Magic and World Dissconected

[Michael K. Eidson]

Howdy! So, I've been working on my new novel as of late, and I've put aside everything else to zone in on it, so I haven't been active. But in this process, I've come across something that worries me. My Elemental magic system was designed with an emphasis on combat, which is all fine and dandy. The issue is that I want to expand the magic into all aspects of society, as there are massive portions of the story without combat.

I've started the Stormlight Archives series recently, and I am impressed with how the "fantasy" seems to radiate across all parts of the world. I want to do something like that. So far it feels like I'm just writing a faux-historical novel, because I find it hard to integrate those "fantasy" elements that are dear to me.

Everything feels too mundane, but I worry that if I try integrating more "fantasy" I'll end up with a bunch of half-baked worldbuilding concepts that seem out of place in my setting. Should I change something now, or wait till revision?

Any tips or a nice dose of sympathy would be good! [emoji106]

Think about how someone, anyone, could make money from the magic or its effects, or make products that are in some way related to the magic or its effects. If the magic can be harnessed in some way, or the byproducts of magic-working captured and sold, then someone, not necessarily those who work the original magic, might be looking to profit from it.

 

[Netardapope]

Hi Net,

Sorry, as a reader I won't buy that. Essentially you're saying that one person is two people who don't really have any connection - which ultimately means they are two different people. And your terminology just makes this fuzzy. When you say a person connects with himself, I would have initially said that you meant something new agey like a person getting in touch with himself. But this is clearly not what you're saying. You're saying there are two different people in two different realms and they're actually talking to one another - mentally or otherwise.

I really think this concept needs work, and you absolutely have to use precise language, not new agey words that don't really marry up with your scenario. It just confuses me.

Dump the "astral projection" for a start. What you are describing is not that. It is a separate entity in astral space with which you wizard can have contact. So for example if your wizard was named Greg, you could call the other one, astral Greg!

Cheers, Greg.

Well, I suppose a good comparison is the conept of a soul. The Astral "Projection" (name tentative) is a person's soul, which exists in the other reality of the Astral Realm. Don't know if that helps.

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[FifthView]

Come to think of it, you have a point. Do you think Astral "Body" would be less confusing?

I'm a little unclear as to how you'll be using the word (whichever word) within the story.

Is this a word the characters will themselves use, or is it something you've been using yourself as you think about the story and that an omniscient narrator might use?

I'd suggest maybe experimenting with a short scene in which a Siphoner is explaining his use of magic to either a non-Siphoner or maybe a new apprentice Siphoner. How would that go?

"Master, I don't understand what you mean."

"Your abilities are weak because you haven't yet fully connected with your Astral Body. You must focus, seek it out, and form the connection. You must hold that connection while you siphon."

"My body? My body's right here!" The boy waved his arms in frustration. "You've said that before, and I still don't understand!"​

—Is this how it would go?

I don't know the type of milieu you are using, so I can't really have a solid opinion on which word would best fit it.

For instance, "projection" has a fairly modern feel for me. I just looked up the etymology, and the word seems to have appeared in the early renaissance as a name for a supposed alchemical process—one cast a powder at a molten metal hoping to transmute that metal. That came from the word "project" which appeared around 1400, to mean plans, schemes, from Latin for "something thrown forth." So maybe the word could work in your world, depending on how you described it; but it still raises the question of what is being thrown forth if the astral projection/body is already on the astral plane. And, it has strong modern connotations that might be out of place in your world.

If it were me, I'd be tempted to create a new word, something like this:

"Master, I don't understand what you mean."

"Your abilities are weak because you haven't yet fully connected with your ka. You must focus, seek it out, and form the connection. You must hold that connection while you siphon."

"My...ka?" The boy's face was a mask of confusion.

Davrom felt his own face must have shown incredulity at that moment. Had no one explained ka to this boy before today?

Davrom cleared his throat, tried to right himself. "Well—yes. Your ka...When Siphoners are born, they are born with a ka—an astral body that is different than their physical body. In the womb, these two bodies are joined. But when the babe leaves the womb, the ka separates itself and travels to the Astral Plane."

The boy thought about that for a moment. "Only Siphoners are born with a ka?"

The master harrumphed. "Yes. Some practitioners believe otherwise; they say that everyone is born with a ka but only Siphoners are able to find their ka and form the connection. This, however, is a lie."​

—and so forth.

So I'd just experiment by using a test scene like this, work it several ways, and see what works best for you. There are potentially other terms that might work better; grab a thesaurus. Plus, your characters might or might not understand precisely what happens when they Siphon—and maybe even different cultures within your world would have different ways of explaining it?

