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Wordy characters

The Din

Troubadour
I have been looking over my work of late and have come to the realization that my POV characters are decidedly wordy for their prospective roles(a gladiator and a cutthroat). I'm not about to rework my whole novel into two syllable words, but I am curious as to how much freedom an author is given when interpreting their character's voices. I myself have them spouting all sorts of convoluted s**t, yet keep their 'voices' nice and gritty.

Relatedly, is it ever ok insert writing terms into your POV. Ie: 'The two fighters took up metaphorical swords and went at each other.' (two children playing with sticks) or: 'A warm glow bathed housewives at their stoves, juxtaposing the turmoil outside.'
 
Try a twist, like a ruthless gladiator who secretly learnt to read, giving him a more diverse vocab even though he's still a gladiator because he has no choice, leading to some regret and inner conflict.
 

Ailith

Minstrel
Relatedly, is it ever ok insert writing terms into your POV. Ie: 'The two fighters took up metaphorical swords and went at each other.' (two children playing with sticks) or: 'A warm glow bathed housewives at their stoves, juxtaposing the turmoil outside.'

I think it's fine to use literary words... BUT don't use them to tell the reader what you're doing with your writing. So instead of explaining that there is a stark juxtaposition, just let the reader see it for themselves. Maybe something like "A warm glow bathed the housewives at their stoves while the turmoil raged outside."
 
Try a twist, like a ruthless gladiator who secretly learnt to read, giving him a more diverse vocab even though he's still a gladiator because he has no choice, leading to some regret and inner conflict.

Exactly what I would have suggested. Intelligent characters are interesting and if they're first person POV, it's hard to write them dumb if you yourself are smart. So make them smart, but make it plausible as Aidan suggested. Readers will always forgive apparent anomalies if you show that you are aware of the anomaly and explain it. They just want to know that you're in control of your own world.
 

Jon_Chong

Scribe
You're the author. The freedom is all yours. Now, if you want people to read your work and like it? That's an entirely different ballgame. Personally, I dislike overly wordy characters as I am an extremely wordy person myself. I speak a lot. In most conversations I tend to speak the most. Whether or not the words that come out of my mouth are of any importance is debatable - extremely in some cases. But I digress. Wordy characters remind me too much of me and I tend to automatically hate them. But what does this mean for you?

It really means one thing. I'll probably hate your MC and this will go with people like me too. They will hate your MC as well. But there will be people who enjoy your MC. Just as there are people like me, there are people who are not like me and they will enjoy the monologues and speeches your MC delivers. And it is these people you should be writing for.

So after a long and wordy speech, my answer to your question is: go nuts. Make him wordy. But! Remember to explain why he loves long sentences. If he has a love for formal speech, why is this the case?
 

Ankari

Hero Breaker
Moderator
I have been looking over my work of late and have come to the realization that my POV characters are decidedly wordy for their prospective roles(a gladiator and a cutthroat). I'm not about to rework my whole novel into two syllable words, but I am curious as to how much freedom an author is given when interpreting their character's voices. I myself have them spouting all sorts of convoluted s**t, yet keep their 'voices' nice and gritty.

Relatedly, is it ever ok insert writing terms into your POV. Ie: 'The two fighters took up metaphorical swords and went at each other.' (two children playing with sticks) or: 'A warm glow bathed housewives at their stoves, juxtaposing the turmoil outside.'

Create a back story for the characters that would explain their intelligence. Gladiators could be slaves or people that couldn't pay a debt. Perhaps, before he became a gladiator, he was a merchant who was educated in writing and speaking. Maybe he was the fourth son of a minor noble who lost everything, which may explain his intelligence and sword skills.

The cutthroat would be a bit harder. Maybe he was once an apprentice to someone (mage, scholar, etc). Perhaps he loved his mentor, or perhaps someone else, but that person is killed because of some intrigue. The would-be scholar then pursues the dark arts to sate his revenge, never returning to his intellectual pursuits.
 

Steerpike

Felis amatus
Moderator
Relatedly, is it ever ok insert writing terms into your POV. Ie: 'The two fighters took up metaphorical swords and went at each other.' (two children playing with sticks) or: 'A warm glow bathed housewives at their stoves, juxtaposing the turmoil outside.'

Yes, this is OK. To me, it depends on how tight a POV you are employing. If it is very tight, then you want to use terminology more in accord with what your characters would use. If you have a more distant POV, then you can use such terms whether they are in-character for your viewpoint characters or not.
 

SeverinR

Vala
I think a lonely gladiator might like to overwhelm the conversation when he isn't killing. I hope he doesn't talk his opponents to death. The common theme of gladiators is quiet, commanding authority, brooding person. But that is only one personality of a vast array of traits a person can have. Only a person raised with a conscience would be concerned with the killing of a opponent, so if raised for the fight, he could be happy and content with his life.
 

The Din

Troubadour
Maybe sophisticated is a better word than wordy. My characters are the silent type, more or less. What I mean to ask is if having the prose full of complicated language, yet still close third person is acceptable. (I keep their dialogue simple-ish) And both were born into their prospective lives.
 

Jon_Chong

Scribe
Oh. That's a bit tricky. If it is description that is not attached to any character, then it's normally fine. For example, a pretty girl walks into the room. If you're describing her from the POV of the gladiator and you break out words like ephemeral and transcendent beauty, you had best be explaining why your barbarian is using such words - even if the girl is indeed a transcendent beauty. But if it is like the examples you gave above, it should be no problem... usually.
 

Penpilot

Staff
Article Team
Maybe sophisticated is a better word than wordy. My characters are the silent type, more or less. What I mean to ask is if having the prose full of complicated language, yet still close third person is acceptable. (I keep their dialogue simple-ish) And both were born into their prospective lives.

Hmm... I think that could be a problem if you're going for close third. The prose is supposed to be filtered through the lens of the character. The prose also presents an image of the POV character, so if it's sophisticated, it gives the impression of a sophisticated character. Describing something as 'totally awesome' vs 'most exhilarating' paints a different picture. If you use a distant third, and the narrator takes on a voice, it wouldn't be a problem. That's my thinking any way.
 
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