Now I know why I write fantasy: question inside.

[DianthasProphecy]

Oh My Lord. I'm writing a book and it's been going great! Lots of magic! But, as we all know, most readers like a bit of romance in their books, even if it is a fantasy. So I've found a way to add in a romantic interest and have it contribute to the fantasy part of the plot line. Now, I may be a girl but I hate writing the sappy romance scenes. It plays a part later, so it is necessary. (A fellow writer friend of mine who is also a girl and hates this crap and I have dubbed these scenes 'sappy crap') So tell me, how do you write them? What are some key elements to add in? I don't know how to do this stuff in real life much less know how to write what the woman is feeling and blah blah.
Any help out there?

 

[JustSpiffy]

Try making relationships more realistic, that'll probably get rid of allot of the sappyness. Y'know, these two people bitch and argue, nitpick each and every thing their love interest does, maybe their relationship goes through problems, but through all their problems they really care for each other, and there's situations that arise when they demonstrate this, even if they're not aware of it... It doesn't have to be all chocolates and roses. Also, the pre-romance situation is always fun to write about, especially if they're teenagers.

I guess what I'm saying is just try to avoid fairy tale romances if you don't want sappy. <3~

 

[JustSpiffy]

As for specific key elements... I probably know as much as you do about that... It really depends on the age/personality of your characters, I guess. Is your female character erratic and flighty? Is she calm and patient? Is your male character a little dense and oblivious? Are they young, teenagers, young adults?

 

[Donny Bruso]

I agree with Spiffy. Romance in real life doesn't work the way we have all been conditioned by Hollywood to believe that it does. Romeo and Juliet is a nice fantasy, but that's all it is. Think about it. You're a girl chilling on your balcony, maybe having a glass of wine and thinking about the cute stableboy when suddenly you hear a noise from the bushes down below. Do you stand there and exchange words with the stalker or do you scream for the guards? Remember that in medieval times rape is exceedingly common. Yeah, you're screaming for the guards,. The guy gets snapped up, tossed in the dungeon, and (pending local laws) castrated. So much for star crossed lovers, eh?

Personally my characters who end up romantically involved are pretty antagonistic towards each other. They bicker, fight, criticize, attack each other, and hide behind their egos and pride. It may not be realistic, though that always depends on the people, but it sure isn't sappy.

 

[Ophiucha]

I hate writing sappy romance, and I say this as someone who is incredibly schmoopy when it comes to my fiance. We're cuddly, never argue, can't be apart for more than a couple of days, the whole deal. But I can't write it; I hate reading it, so why would I know how to write it? And, frankly, I just don't. If I have romance in my novel, it's between characters who are adults with past lovers, or better yet, the two characters are already in love, probably already married. I think it's enough to have two characters in love, whether they fall in the story or not.

As for the things that would make a romance feel 'real' to me, if I am reading it, I think a sense of familiarity is important to me. Being able to answer questions for each other. "What do you want?" "He'll have diet coke." Not having to communicate things to each other after a while. Having the girl remove the sports section from the newspaper every morning and putting it on the boy's side of the table for him to read, without prompting. A certain sense of reliability. I don't want to say dependence - that oft comes across as unhealthy (see: Twilight) - but something similar. That's always what made me feel like there were two people who are becoming one entity. That can happen before they date or not, but regardless, I find that sense to be a real sign of love. If you want to build up to just them wanting to date each other, then just have some common interests and sexual tension to explore.

 

[Chilari]

Sometimes I am a total sap about romance. One of my stories completely came undone recently as a result. It was meant to end tragically, but I just couldn't write it. I kept coming back to the core romance which, in the tragic version, turns very sour indeed and results in the tragic conclusion. But I wanted it to be a happy ending too much and can't help but write sappy nonsense between the particular characters. I simply can't focus on the bigger picture because I like the characters too much. So that's on hold because a story about the author's darlings isn't interesting.

The thing is, I am utterly divided by romantic stories and subplots. On the one hand I'm a total sucker for the Hollywood cliches done well. There are a few films that, when my housemate suggested them, I scoffed at, only to end up blubbing like a baby an hour and a half later. But on the other I don't want to write cheesy nonsense, partly because I know I can think up better storylines than that if I put a few minutes thought into it, and partly because I want to write more realistic situations than your usual Disney setup. In the story I am now working on, I have two romances planned. One is an existing casual relationship between two individuals who see each other rarely, but when they do get to spend time together, make the most of it, but are each very independant. The other is between two very naive teenagers who think they're in love, and ends rather abruptly when he dies in the war, only for her to discover shortly afterward that she's pregnant, and to prevent scandal and also avoid assassins and political puppeteers, to to speak, she has to go and hide.

 

[CicadaGrrl]

Don't make it sappy or crappy. If you look down on it while you write it, it will suck. Give it the attention and respect as any other writing. And stay firmly stuck in your characters. They will fall in love the way they do everything else. But in their humor (romance is always better with a grain of salt). Put in insecurities that mess up the relationship. Put in your characters. Do not let them become crappy and sappy. Don't change who they are, other than if falling in love changes something in them--their ability to trust, for instance.

 

[Dante Sawyer]

Think about the personalities of your characters. Let the romance and dialogue flow as though it’s them falling in love. Think about any relationships you’ve ever been in and use that for inspiration. When you just begin to like someone you have your own unique way of expressing that. Your characters should too.

Also, I don’t think good romance scenes are necessarily all sappy. For example, you could have immense sexual tension in a scene (it’s not sappy, but it can add a nice sub-plot to the story itself, without detracting from the main conflict), or you may choose to just have one of your characters catch the eye of another character (you can describe how the character feels about the other, even if it’s just in a flattering way; because, really, there are numerous cases in real life where someone doesn’t realize they even like the person romantically for some time. They just assume it’s the person’s traits they like to be around). Those are just two example, however, but I feel like the best romance scene should flow naturally.

 

[Chinaren]

I'm not good with this type of scene, and as a result tend to either simply not do them, or only dip my toe in, leaving much of the action to the imagination of the reader.

Yes, I'm a coward. So sue me.