Consider the following lines:
By now you've probably read it twice and you have a good idea about who's saying what. The question is, how did it feel the first time? When in the reading does it become unclear who's talking? Is it okay to reference back in a following line or is that too late and it's already ruined by confusion?
I guess the following would be better:
“Enar, what do you do on Restday in the city?”
“Linus! You shouldn't talk with your mouth full!”
“Elsie.” A stern word from Linnea stopped further scolding and a harsh glare at Linus shut the boys mouth.
By now you've probably read it twice and you have a good idea about who's saying what. The question is, how did it feel the first time? When in the reading does it become unclear who's talking? Is it okay to reference back in a following line or is that too late and it's already ruined by confusion?
I guess the following would be better:
“Enar," Linus mumbled through his mushrooms, "what do you do on Restday in the city?”
“You shouldn't talk with your mouth full!” Elsie instantly corrected her brother.
“Ahem!” A stern word from Linnea stopped further scolding and a harsh glare at Linus shut the boys mouth.