The Misery of Writing

[Philip Overby]

This is just something I'm noticing recently (not necessarily on Mythic Scribes, but elsewhere), but I'm finding that a lot of writers seem completely miserable with what they're doing. I can't quite understand doing something that makes you miserable every day you do it (except working, because, you know, money). However, is the misery of writing, or not writing, actually needed?

I'm just curious because I don't really use writing for cathartic reasons anymore. When I was a teenager or in my twenties I used my writing to express emotions I was feeling. Now I do writing because it's fun and I like doing it. Not to say I am detached emotionally from my writing, because I'm not, but it's just a different feeling nowadays.

I've heard of people suffering for their art, but is it completely necessary?

 

[CupofJoe]

I think the "suffering for the art" is to disguise how much fun we are having just making things up and writing them down.
But there again I write for fun and the art of writing [utterly subjective but I like trying to write better than I have before] so I do think for some including myself there is an element of unfulfilled promise too.... Only you know how good that idea really was but you couldn't find just the right words to get it across.
But mostly I think that the people that complain so much, that its all hard and painful; and they are tearing at their souls to claw out a story; and it's like giving birth to triplets... will never be satisfied or happy... On a nice sunny day with a drink in their hand and nothing to do, they'd complain the ice in the drink is too cold...
The giving birth metaphor analogy was said to me in front of a woman who had just had a caesarian. She laughed so hard she had to sit down in case she tore something. It was said by a poet - and they are strange...

 

[Trick]

The only suffering I do for my writing is spending so much free time doing it, losing out on some things and not getting chores completed. The actual writing is a pleasure. IMO anyone who feels like they're dragging it out of their soul needs medication or better become the best damn writer in a century. If it hurts so bad, become a painter... of walls, not art.

Now, if you cry when a character dies, cheer when your hero overcomes something or laugh out loud when the MC makes a joke, good for you! That means it's real for you and in the moment it probably should be. But don't tell me a week later at a dinner party about how your writing is taking so much out of you that it's like (insert bad simile). And any man who compares the pain of writing to giving birth needs a lesson in pain. If a mother did it, I'd still wonder why her writing was such a difficult and painful task but at least she'd know what she was talking about.

Just my $0.02

 

[Ryan_Crown]

I wouldn't use the term "miserable", but for me the word "frustrating" very often comes to mind. When I'm in the zone and the words are flowing, it's amazing. Same thing when I'm brainstorming for ideas, and just having fun coming with all kinds of fun, crazy ideas for stories. The frustrating part comes (and I guess I can see how this would make some people miserable) when that great idea ends up going nowhere, or I'm halfway through a story and suddenly realize I have no idea where to go next with it.

But for me the joy I get from writing is more than worth whatever stress or frustration (or misery) that comes along with it.

 

[Incanus]

I'm going to play devil's advocate here, just a little. I'm going to view this as being 'on a spectrum'--one side being the 'happy-go-lucky, just throw any old words down' and the other being something more like James Joyce with his head in his hands saying 'I only wrote seven words today, but the worst of it is: I have no idea what order they go in! Arrgh!' (not an actual quote)

I'm not sure where I am along this spectrum--probably somewhere in the middle. If I was reading something which was written with the attitude that any old idea will do, any old word, and it doesn't matter much, I think I would quickly see that the writer just didn't want to be bothered with putting in the work necessary to make something really special. I might finish the book or story, but I certainly won't be seeking out more of the same author. I'm a rather picky reader, slow and careful.

I believe that literature--even genre literature--should have some amount of artistry. And that requires hard work. Hard work means struggling, sweating, questioning things, reworking things, always seeking ways to improve.

I'm not generally 'miserable', but I find that writing to my own satisfaction is pretty difficult, though not impossible.

I have to wonder: If a writer is struggling only a little, or not at all, are they growing as a writer?

 

[Trick]

I have to wonder: If a writer is struggling only a little, or not at all, are they growing as a writer?

Struggling as a writer is all well and good but if it's making you miserable then why do it? I struggle with writing constantly but every little step forward is a mini victory. Working on a car can be hard work and I may cuss and throw a wrench or two in the process but when the engine roars to life after the job is done, I'm not only happy, misery never entered the equation.

If a writer fails so terribly that they feel miserable, then by all means mope and have a pity party. Then get back on the damn horse or give up. But if the actual writing itself makes you miserable, I would say something is wrong.

 

[T.Allen.Smith]

This is a matter of mindset, in my opinion. When I first started writing in earnest, the process was full of excitement. There was so much I didn't know, discovery lay around every turn.

Like many endeavors, when the real work begins, enthusiasm wanes. Pushing through, I learned how to apply a disciplined approach, how to try and be a professional in my chosen craft. There were still times of inspiration. Frustration or procrastination still visited, but never misery. Why accept misery in a chosen pursuit?

Now, I'm constantly learning how much I still don't know. Every time I write something, I learn another bit of craft (because I experiment or try different methods). Every time I receive comments and critique from others, I see ways to hone my skills, improve on strengths, & discover unknown weaknesses. I'm open to ideas & concepts because I believe exposure can only improve my writing. That's the end goal each time I start something new, getting better so my stories are good. Constant improvement. It's all that matters.

