Hello there! I’m a newbie here, so here are some details about my fantasy planet! Hope you have some suggestions!

[thatoneguywho-]

So, the planets name Is ‘Turianuyani’, and it WAS four times as large as Earth. Before the invasions of the abyss, that is. The abyss, or the other world, As it is universally named, is a dark, evil realm that is home to the goddess of death, Abailemjikulo. the goddess of death harbors a deep grudge against humans, and has attempted to to destroy them six times at the beginning of the main story. each time, however, she is beaton back into the abyss, and the portal to it is temporarily sealed. But each time, she also takes a chunk of the planet with her, casting it off into space. Now, the ‘planet’ is ten large pieces of land floating there, completely stagnant. They are held there by a combination of gravity from something in the middle, though it is unknown what that is(LOREEEEE)m and other cosmic bodies. Six moon surround the planet, and thats what I’ll say for now!

well?


any suggestions?


come on…

please?

 

[Genly]

Wow, quite a setting...

I am assuming from your description that the chunks of planet are all clustered together in some fashion. If they are, then you might want to think about some additional forces (magic?) that hold this planetary system in place. Relying on gravity alone to hold it together would be pretty difficult, as the orbits would probably be unstable and would end up with the bits of the planet crashing into each other.

The same issue would be faced if the planetary chunks were to retain atmospheres of their own. Just relying on physics probably wouldn't work, as the atmospheres of the chunks might escape or be blasted away by the cataclysmic events that formed them. A scientist living on one of the chunks might start to speculate along these lines. He/she might ask: what greater force is keeping us all alive? Because it sure isn't physics. Does the goddess of death have a secret, powerful opponent?

 

[ThinkerX]

A fragmented planet with survivors does pop up now and again in fantasy. A common goal in the books is to stabilize or reassemble the pieces.

That said, the names have an animae feel to them, which is beyond my area of knowledge. I will point out, though, that many readers find longer names confusing.

 

[thatoneguywho-]

Wow, quite a setting...

I am assuming from your description that the chunks of planet are all clustered together in some fashion. If they are, then you might want to think about some additional forces (magic?) that hold this planetary system in place. Relying on gravity alone to hold it together would be pretty difficult, as the orbits would probably be unstable and would end up with the bits of the planet crashing into each other.

The same issue would be faced if the planetary chunks were to retain atmospheres of their own. Just relying on physics probably wouldn't work, as the atmospheres of the chunks might escape or be blasted away by the cataclysmic events that formed them. A scientist living on one of the chunks might start to speculate along these lines. He/she might ask: what greater force is keeping us all alive? Because it sure isn't physics. Does the goddess of death have a secret, powerful opponent?

actually, the object in middle has more than gravity, and is covered in magic! And it’s a stagnant magical fantasy world, so scientists are simple old geezers. oh, and yes the goddess of death does have that. Multiple.

 

[thatoneguywho-]

A fragmented planet with survivors does pop up now and again in fantasy. A common goal in the books is to stabilize or reassemble the pieces.

That said, the names have an animae feel to them, which is beyond my area of knowledge. I will point out, though, that many readers find longer names confusing.

Aww, you guessed the end goal (totally, Im not lying…) anyways, I Don’t want my world to be way too much like earth, so they have a different culture that names things differently. And though I do like those Japanese film things, no, the names weren’t inspired by that.

 

[pmmg]

I kind of think, that if that was really the planets name, over time it would get shortened to something more manageable, like just Turan.

I don't know, can a fragmented planet even survive? I suppose I should not really ask that, but...how would oceans and precipitation work?

Six times they have beaten the goddess back, and six times she came back and ripped the planet up more? I think I would look to move to a different planet.

I think its a cool enough concept so long as I don't dive too deep with the questions. What opposes the goddess? are their other gods who would want to prevent her from doing whatever it is she is trying to do?

 

[thatoneguywho-]

I kind of think, that if that was really the planets name, over time it would get shortened to something more manageable, like just Turan.

I don't know, can a fragmented planet even survive? I suppose I should not really ask that, but...how would oceans and precipitation work?

Six times they have beaten the goddess back, and six times she came back and ripped the planet up more? I think I would look to move to a different planet.

I think its a cool enough concept so long as I don't dive too deep with the questions. What opposes the goddess? are their other gods who would want to prevent her from doing whatever it is she is trying to do?

1. I honestly never thought of that.

2. uhhhhh I’ll think about that….

