opinions on this ending

[eternaldream24]

My main character was born in one world, but raised in another. The world she was raised in is the one where her family and friends and everything she knows is. She doesn't really remember the world she was born in. Well, she ends up going back to the world she was born in, and through a series of events she starts to forget completely about the world she was raised in.

I was thinking about maybe having her look at a picture of her parents (the one's who raised her) and she thinks they look familiar but she can't remember why...or something along that line.

What do you think?

Hope I explained it well enough.

 

[Queshire]

Bit depressing and sounds hard to do, but if done well it would be interesting. Since it's the ending, maybe not have the picture seem familiar, I mean it's the end of the story, it should END and if the main character's concerned about why it looks familiar it could cause problems. It can work, just be careful.

 

[JCFarnham]

It could need some ironing out as it were, but I think it's a good ending. I'm kind fond of unsure or vague endings (Did they? Didn't they? That couldn't possibly mean ...)

As Queshire said be careful. If the sense of familiarity is ALL the plot is driving towards it'll feel like a very unsatisfying ending indeed, so what you should probably do is work this into the "summarisation/reconciliation" section just after the climax. Most of the conflict has been tied up, the problems she faces in being of two worlds, and finally she looks at the picture and ... Fin.

Of course, for this ending to work I would think that the reader needs to be at least somewhat aware that its a picture of her "real" family.

Hope that helps clear things up.

 

[eternaldream24]

I want my ending to be sad and a bit vague, but not so much so that the reader wants to burn my book.

The one issue I have with that ending is I never mentioned a picture before so I'd have to go back and rewrite some parts.

I was thinking about maybe having her "daydream" or get these images of her family in her head, but she can't recall who they are.

Oh and thanks for the great responses.

 

[Lord Darkstorm]

ok, I'll ask....why? Why would she forget? I was born and spent part of my life in one area of the country and then after 10 years brought to a different part and had to deal with a completely different social system than the one I was used to. Did I forget the one I came form...no.

So I would have to ask, why would your character forget the people who raised them, and why would they forget the values and ideas they got form it?

 

[ThinkerX]

Hmmm...

...maybe she comes across the picture, looks at it, and see's only strangers - no recognition at all, and then tosses it aside.

 

[Caged Maiden]

That's how I would end it if it were me.

I'd have her well on her way in her new life, then see the photo, wonder what it is, and toss it back down, not even giving it another thought. That's pretty dramatic.

That being said, Darkstorm raises some good questions..... WHY?
When my grandma died, the last two days she was alive, she didn't remember me or my mom. There's nothing s gutting as having someone so far gone they can't recall their only child's name, and my question is why this character can't remember her parents. That's a pretty serious thing. Just make sure it doesn't get gimmicky or weird.

 

[ThinkerX]

That being said, Darkstorm raises some good questions..... WHY?

I could think of two fairly good reasons.

The first being a disease somewhat like Alzhiemers that affects the memory (or maybe some quirky varient of amnesia).

The other being a sort of magical curse, possibly part of the price paid for moving between worlds.

 

[Phoenix]

Very sad...I like it. Yes you can end it like that. I hate all these soppy happy endings. Endings were the good guys win, but have to pay a consequence are awesome. Out of curiosity, where can I read some of your book? I already know the ending...

 

[Griffin]

I agree with the consensus.

Perhaps make the memory loss an allegory to never forget your roots. The MC could have been so obsessed with finding out where she came from, she forgets about those in the present. The ones who cared for her. Just an idea.

 

[BeigePalladin]

I'd say it would work so long as you explain how she lost her memories again; if we're given no reasoning for the memory loss, it will come across as an attempt to force a sad ending, and I feel you need to explain how she lost her memories before you can ask if it works.

Once that's done, then either the "look, recolections and then end" or the "look and feel nothing" endings would work. The first would be more effective to induce sadness if the characters remebered weren't that fleshed out/sympathetic, because it's a reaction based on the protagonist (who I'm assuming is fleshed out ), whereas the second would work better if the people forgotten where highly sympathetic, and would tug on the heartstrings of the reader quite well.

the second one also dosen't leave people baying for a sequal, and as you said this wants to atually be an ending, that might be more effective.