Edit: In an experiment like this, an apprentice reacting with confusion, doubt, incredulity, scorn, etc., can be a stand-in for the reader, helping you to explore your ideas. What about the terms or ideas could cause problems for a reader? How could you go about clarifying your ideas for the reader, tying them together in a sensible way within your world and story?

 

[Netardapope]

I'm a little unclear as to how you'll be using the word (whichever word) within the story.

Is this a word the characters will themselves use, or is it something you've been using yourself as you think about the story and that an omniscient narrator might use?

I'd suggest maybe experimenting with a short scene in which a Siphoner is explaining his use of magic to either a non-Siphoner or maybe a new apprentice Siphoner. How would that go?

"Master, I don't understand what you mean."

"Your abilities are weak because you haven't yet fully connected with your Astral Body. You must focus, seek it out, and form the connection. You must hold that connection while you siphon."

"My body? My body's right here!" The boy waved his arms in frustration. "You've said that before, and I still don't understand!"​

–Is this how it would go?

I don't know the type of milieu you are using, so I can't really have a solid opinion on which word would best fit it.

For instance, "projection" has a fairly modern feel for me. I just looked up the etymology, and the word seems to have appeared in the early renaissance as a name for a supposed alchemical process–one cast a powder at a molten metal hoping to transmute that metal. That came from the word "project" which appeared around 1400, to mean plans, schemes, from Latin for "something thrown forth." So maybe the word could work in your world, depending on how you described it; but it still raises the question of what is being thrown forth if the astral projection/body is already on the astral plane. And, it has strong modern connotations that might be out of place in your world.

If it were me, I'd be tempted to create a new word, something like this:

"Master, I don't understand what you mean."

"Your abilities are weak because you haven't yet fully connected with your ka. You must focus, seek it out, and form the connection. You must hold that connection while you siphon."

"My...ka?" The boy's face was a mask of confusion.

Davrom felt his own face must have shown incredulity at that moment. Had no one explained ka to this boy before today?

Davrom cleared his throat, tried to right himself. "Well–yes. Your ka...When Siphoners are born, they are born with a ka–an astral body that is different than their physical body. In the womb, these two bodies are joined. But when the babe leaves the womb, the ka separates itself and travels to the Astral Plane."

The boy thought about that for a moment. "Only Siphoners are born with a ka?"

The master harrumphed. "Yes. Some practitioners believe otherwise; they say that everyone is born with a ka but only Siphoners are able to find their ka and form the connection. This, however, is a lie."​

–and so forth.

So I'd just experiment by using a test scene like this, work it several ways, and see what works best for you. There are potentially other terms that might work better; grab a thesaurus. Plus, your characters might or might not understand precisely what happens when they Siphon–and maybe even different cultures within your world would have different ways of explaining it?

Edit: In an experiment like this, an apprentice reacting with confusion, doubt, incredulity, scorn, etc., can be a stand-in for the reader, helping you to explore your ideas. What about the terms or ideas could cause problems for a reader? How could you go about clarifying your ideas for the reader, tying them together in a sensible way within your world and story?

Thanks! I have a chapter were I go in deoth into the system, but that'll be the first of many chapters. As for fitting the term "Proection" into the story, my world's technological capicity is that of the mid to late 15th century, so it should be fine. I guess it really is something thatcan only be understood in the context of the story.

Sent from my SM-J700M using Tapatalk

 

[FifthView]

Thanks! I have a chapter were I go in deoth into the system, but that'll be the first of many chapters. As for fitting the term "Proection" into the story, my world's technological capicity is that of the mid to late 15th century, so it should be fine. I guess it really is something thatcan only be understood in the context of the story.

I thought the origin of the word/idea "projection" was intriguing, possibly inspirational, but didn't mean to suggest that the word could only be used in a society set in a similar type of technological era.

I do think that astral projection is a viable idea, but it may bring automatic associations with a modern understanding, and this could trip up readers (as exemplified by some commentary in this thread.) Context and execution can rework just about anything, however, and beta reader feedback or editorial feedback may help you to isolate any problems with that.

 

[skip.knox]

Another possibility: keep projection but lose astral. I'd suggest Soul Projection, but that sounds too much like a 70s R&B band. Maybe you don't need an adjective at all. It's just projection. Or, to set it apart, capitalize the word. And if you need the ordinary noun for a sentence, choose a synonym. Make the magical projection clear from context.

To me, this sounds more like connection than projection. You could still look around for synonyms. Personally I find -tion words a bit modern and ungainly. Right up there with -ism. But don't mind me; it's a personal problem.