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I fear I might be considered a liar.

Discussion in 'Writing Discussions' started by Ronald T., Feb 15, 2016.

  1. Ronald T.

    Ronald T. Troubadour

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    First off — none of what you read hear is based on any actual feedback. It’s entirely due to the subtle fears caused by an ever uncertain mind. So please, let me explain how my often demented yet always busy mind works. If nothing else, by the time I’ve finished this post, it’s likely you’ll have concluded one of two things: either I’m telling the truth, or I truly am a pathological liar. In the end, that conclusion is up to you.

    After reading the generous compliments about my determination to read all the threads on this particular forum, it occurred to me last night as I lie awake prior to falling asleep, that it’s very possible for people to think me a liar. The thought kept me awake far longer than I would’ve liked.

    It was still with me when I awoke, and I’m having a bit of trouble shaking it off. At first, I was going to ignore it. But I don’t think that would be beneficial to anyone.

    If I’m thought of as a liar, how can any of you as readers of this forum wish to read anything else I post from here on? And how does it serve me to ignore such a misconception? I don’t think my ego is completely out of control, but I’ll openly admit to having one that can be bruised at times. The sad part is, that bruising is often self-inflicted, just as it might be in this instance.

    Now, I’m going to compound the danger that I might be considered a liar by stating another simple fact: I not only read the entire Mythic Scribes “Writing Questions” forum, I did the same thing at a different site, one created by someone similar to our own inspired leader, Black Dragon. I researched both of these sites at the same time. And I will admit, I was a lot of work.

    But as you get to know me, you’ll find I have no fear of taking on a difficult or long-term challenge if what I want to know or achieve is backed by my strong desire to learn or complete something. I spent more than four years building our dream home, taking no more than three or four days off each year. I did at least 90% of the work myself. So I suppose I should change the term “strong desire” to the more accurate term “fanatical desire”. If you doubt my terminology, you have only to query Jane, my beloved wife of 46 years. I feel quite certain she’ll set your mind at ease.

    I’m sure this is merely a self-serving exercise, and I’ll admit that. I only posted this as a way to sooth my own unmanaged insecurities. But I’ve never believed that turning a blind eye to a real or imagined problem is the best way to deal with it. I’d rather face it straight on — face to face. After that, I can feel secure that I’ve done all I could do, personally.

    I hope I haven’t bored you. If so, I apologize. But, at least now I can move on without my uncertainty festering into something unhealthier than an uncertain mind. And I thank you all for listening.

    As always, my best to you all,

    -- The Hermit in the Woods --
     
  2. Ronald T.

    Ronald T. Troubadour

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    Sorry! I just noticed I can't even spell the word "here". Clearly, this issue bothered me more than I realized. I actually do know the difference.
     
  3. Penpilot

    Penpilot Staff Article Team

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    For me, I found that when interacting in forums, assuming good faith to be a good starting point. So I have no reason to doubt your claims. And I won't doubt them until there is a good reason to doubt them.

    To me, it's like the presumption of innocence in the legal system.

    Though what you did was a pretty amazing feat, it's hardly an impossible task. A little time, a little determination, and I can see it being achieved.

    It's not like you're claiming to have mastered cold fusion using two bottle caps, an old toothbrush, and bellybutton lint. :D
     
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  4. WooHooMan

    WooHooMan Auror

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    I'm going to boldly speak for everyone on this forum and say that no one here really cares if you're a liar or not.
    If you post anything interesting, someone will want to read it regardless of how factual it is.
    In fact, as this is a forum for fantasy fiction writing, I assume very little of what's posted on this site is factual.

    Being worried that people may think you're an egomaniac is a more legit fear but even then, only barely. You need a big ego to be an artist, I think.

    Really, you signing your posts annoys me more than you potentially lying or making forum threads to congratulate yourself. That's a bigger tip off to having an ego.
    Like, the point of forums as oppose to anonymous message boards is that you don't need to sign your posts to let people know you wrote it. That's why, above your avatar, there's a username.

    But yeah, what I'm getting at is that if you fear being thought of poorly, keep quiet.
    That's if you fear of being thought of poorly, which you shouldn't.
    There's nothing wrong with having an ego (is what I often tell myself).

    This is a good way of looking at it. No one is a liar until proven otherwise beyond reasonable doubt.
     
    Last edited: Feb 15, 2016
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  5. ascanius

    ascanius Inkling

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    This is the Internet no one cares, for all I know every one could be a liar. I and I doubt others are going to put the emotional and metal time into worrying if your lying or not. We take the information that is useful to us and apply it to writing. Through the passing of time you slowly get to know certain members that stick around. It's those members that I tend to hold as telling the truth and give a slightly higher weight to their opinions because they have earned it. Your still new so no one cares. It would be different if you have been here for 4 years and then we discover a sinister side but even then I don't know you so it's unimportant.
     
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  6. Devor

    Devor Fiery Keeper of the Hat Moderator

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    Speaking for myself, I took your words at face value. I understand the kind of impulse that can lead someone to read thousands of posts, and it's the sort of characteristic which you sometimes see with people on the internet. Also, you had these confusing posts where you said something like, "I see a lot of members saying such-and-such that I wanted to comment on...." and that suddenly makes sense if you were reading a few thousand old posts.

