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Demons and Wraiths

thetraveler

Minstrel
Demons and wraiths. Two races that tend to be a bit cliched in my opinion. Here's my spin on them.

To understand them, you need to know a bit about the theology of my world. There are two gods, Arian and the Darkness. Arian is a god of order, a benevolent god. The Darkness is the god of chaos, destruction, death. The two have been locked in an epic struggle since Arian created the three Realms and populated the Realm of Earth with his children. There you go.

Demons are said to be the drops of blood spilt when Arian wounded the Darkness during one of their fights. The drops of blood spilled into the Realm we call the Underworld, and demons were birthed. In the Underworld, they exist as a tongue of fire, a hypnotic flame that dances in the eternal twilight which covers those lands. However, when a blood mage casts a ritual spell to grant them entrance to our Realm of Earth, they take physical form. Demons in the Realm of Earth appear as men of great stature. Not giants, but they tend to look about 220-250 pounds and not one of them stands under 6' tall. All of them have a tattoo of a flame on their spine. In the Realm of Earth, the demons have great power. They can influence the element of fire. They have the ability to lift objects weighing as much as five tons, and they have reflexes that only the most harshly trained mortals can hope to match.

Female demons are known as ice demons. In the Underworld they appear as a cold wind. They gain entrance to the Realm of Earth the same way as male demons. They possess the same powers, except they influence the element of ice instead of fire. Instead of the hulking appearance of fire demons, ice demons appear as an extremely beautiful woman, only that they appear to have been starving. Sunken eyes, visible ribs.


Wraiths are the counterpart of demons. Arian created them as the guardians of the Relam of Earth, and gave them home in the Shadow Realm. They appear as a man in a smudged painting whether in the Shadow Realm or the Realm of Earth... It's not quite possible to fully focus your eyes on one and get a clear image. Wraiths can turn into shadow at will. While not strong or lightning fast like the demons, they are silent, and can stop hearts with a single touch. They can get into the Realm of Earth through four gates Arian created in the Shadow Realm, with one rule. Arian and the Darkness made this rule when they began their game for lordship over the Realms. There can never be more wraiths in the Realm of Earth than demons, or vice-versa. If one of the Darkness' followers summons a new demon into the Realm of Earth, a wraith may travel there as well.

That's my demons and wraiths in a nutshell. Whatcha think?
 
That's a very different take on them. I always like it when people use different methods to explain why demons exist and your "born from blood" idea was very creative. The only thing I would suggest would be to give the Darkness an actual name since the benevolent God has one.
 

Roc

Troubadour
Demons and wraiths cliche? I don't think so, heck, I haven't read about wraiths in a novel forever.

I think vampires and werewolves are cliche...
 
TBH, reading this, I don't really see your versions as anything new - traditional fire/cold powers, break into our world through blood sacrifice, female ones are impossibly attractive to give reclusive nerds fantasies... just as "cliché" as the origional :p. overall, the ideas are pretty good, and should work :)

Though, as an unrelated - but slightly linked rant -ror something to be 'too' cliche requires us to live in a world were paper is too papery, or a computer to computery. Cliche's are not a bad thing, nor are they something that can be measured. they just are. They are techniques, styles or plots that are memorable and effective enough to be immitated or adapted - something only becomes a cliché by being effective, so how can they be bad? thats like saying acing a test is worse than failing.

what matters in a piece of work is the quality, not the origionality - something can be purely origional and never before done, if the quality is low then it will fail and be disliked, and something can be made entierly of "clichés" but if its well written, people will read and enjoy it.

thats not to say don't strive for origionality, but, well, don't declare something too cliché to be used. if it fits, it fits, and it will still work regardless of how origional it is or not. just adapt it for your piece of work, but don't be afraid of cliches because, in the end, everythings cliché to someone - and if your origional idea is successful enough, it too will become a cliche retoractivly :p

on an (even more) unrelated note, what is with all these "is this too cliche/this classic piece of fantasy is too cliché/cliché something something something" posts rcently?
 
I just want to ask.. Since you said the rules of the 'game' is that for 1 demon summoned, 1 wraith shall enter into the realms, via the gates.. So how is it going to end? I mean the 'game'? Are the demons trying to destroy the gates, while the wraiths try to stop people from summoning?

Next is how will the humans or other races come into play? Since the summoner of the demons might be trying to use the demons for some havoc wreaking, is there any good guys which will stop them?

