magic it is. But it was still really fun to read that lighters were invented before matches (who would've thought). And then I read about the history of what people smoked in their pipes, etc. Rather interesting, especially when you consider what a pain it was to light your pipe if you didn't already have a fire going lol.

Hi Chesterama,

Funnily enough after I read your post I realised that, as one of the characters in my WIP smokes a pipe, I also need to research this!

My story's set in 1899, Victorian England, although the smoker is French. I've just done some research on pipes and matches but couldn't find much information except that matches were invented in about 1830 and that the later safety matches contained phosphorous which caused bones diseases. They were also dangerously flammable.

 

[Chessie]

Yeah, interesting to know that matches were invented later than the Victorian era! Magic, Ruby. Its the only way to light that pipe.