Time and Timing

[spectre]

Hey guys, I'm finally settling in to write chapter 2 of my WIP after over a year (just too much going on). I wanted to get some feedback on a timing issues. I open the chapter with some individuals readying themselves to leave, originally I had planned for this part to be more involved and I'm not sure it wouldn't be better, but I decided against that. Instead, it's a short part of the very beginnings of the chapter and immediately after I am referencing other individuals who are part of the same party but due to waking up late, lol, they are hours behind the rest of the party. The transition tis sudden though, but I feel like the first part of the beginning of the chapter is too short to merrit it's own break in the chapter and then I can refer back to the second group members. The entire chapter either can be resolved or will have to face a major rewrite, it's only 5 pages thank God but do you think that timing is wierd? Let me say it again, the beginning is a page and then I change pov to the second group who is now hours behind and will be catching up to the first group, where I will have to change pov again. Of course there are some good parts to go in there alternative to another version of the chapter. The purpose of doing so was character building.

 

[Rick]

Simple is better I think. Start with the group playing catch up and reduce the number of of POV changes. If the beginning group bit is just a page it can be cut (when in doubt, cut). You can always find place for character building later.

 

[Miskatonic]

I wouldn't introduce too many characters in the first chapter. If one group is trying to catch up to the other then a separate chapter for that sounds better than trying to cram it all into one.

 

[FifthView]

Might be more interesting to just start with the second group, who are behind in schedule. That's automatic tension, and an automatic goal–Late! Gotta get there!–and you can always have that second group thinking about or discussing the members who are not late, wondering/worrying how they'll react to having to wait for them–so it's like a double introduction, even if the one group is introduced only in the thoughts of the second group.

 

[spectre]

I thought about this yet in this particular version tension is built in the first group that the second can't build for lack of omnipotence. I do like either version of the chapter though. No, I think you're right. Dump the first group build on the late tension.

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