    Really, though, this isn't something you need to worry about. Unless you fall into a pattern of outrageous-looking claims, nobody cares that much. Nobody thinks you're lying because there's no reason to lie, unless you're a troll, in which case that would show up, again, in some kind of a pattern.
     
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  7. Ronald T.

    Ronald T. Troubadour

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    I appreciate the thoughtful input and I thank you all. It means more to me than you know. I accept that most of you feel it's not that big of a deal. However, for me, trust is a very important aspect in life. And that goes for what I reads as well.

    I suppose that's part of why Jane and I have been married for so long. I trust that she will never cheat on me, just as I would never betray her trust in me. And I trust that when she does something that hurts my feelings or makes me angry, she never does so intentionally. That's something I try to avoid as well. I might be the exception on this issue, but I believe trust is the basis for a strong and lasting friendship or love.

    But your various opinions have been quite helpful. I am deeply relieved to know that I am not as likely to offend as I feared.

    As always, my best to you all.
     
  8. Nimue

    Nimue Auror

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    Not only did I not think you a liar when you said you'd read the entirety of Writing Questions, I wasn't particularly surprised. The way that you've replied to every single person who posts in one of your threads and the length and thoroughness of your posts point to a very methodical sort of person.

    I'd not worry too much. If you stay on the right side of the Internet and try to be a polite person, the incidence of nastiness and accusations is very low.
     
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  9. Demesnedenoir

    Demesnedenoir Istar

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    Your sanity might be questioned more than your verisimilitude, heh heh.
     
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  10. Velka

    Velka Sage

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    This is the internet, so I would hope that everyone who participates in online communities harbours a healthy amount of suspicion. That being said, this is one of the most open, supportive, and constructive writing communities I've found amongst the 1s and 0s online. If you say you read all the posts in this particular forum I believe you, and if it so happens you skimmed over the less interesting and one-response posts because they were not very interesting or enlightening it doesn't diminish the dedication or scope of your enterprise.

    I consider this a generational thing. My father, bless his heart, signs all his texts to me "Love, Dad". Now myself, who is much more on the gen-X than the millennial side of the generational spectrum, silently screams at my phone "I KNOW IT'S YOU, IT SAYS DAD IN THE SENDER THINGY ABOVE OUR ENTIRE TEXT CHAIN!!!", but the more rational and sentimental side of me understands that every text is a mini-letter he writes to me and that's all kinds of awesome.
     
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  11. Russ

    Russ Istar

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    Personally I could care less if you have read all those threads or not.

    Nor do I think we really needed to know how the basis of your relationship with your wife works.

    edit- just for fun I sat down and did the math. It would take more than 30 8 hours days of non-stop reading to get through that many threads if they only took you 5 minutes a thread. You can now colour me skeptical.
     
    Last edited: Feb 16, 2016
  12. UncleanGenes

    UncleanGenes Dreamer

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    For a different view on this: What i find suspicious, is that you claim to have built your house in 16 days??
     
    Last edited: Feb 16, 2016
  13. Mythopoet

    Mythopoet Auror

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    To be honest, when I saw your claim, my first thought was not that you were lying but that you had seriously wasted your time. ;)

    And if you have time to hang around here reading that many threads, I invite you to jump into the open chat and just talk to us instead. :)
     
  14. Ronald T.

    Ronald T. Troubadour

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    Russ -- your reason for skepticism actually made me laugh. I didn't build my house in 16 days. That was the amount of time I took a break from building it. In fact, one year, I didn't take a day off for a solid 10 months.

    I realize it's easy for anyone to feel skepticism when they don't know the kind of person I am. I think I've mentioned that I was a professional artist for a few years. During that time, I did a huge amount of woodcarving -- primarily on large works (many 300 lbs. or more. And they were detailed carvings, some winning the highest award for woodcarving in California. And My point is, I spent more than 500 hundred hours on completing many of them. So the idea of committing myself to a chore of only 250 to 300 hours is nothing compared to some of the projects I've undertaken. I once spent every free hour I could manage over a two year period using a backhoe to dig two miles of ditch across country property so I could install a 6 inch water pipe-line to my property. And I installed every piece of that pipe with my own two hands.

    I'm certain that some might feel a certain amount of skepticism for what I just said. But I can promise you, every word was the truth.

    All I'm trying to say is, taking on a difficult or long-term task has never been a problem for me. I come from a poor family, and I leaned early on, if I want something badly enough, I'd have to do the hard work to get it. And I can promise you, reading all these threads was one of the easier tasks, and far more enjoyable than many chores I've taken on over the years.

    Velka, you might very well be right. It could be a generational thing. I only added these tags as an attempt to amuse and personalize my posts. It's a carry-over from the term my family often uses for me. It was never meant to irritate.

    And one more thing -- Demesnednoir...you are absolute right. My sanity is the larger problem here.

    As always, my best to you all.
     
  15. Russ

    Russ Istar

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    I don't recall mentioning your house. I think you have me confused with someone else...namely UncleanGenes.
     
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  16. Ronald T.

    Ronald T. Troubadour

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    You're absolutely right, Russ. I read the post by UncleanGenes directly after reading your post, and somehow, I foolishly combined the two. You have my sincere apology.
     
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  17. Devor

    Devor Fiery Keeper of the Hat Moderator

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    I look at the stories I want to tell and wish I had that kind of determination to get them there. If you at all have a head for writing this is what will set you apart.
     
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