Need a Little Pick-Me-Up

[Griffin]

So, I've decided that this will be my last semester of college. I finished my Gen Eds. and now I have to decide on a major. However, I am not ready. I have no idea what to do as a "career." My family has always thought I was going to be this or going to be that. Anything I slightly enjoyed was smothered. For example, I used to play the clarinet. I used to enjoy it. Then, my mother got the idea that I was going to be a famous clarinetist. Playing the instrument became more of a chore. Heck, even my love for writing waned when my father pushed me to publish a novel at the age of 13 (so I could beat that 'Eragon kid.')

Anyway, I made the decision of leaving college. My tuition money is running low and I can't afford another semester without taking out a loan. Since I am torn on what to do for a major, I decided to that it's best for me to leave now and come back at a later date. I know that it's 'harder' to go back, but I'll end up wasting my time and money trying to figure out what to do.

Of course, my family is disappointed with me. I haven't even dropped out yet and my mom's already treating it like a failure. My friends look at me like I have lost my mind. Luckily, my significant other is on my side.

I guess I just need to vent. It's my first real decision as an adult, so I guess I'm just scared. I am not a child anymore. Everything I do today shapes what I will be tomorrow. I spent a lot of time about leaving college. I weighed the cons and pros. Right now, at this point of my life, it makes more sense to leave college. Live life a little.

I apologize for the long post. I needed to get this out of my system. Thank you in advance.

 

[JCFarnham]

As long as you have some qualifications to show for the time you havespent in college, then I see no reason why shouldn't follow your own decisions. We should all be living life for ourselves, not for the benefit of others.

I certainly see your point.

Here's my philosophy on life. As long as you don't do anything ridiculously stupid today, your tomorrow is going to be just fine. So don't sweat it. Now is what matters, and now is the time to enjoy your life. If you live only to make the hypothetical future better (and that future never really comes does it) then what have you got to show for it?

What ever anyone says I've always thought that enjoying your life is the number one thing.

A quick anecdote: I recently quit the job seeker's allowance program we have here in the UK. Some people, my mother especially, thought that was a stupid move on my part. The thoughts being, if I'm entitled to money and the benefit of an adviser why should I not take it? The fact is due to government rules I'm not going to be able to get any "allowance" out of the scheme. The whole point of claiming JSA is to help you with your finances while you search for a paying job. I couldn't get a penny from them, it was making me depressed beyond belief (NOT a good thing), so I dropped it. I didn't need the added heartache. It's difficult to get a job as it is.

It seems to me that you're in a similar situation, where the cons out weigh the pros. You know it can be good to go to college but is it worth it in your case? Well, no it doesn't have to be.

If the job market is anything like it is here in the UK, then everyone will be having trouble, degree or not. The real thing you need right now seems to be working experience and professional qualifications (CIMA for the accountants, and so on and so forth). And most of all LIFE EXPERIENCE. I mean sod it, if all you need to pay for the life style you love is a shop floor retail wage when so be it. There's more important things in life right?

I definitely don't think your decision is a bad one, especially if you think you have other better routes. There was a time in history when not a lot of people had degrees and they still held down jobs and houses, and you know what? They enjoyed life just fine.

I know exactly what you're saying about peoples enthusiasm for your hobbies draining the fun out of it.

 

[Aosto]

I never continued my education beyond technical school where I only earned a diploma. I felt that all the theory taught didn't lend to real world experience. I found what I wanted to do and started at the bottom. I am now a technical Specialist for a major insurance company making a decent living. Not going back to school was my best decision, I don't have a pile of student loans, I do have some, but not a load.
On the job market front, I find a lot of people who want to start out making middle class wages, this is why they fall short of their job search. I accepted that I wouldnt start at $55k a year, started at $12 an hour. In 6 short years I worked my way up. It's about dedication and joy for what you do. I left a cushy job, one I loved, to pursue a higher paying job. In the end I hated it. Granted, I don't particularly enjoy where I'm at now. It's still working with technology that I like, and being in a management position.

 

[Guru Coyote]

You need to do what You decided. I does not count so much if it is the Right Decision, but it has to be Your's.

Oh, and what if you make a mistake? Let me give you some Coyote Medicine here - "Any mistake should be repeated as often as there are people around who might learn from it..."

They key is not to avoid erroes, but to learn from the ones we make

 

[Philip Overby]

I like my job as a teacher, but it's just that: a job. I use it to make money so I can do other things I like such as traveling, writing, etc. I think this push for everyone to get a college education isn't really necessary anymore. Find a trade or something you like doing and make just enough money so you're comfortable and then do stuff you like doing. Maybe you'll hit a wall, but that's what life is. A series of walls you can either climb over, stand in front of, or smash.