I've been writing for years. If someone points something out to me that can improve my work, I don't get frustrated anymore, I rejoice in the new knowledge & the opportunity to grow.

So again, why be miserable? Be content with opportunities to improve. Allow yourself time to learn & become the writer you want to be.

 

[Chessie]

I love writing, and I suffer when I *don't* get to do it for whatever reason. Since I was a kid, I've always written stories and kept a journal. Writing is my release, my mental time, a spiritual practice. Sure, sometimes its hard because I suck at it. But the way to publication is a journey I'm thoroughly enjoying. I've never met an artist that doesn't love what they are doing, but also struggles at the same time. That's life, and it applies to anything.

 

[Incanus]

I love writing, and I suffer when I *don't* get to do it for whatever reason. Since I was a kid, I've always written stories and kept a journal. Writing is my release, my mental time, a spiritual practice. Sure, sometimes its hard because I suck at it. But the way to publication is a journey I'm thoroughly enjoying. I've never met an artist that doesn't love what they are doing, but also struggles at the same time. That's life, and it applies to anything.

Well said.

And no, I'm not at all miserable when I write. In fact, I find that if I'm really preoccupied with something, or in a terrible mood, I can't write. I have to at least be in a decent mood to write.

But also, I can get antsy not writing too as Chesterama said. I had a good session on Monday night this week, but as things are now, there's no time for writing on Tuesdays, and having to put off writing that extra day was not easy.

I suppose I'm really talking more about the 'struggle' and 'frustration' aspects then.

But back on the other hand: Was E. A. Poe miserable? Not clear on that. How about William Golding? He might have been. If they were, however, their art certainly did not suffer for it. Both these guys were outstanding writers.

 

[Trick]

But back on the other hand: Was E. A. Poe miserable? Not clear on that. How about William Golding? He might have been. If they were, however, their art certainly did not suffer for it. Both these guys were outstanding writers.

In the case of Poe, I have this feeling that he was a depressed, miserable sort of man. Perhaps what today would be called clinically depressed. I doubt writing made that any worse, in fact I'd bet it helped. Some people have depression, some are just debbie downers. Your art should not be the cause of your depression because it is so contradictory to me. Art is release. If you were forced into a kind of art you did not want to do, I could concede there but only in that case.

If I had a publisher who forced me to write My Little Pony stories, I would be miserable.

 

[Incanus]

In the case of Poe, I have this feeling that he was a depressed, miserable sort of man. Perhaps what today would be called clinically depressed. I doubt writing made that any worse, in fact I'd bet it helped. Some people have depression, some are just debbie downers. Your art should not be the cause of your depression because it is so contradictory to me. Art is release. If you were forced into a kind of art you did not want to do, I could concede there but only in that case.

If I had a publisher who forced me to write My Little Pony stories, I would be miserable.

Totally agreed. I'm not an expert on the biographies of famous writers, but just pick up a bit here and there. I think Golding was depressed as well; he was certainly an alcoholic.

But I think you're on to something: If these two--and probably many others--hadn't written, they may very well have ended up passed out in alleyways, or otherwise wasting away somewhere, poor and miserable (more so). For myself, I do believe writing has been helping me 'release' a bit. I think I am a little happier now that I've somehow flung open the door to short-story ideas (which I could never come up with before) and having them come out more or less like I intended.

In any case, I don't mean to defend 'misery', I was just playing the devil's advocate to explore the issue.

 

[The Dark One]

I love writing but trying to get published can be depressing which would then have an impact on further writing; ie, "why on earth do I bother etc"

Writing is also (necessarily) a solitary activity. You spend a lot of time alone, which is depressing for naturally social creatures if you're not getting something in return (ie, an audience).

I now have a (small but enthusiastic) audience, which makes all the years in the lonely garret worthwhile. So I'd suggest that for a writer to be miserable, they are either yet to be published or the sort of person who'd be miserable anyway, no matter what they did.

 

[Jabrosky]

I wouldn't say writing by itself makes me miserable. I like creating things. The stressful part comes in when I have to make those creations palatable to other people. Whenever my inner critic comes in to pester me while I'm writing, it's usually reciting admonitions I've received from previous reviewers or those notorious "writing rules", which in turn reflect popular opinion to some extent.

I don't agree that writing's downside comes from its solitary quality. For me it is the opposite. Writing, since it first developed as a method for relaying information to others, has always been a social activity. You don't know your writing is worth anything until you share it with other people and receive their feedback. Furthermore, given the character-centered nature of most fiction, you do need at least a basic understanding of how people tick in order to create characters that readers will accept. As someone with Asperger's, I find these social aspects of writing can be a great source of frustration.

I've seen it advised that writers and other artists should create whatever they want without investing too much in other people's judgements, in keeping with modern society's individualistic pretensions. When you're on the autism spectrum like me, you constantly receive pressures to the contrary, namely that you have to be constantly cognizant of what everyone else wants. All my life I've been corrected, scolded, derided, or even bullied for not squeezing into society's molds. What I want more than anything else is for the world to accept me as I am instead of demanding that I kowtow to its demands.

