Kasper Hviid
Sage
I thought it could be fun to see what mental images you clever folks are peddling. Please share! Let me see your similes, metaphors and what-have-you.
I start! Here's the current opening of my story:
Orc Girls Gone Feral : Beginning
Did you read it? No? Skimmed it, then? Okay, good enough! Let's pull it apart and see what I tried to do, successful or not:
Sinkpath. An open wound in the land, dark, wet and infected
I try to buy into the racist metaphor where the homeland is seen as a body, and the foreign others an infection thereof. Also, I just love body horror, so the metaphor of a diseased body speaks to me.
Sinkpath. Everlasting fog obscuring her horribly sterile vastness, like the cloudy water of the sea shields our gaze from the horrors deep below.
Referring to Sinkpath as her is kind of old-fashioned, but grants her a metaphorical body of her own. The stuff about the water is an attempt to dig into the Cthulhu mythos, and hint at the existence of the sea.
infested with sperm ocrans [...]
This place was getting under his skin.
The infection metaphor, yet again.
[Poem]
Not much interesting metaphor here. I added it to foreshadow the themes of music and of motherhood
To become a great artist, Hugharth knew, one must make sacrifices
The pen is stronger than the sword, but. Keep both close at hand.
A breath of wind brushed against his face
Here, a few metaphors turn into reality.
In the next chapter, I have a bunch of characters in a political debate. I try to use as many argument-is-war metaphors as possible. The argument is right on target, his arguments were shot down, he never lost an argument, and so on. By opening with war metaphors I hope to make the group seem rather unstable. At the end of the chapter, the protagonist turn the metaphor into reality:
Surely, Doniho would have wanted her brother to win, but the silly bickering wasn’t important. What would happen when they had to pass through human territory? That’s what mattered. Out here, the topic had practical implications. Life or death, as it were. They shouldn’t be fighting each other. Not now. Not out here. They should be fighting the humans.
I start! Here's the current opening of my story:
Orc Girls Gone Feral : Beginning
Did you read it? No? Skimmed it, then? Okay, good enough! Let's pull it apart and see what I tried to do, successful or not:
Sinkpath. An open wound in the land, dark, wet and infected
I try to buy into the racist metaphor where the homeland is seen as a body, and the foreign others an infection thereof. Also, I just love body horror, so the metaphor of a diseased body speaks to me.
Sinkpath. Everlasting fog obscuring her horribly sterile vastness, like the cloudy water of the sea shields our gaze from the horrors deep below.
Referring to Sinkpath as her is kind of old-fashioned, but grants her a metaphorical body of her own. The stuff about the water is an attempt to dig into the Cthulhu mythos, and hint at the existence of the sea.
infested with sperm ocrans [...]
This place was getting under his skin.
The infection metaphor, yet again.
[Poem]
Not much interesting metaphor here. I added it to foreshadow the themes of music and of motherhood
To become a great artist, Hugharth knew, one must make sacrifices
The pen is stronger than the sword, but. Keep both close at hand.
A breath of wind brushed against his face
Here, a few metaphors turn into reality.
In the next chapter, I have a bunch of characters in a political debate. I try to use as many argument-is-war metaphors as possible. The argument is right on target, his arguments were shot down, he never lost an argument, and so on. By opening with war metaphors I hope to make the group seem rather unstable. At the end of the chapter, the protagonist turn the metaphor into reality:
Surely, Doniho would have wanted her brother to win, but the silly bickering wasn’t important. What would happen when they had to pass through human territory? That’s what mattered. Out here, the topic had practical implications. Life or death, as it were. They shouldn’t be fighting each other. Not now. Not out here. They should be fighting the humans.
Auror
