1. Welcome to the Fantasy Writing Forums. Register Now to join us.

Help please, all caps for intensity :) :(

Discussion in 'Writing Discussions' started by DassaultMirage, Aug 13, 2013.

  1. DassaultMirage

    DassaultMirage Minstrel

    I have this dilemma I seriously should have seen from the beginning of the story.

    The story is set in the world where Erelims (The Valiant Ones - Jewish/Christian religions) and Fallens (Fallens, duh) are forbidden to return and wage war to earth, by a force known as Ein Sof (The divine origin of all existence). Now, the Fallens mated with humans to produce hybrids called Nephilims, and as such, the Erelims left humans with their magic (with those who use them being called practitioners).

    Here's the deal. 100 years ago, the Nephilim Empire of Vlad was finally defeated by the Holy Alliance, and since then, the human practitioners turned towards each other. A group of practitioners that spans all countries (I based this on The Order of The White Lotus from the Avatar Universe) unlocked a way to unlock even more power from the Erelims. This group (or at least majority of it) swore to use their even greater power to check the balance of power in the world, hence their name, Order of Damocles (With Damocles being a sword hanging by a thread above a king's head). The only way for a human to be a Damocles is to be deemed worthy by the rest of the order.

    Now, blablabla, blablabla. My problem is this.

    The lead character is a Damocles (his mother implanted upon him the arcane blueprints of her seven spells which are based on the seven sins), and as such, he is a strategic weapon. I am now writing a scene where he goes to battle against a Nephilim. The battle will take place right in his hometown, and with his power, he will end up doing more death and destruction to his own home than the Nephilim will. If I make him weaker, the point of him being a Damocles is moot. If I don't, that is a moral paradox that I don't think I can overcome.

    The solution I thought of is give him his own set of spells since his seven spells are originally from his mom, but with this option , I will end up making a character, too powerful to begin with, even more powerful, making him perfect and impossible to relate with.

    I will appreciate any opinion :D
    Last edited: Aug 13, 2013
  2. Caged Maiden

    Caged Maiden Staff Article Team

    I too, am struggling with a scene. I'll tell you my predicament and my solution and see whether it helps you...

    I wrote myself into a corner. I have a scene where two guys are going to go after this nobleman and interrogate him, maybe kill him because he's getting up in their business and causing them political problems. The way it originally went down, the MC breaks into the nobleman's house and kills him. But now, my desire is to have important information come out instead.

    So... I have to take it back down to my goals. What NEEDS to happen? Well:
    1). I need the nobleman to reveal who he really is.
    2). I need the two MCs to disagree, one wanting to kill the nobleman, the other refusing to kill him because he's too important.
    3). The nobleman to disclose certain information, "buying" their mercy.

    Now, do I need them to kidnap him to get those goals realized? no.

    Do I need them to break into his house at night? no.

    So how best to rewrite this scene so it makes sense, does the job I need it to, and is interesting for reader? I have no idea. :)

    I'd suggest doing a similar process to your scene. (I can't do yours because I don't know anything about it).

    Ask yourself a bunch of "why" and "what if" questions.

    What if MC suddenly loses his magic?
    What if MC has his mother's spells and his own?
    What if MC accidentally destroys his hometown?
    Why does MC have to fight this antagonist?
    What if he refuses?
    Why does MC have to be there when the antagonist arrives?

    I bet you can come up with twenty or thirty better questions than I did, but that's why I gave you an example from a story I'm familiar with. Write some questions, even if they sound stupid. Answer them and see whether your answers raise new questions. Often, just by asking silly questions, you can find a good solution. Wish I had my ahamoment for my scene, it's killing me, but I hope my process for reworking tricky scenes works for you.

    Write your goals first, the things you NEED to happen. Then, ask a bunch of ridiculous and important questions, to get your brain working on it. When you come up with some viable solutions, see which most support your goal for the scene, and run with them. If you're worried about the relatability of the character, give him a flaw, a moral dilemma during that scene, or something to otherwise humble him.
  3. DassaultMirage

    DassaultMirage Minstrel

    Thanks. The term I came to would be to allow the MC to tame the spells down to tactical level.

Share This Page