I think for the control of fire and ice, it does feel a bit common... Like most demons in many books have the power of fire,, maybe you can come out with some special abilities.... It will kinda kill my own story, but I should share this.. Maybe the demon's abilities can be unique. That means every or most demons have special and unique abilities, like gravity control, extreme speed, and etc? Maybe it will be more interesting??
 

Mindfire

Istar
Interesting ideas. It seems to have a very Zoroastrian feel to it. Just two questions though:
-Why do the demons have a physical form on Earth and an ethereal one in the Shadow Lands? Shouldn't it be the opposite way?

-If your wraiths come from the good god, why are they associated with darkness and shadow instead of light? An interesting use of the Dark is Not Evil trope, but I'd suggest taking it a step further. Why not have the wraiths possess no true form of their own that a mortal could comprehend, but when someone sees them they act as spiritual mirrors, reflecting back at the person his own thoughts and fears. I.e. a good person will see a being of light or feel a warm and comforting presence, while an evil person will see a creature of darkness and shadow and feel uncontrollable fear.
 

Mindfire

Istar
Interesting ideas. It seems to have a very Zoroastrian feel to it. Just two questions though:
-Why do the demons have a physical form on Earth and an ethereal one in the Shadow Lands? Shouldn't it be the opposite way?

-If your wraiths come from the good god, why are they associated with darkness and shadow instead of light? An interesting use of the Dark is Not Evil trope, but I'd suggest taking it a step further. Why not have the wraiths possess no true form of their own that a mortal could comprehend, but when someone sees them they act as spiritual mirrors, reflecting back at the person his own thoughts and fears. I.e. a good person will see a being of light or feel a warm and comforting presence, while an evil person will see a creature of darkness and shadow and feel uncontrollable fear.
 

thetraveler

Minstrel
TBH, reading this, I don't really see your versions as anything new - traditional fire/cold powers, break into our world through blood sacrifice, female ones are impossibly attractive to give reclusive nerds fantasies... just as "cliché" as the origional :p. overall, the ideas are pretty good, and should work :)

Though, as an unrelated - but slightly linked rant -ror something to be 'too' cliche requires us to live in a world were paper is too papery, or a computer to computery. Cliche's are not a bad thing, nor are they something that can be measured. they just are. They are techniques, styles or plots that are memorable and effective enough to be immitated or adapted - something only becomes a cliché by being effective, so how can they be bad? thats like saying acing a test is worse than failing.

what matters in a piece of work is the quality, not the origionality - something can be purely origional and never before done, if the quality is low then it will fail and be disliked, and something can be made entierly of "clichés" but if its well written, people will read and enjoy it.

thats not to say don't strive for origionality, but, well, don't declare something too cliché to be used. if it fits, it fits, and it will still work regardless of how origional it is or not. just adapt it for your piece of work, but don't be afraid of cliches because, in the end, everythings cliché to someone - and if your origional idea is successful enough, it too will become a cliche retoractivly :p

on an (even more) unrelated note, what is with all these "is this too cliche/this classic piece of fantasy is too cliché/cliché something something something" posts rcently?

I think you may have misread it... I just didn't emphasize the starving aspect of the ice demons enough. It's more like they appear they could be beautiful, but the fact that they look like they haven't had any sustenance in months kind of ruins that.
 

thetraveler

Minstrel
Interesting ideas. It seems to have a very Zoroastrian feel to it. Just two questions though:
-Why do the demons have a physical form on Earth and an ethereal one in the Shadow Lands? Shouldn't it be the opposite way?

-If your wraiths come from the good god, why are they associated with darkness and shadow instead of light? An interesting use of the Dark is Not Evil trope, but I'd suggest taking it a step further. Why not have the wraiths possess no true form of their own that a mortal could comprehend, but when someone sees them they act as spiritual mirrors, reflecting back at the person his own thoughts and fears. I.e. a good person will see a being of light or feel a warm and comforting presence, while an evil person will see a creature of darkness and shadow and feel uncontrollable fear.

I really like this idea. I'm probably going to use it in some aspect.
 

Lorna

Inkling
I like your descriptions

In the Underworld, they exist as a tongue of fire, a hypnotic flame that dances in the eternal twilight which covers those lands.

They appear as a man in a smudged painting whether in the Shadow Realm or the Realm of Earth...

Your concepts might not be original (what is?) but if you follow through developing the language describing them they might grow to be.
 
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