But that is never going to happen.

 

[Svrtnsse]

When I was younger, I occasionally wrote a blog/journal about what I did. I found that when I was happy and everything was fine I didn't have much to say and no need to write in the journal. When things got bad though, then I did write - and it felt good.

Back then I didn't write any fiction at all, just recollections of my life. I can very well imagine how writing can be a way of dealing with the hardships of life, especially when you're young and everything's complicated and difficult.

 

[skip.knox]

I have quoted her before, I'll quote her again. Dorothy Parker is infinitely quotable:

"I hate writing. I love having written."

I won't say writing is a misery, but it is a labor. Also, writing is a process. The first draft is probably the most fun for me, but the final edit is the most satisfying. In between it's a combination of joy and misery, varying moment by moment, with long stretches of simple workmanship. I rather think this is much the same as it is with any craft. The early days are filled with high concept and high hopes, while the progress of the work varies greatly. At the end I'm pleased with the accomplishment and apprehensive about the reception.

In short, I would not characterize the whole process of writing with any single emotion, not for me. ymmv, naturally.

 

[Penpilot]

Writing is like any other thing that one is trying to get better at. There will be moments of joy. There will be moments of misery and frustration.

For me, I think it parallels the path of an professional athlete.

You start off and it's all just for fun. No pressure to do anything but play when ever you can. Next, you decide you really like to do this thing and start pouring more time into it, and in the back of your head you think maybe this will lead somewhere. You start to put a little more pressure on yourself to improve. You might even start paying for skills lessons.

When you make strides, it's great, but when you don't it starts to get frustrating, because you're trying now. You're putting your best foot forward and trying to improve your skills, and when you fail, it matters more. It's a reminder that you have limitations on your skills at the moment.

It's easy to play and practice when you're constantly succeeding and making obvious progress. It's a lot harder when you practice and play as hard as you can and don't make progress or succeed as much as you want to. There's a certain level of doubt and frustration that creeps in. This can be made worse if one puts unreasonably high expectations on themselves, like I'm going to have a 100mph fastball by next week OR my first novel will be my magnum opus that will be as good as or nearly as good as Lord of the Rings or A Game of Thrones.

IMHO, this can be a make or break moment for some people when trying to learn a skill with the thought of going somewhere with it. Do you try harder without any assurances that you'll get better or do you just give up, because you're not good enough and never will be? To me, this is also the moment that separates those who really love something from those who just like it.

 

[Ryan_Crown]

Penpilot -- very well put. I never thought about it like that. I know that since I decided it was finally time to stop being a hobby writer and actually try and finish a novel that might someday be publishable, my enjoyment of the writing itself didn't diminish, but the frustration that came with the writing -- pushing myself to write every day, fighting through writer's block, dealing with the self doubt of if what I was doing would ever amount to anything -- went up dramatically. So now I just need to see if I do have what it takes to push through all of that and keep on writing. I am hoping that I do. It's also nice to have a forum like this where you have these discussions, as well as vent your frustrations and get feedback/support from people who've all been there as well.

 

[Philip Overby]

I can't really say the act of writing ever "gets me down" so to speak. I don't really go through any roller coaster of emotions like I used to. Mostly it's just, "Oh, this sucks. Need to fix that" or "I like this part. I need to do more of this."

Sometimes I just wonder if people are more in love with the idea of writing than actually writing. Part of this may be tied into the fact that once you write something people are going to, you know, actually read it (or not read it, depending on the case.) I think what I'm coming across may be apprehension rather than misery. Either "no one will like what I write" or "no one will read what I write." A fear of rejection of some sort must be tied in somehow.

Of course I want people to like my writing, but I understand not everyone is going to. I guess that's why writing doesn't make me miserable anymore. It's just something I do and hope other people enjoy one way or another.

 

[PaulineMRoss]

... I decided it was finally time to stop being a hobby writer and actually try and finish a novel that might someday be publishable, ...

I find this an interesting attitude, and it's one that I know a lot of people have: that there are hobbyists and then there are people who are serious about their art (or craft, or however you define writing).

But you can be a hobbyist and be deadly serious about doing it well. I'm sure we all know people who devote endless time and trouble and patience (and money!) to their hobbies, and turn out brilliant model railway layouts or authentic civil war weaponry for re-enactments or immaculate and/or productive gardens or ingenious new worlds for D&D gamers.

I'm proud to be a hobby writer. It means I do it because I love it, because it's something I choose to do when all the chores and real-life business is done (or sometimes instead of the chores, but let's not mention that). I get a buzz out of exploring this world I've created, and getting to know my characters, and finding out what happens to them. It's exciting to see the story unrolling itself.

To stay vaguely on-topic, I don't get down about it, except maybe when I get a negative critique, for a while, but those are usually the ones that most help me to improve. Well, I get down about endless revisions, which I find both difficult and boring. So I work hard to make sure that I get the first draft as ship-shape as possible, by editing as I go, and remembering snippets of good writing advice as I'm writing, rather than trying to apply them to a finished draft. Not sure that it always works, but it helps.

 

[Guy]

I don't find writing to be miserable. Publishing, now... that becomes its own level of hell.