3. so, each continent(fragment, there are ten) has a divine guardian to combat the goddess of death..

other. She has some divinities on her side, but most are against her.

 

[AnnaGoeldi]

I like your premise. A few short remarks: If I can't pronounce names easily in my head, it's annoying and might even prompt me to NOT read an otherwise good book based on this annoyance. Your goddess of deaths' name is unrememberable for me, even if I read your post two times.
Also, I feel like a "grudge" is too weak of a motivation for your goddess od death, because her fight is not easily won and she tries over and over again regardless. What does she crave - revenge? Power?

 

[TheCrystallineEntity]

Since deities of death tend to get a bad rap more often than not, changing the goddess' domain into life instead could make for more interesting storylines and character dynamics. [You're under no obligation to change anything, mind. I'm the type of writer who's always asking 'but what if.....?', and have a tendency towards asking too many questions. I agree with the above points about names, and will add that sounding out your fantasy names out loud to determine if they're even pronounceable, or if they 'feel good' to say, can help a lot. I feel sorry for all the audiobook narrators who have to struggle through nigh-unpronounceable names. ]

 

[thatoneguywho-]

I like your premise. A few short remarks: If I can't pronounce names easily in my head, it's annoying and might even prompt me to NOT read an otherwise good book based on this annoyance. Your goddess of deaths' name is unrememberable for me, even if I read your post two times.
Also, I feel like a "grudge" is too weak of a motivation for your goddess od death, because her fight is not easily won and she tries over and over again regardless. What does she crave - revenge? Power?

for my fantasy world, 'Abailemjikulo' (uh-bye-lum(ber)-g-col(d)-oh) is a really ancient name from a culture that loves long names, so yea. also they tend to just say 'Abai." the grudge thing is fake lol there is a much darker reason.

 

[thatoneguywho-]

Since deities of death tend to get a bad rap more often than not, changing the goddess' domain into life instead could make for more interesting storylines and character dynamics. [You're under no obligation to change anything, mind. I'm the type of writer who's always asking 'but what if.....?', and have a tendency towards asking too many questions. I agree with the above points about names, and will add that sounding out your fantasy names out loud to determine if they're even pronounceable, or if they 'feel good' to say, can help a lot. I feel sorry for all the audiobook narrators who have to struggle through nigh-unpronounceable names. ]

she isn't really the goddess of 'death' TBH, thats just what humanity thinks, with their biased opinions.

 

[AnnaGoeldi]

for my fantasy world, 'Abailemjikulo' (uh-bye-lum(ber)-g-col(d)-oh) is a really ancient name from a culture that loves long names, so yea. also they tend to just say 'Abai." the grudge thing is fake lol there is a much darker reason.

Thank you for your reply - if you work with abbreviations this will help a ton . And I'm intrigued to know the darker reason - not now, but when you've finished . Wish you tons of motivation!

 

[Gurkhal]

I also think that you may want to make names a bit shorter or more "local friendly" for your intended audience.

An English or English-like name will be easy to remember for Anglophone readers. But try the same with a French-like names for those Anglophone readers. Their heads will spin after ten or fifteen such names in you story. And actual Francophones may laugh at it if you don't actually know French sufficiently well.

I've decided to try to limit myself to names either directly from or relatively close to my native language as that make it easier to work with them for my sake and the sake of my readers.

 

[thatoneguywho-]

I also think that you may want to make names a bit shorter or more "local friendly" for your intended audience.

An English or English-like name will be easy to remember for Anglophone readers. But try the same with a French-like names for those Anglophone readers. Their heads will spin after ten or fifteen such names in you story. And actual Francophones may laugh at it if you don't actually know French sufficiently well.

I've decided to try to limit myself to names either directly from or relatively close to my native language as that make it easier to work with them for my sake and the sake of my readers.

bro this is like 6 months old- anyway, this is an entirely different world. btw, I already simplified the names lol. the names you see are my concept of English translations of them.

 

[Gurkhal]

In my defense I was a bit tired at the time of posting. But thanks for replying to my, unintended, necromantic ritual.

 

[thatoneguywho-]

In my defense I was a bit tired at the time of posting. But thanks for replying to my, unintended, necromantic ritual.

im never not gonna reply tbh

 

[thatoneguywho-]

In my defense I was a bit tired at the time of posting. But thanks for replying to my, unintended, necromantic ritual.

completely random to the point of no return after months of deep silence, but if I translate a name like 'jack' into my fantasy world it would come out as something like 'jaharkou' (after simplifications to make it English)




among other versions of the same name.