 

[JCFarnham]

Another story I've just remember is that a good friend of mine from high school (and indeed most of my childhood in fact) is a very clever lad, but he didn't follow the rest of us into university. Instead he took up a job at a Specsavers he had been offered a year or so earlier during a "work experience week" we were forced to do. He started right down at the bottom.

You know what? He's now the day-to-day manager of that store and part way into dealing with another near by branch as well and a qualified optometrist. Not bad going huh?

See? A good example of some one who wait against the expected grain and got lucky. Personally I still believe that university was the right course of action for me at the time. Not only did I not have that job to fall into like my friend, I wanted the life experience of living away from home and growing as my own person rather than as a product of my family.

 

[srcroft]

My friend,

Listen to the journey of a 33 year old guy. I started college at 18 and messed around until 22. I dropped out, and got crappy jobs here and there and mostly I focused on hobbies like writing and art.

At 24 I got married. No time for school had to pay bills. Got 3 herniated discs and could barely walk for a year, and got surgery and was 100% fixed (which is unusual). I got a job based on my hobby of art and skills at communications. Graphic Design and Web Design.

I got promoted to Project Manager, then Director -- then subsequently fired because the economy went south. Mind you I was fired a week after buying a house. At 30 my wife finally got pregnant by then I was 2 years out of work. So depressed I couldn't write--but I picked myself up and realized--despite a writer not needing a degree I would get mine! So I did. First me AA in English, Then BA--but again terror struck.

We couldnt make ends meet so I was going to join the military. Give up all I knew and loved. 30 Days I had left to decide, but I got a job.

Now in my crazy journey--I am proud of my degrees. I work Full time as a User Experience Product Manager / Art Director and make serious money. I am working on my masters. My wife, 12 weeks ago got pregnant again. My Novel is almost finished.

I say all this because I started writing short novellas in 3rd GRADE! I thought I'd be stephen king by now.

All my experience, especially the bad--they've seasoned my writing, they've made me so much better as a person and writer.

I've had my family come down on me, be disappointed etc. Its your life. You live once, experience it the way that makes you happy. It will come around as long as you have faith in yourself, respect for yourself, and never give up.

Don't worry about where to set your bar of expectation--just ride the ride. Get FAFSA loans and pells, for school if you want to go back--its worth it if you love writing.

Its easy for me to say education is so important, but look how long it took me to be ready. I have a 4.0 at Fairleigh Dickinson, going for my masters and working full time. You can't do that unless you love it and are ready. You will be.

 

[Penpilot]

If you've thought this through and given things their pros and cons then do what you think is right not what others think is.

For myself, I've attended almost every post secondary school where I live. I've got a degree, a diploma, and certificates out the wazoo. Some of those I did because it was the thing expected of me, the practical thing to do, but they never got me to a place where I was happy. The final time I went back to school was to get my degree. It was my decision after spending years working. It was hard going back, but it once I decided, there was no stopping me. I was 100% committed. I knew what I wanted and no matter how hard it got in school, I didn't waver because I was there on my terms. One of the best decisions of my life.

 

[Steerpike]

Griffin - you are a young guy. You can do anything you want, be successful along any of a variety of uncountable paths, and you don't have to do it all in the order typically prescribed by society. We're not machines who follow instructions to go from step A to B to C. We're breathing, thinking creatures living a life (the only one we have) and we choose the path that calls to us most strongly.

There is absolutely nothing merely in the fact of leaving school now that will prevent you from having a long, successful, and fulfilled life. From where you're at right now, it may be entirely conducive to it. Do what you feel is right; when you find yourself at a later time having a need or desire to return to school, it will still be there.

 

[Benjamin Clayborne]

I apologize for the long post. I needed to get this out of my system. Thank you in advance.

You are incredibly brave. Good luck in whatever you choose to do next.

 

[Griffin]

Oh man, you guys are so awesome. I feel a lot more confident now. Thank you, Fellow Scribes. You guys are a huge morale booster. I could not appreciate you more.

 

[srcroft]

I'm sure everyone's more than happy to help. All of us hit the wall no and again, many of us have struggles--Do unto others, Pass it along, & The more you know and all that classic rhetoric

 

[Zero Angel]

So you know, your major is not as important as it used to be. Many people get jobs outside of their major. If you are interested in continuing your education, choose something that interests you--if it is tangentially related to the field you want to work in, then even better.

If you want to join the workforce now, then go for that. But as a teacher I ask, please never stop learning whether in college or out.

 

[srcroft]

Absolutely, learning is fun and can be awesome. I am a Lit major with creative writing minor, post grad. I work in the product management / UI UX Design field. So my major has nothing to do with my work, but I am not stopping until I finish my PHD.