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Untitled Story its a gnome story

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Starrynight

Dreamer
I have need of wording on this story and how to build this magical world where the Gnome Lord Savron lives. Typed below is what I have so far for it. What I need help on along with some grammar help think I have the spelling errors corrected. Again I am sorry for all the errors in one other post I have Aquaman Legend of a King. I think it willl be a great story I'll edit it and work on it then repost it. :)

If there any errors that you find in this one let me know and I'll edit the post and re post it with corrections. Thanks to you all for your help and kindness. :D




Gnome Story




Deep with in a lush green forest a pair of small eyes watches various animals pass by him. In a world hidden in the shadows cloaked by magic from the eyes of man this figure continues watching the squirrels. From his hiding place the figure laughs heartedly as the two squares' fighting over an acorn.

"You two should know better than to fight over food.” The small figure says emerging from the branch he was sting on hidden by dark green leaves.

"What do you mean I needed that acorn I'm hungry.” The smaller squirrel says as the bigger one leaves with his prize.

Slowly the gnome floats down from the high tree branch perch he was watching them from. A few leaves following him down as he floats towards the squirrel. "You know food has been scarce I couldn't help it.”

Reaching the ground the gnome says, "I know it has been hard for you to find food. One must wait for good things to come. As my grandfather used to say good things come to those who wait.” He says as a bundle of acorns appears before him.

"Oh thank you Lord Savron.”

"Your welcome take them and run along now and no more brawling.”

"I'll try not to.” The squirrel says leaving with the bundle of acorns in tow.

Walking along the forest Lord Savron is dressed in his finest clothes a white shirt almost seams to glow in the sunlight. Along with his black suit a cloak around him a decorated golden clasp showing his families coat of arms. His short dark brown hair and deep dark blue eyes muscular fame make him all the more handsome.

Wandering around the village he sees the houses line the streets candles lit in the windows for a bit of extra light. The roofs of houses all made from leaves and sturdy branches to keep the rains out and winds at bay.

"Good morning Lord Savron.” A lady gnome says greeting him as she comes away from one of the open market merchants carts.

"Good Morning Lady Alristo well it's more afternoon now since it is now past noon.” Lord Savron says looking at his pocket watch.

"Yes it is Lord Savron and how are you this fine day?”

"I am fine thank you and how are you Lady Alristo?”

"I'm great glad to see it's turning to spring again winter was far too long.”

"Indeed it was.”

"Lord Savron you're a handsome gnome you need a good wife.”

"Someday for now I am content with my life. I am still learning my magic to it has been a great learning experience sometimes a bit embarrassing especially when I accidentally turned my best friend into a toad.” Lord Savron says trying to change the subject.

Respectively they part ways, "I'll see you tomorrow Lord Savron take care now.” Lady Alristo says leaving.

Going deeper into the forest finally "Finally I am alone and away from everyone.” he says closes his eyes mentally looking out over the forest. As he does Thousands of images rush his mind. One in particular catches his minds eye.

Focusing on it the images become clear, "What?” he says as he focuses on the image he sees a lady being chased by a man on a horse as she franticly tries to get away from him.

"Please let me go I am of no further use to you. I have done all that you have asked my loyalty as a servant should grant me my freedom.” The Lady shouts in panic.

"Never your mine I bought you fair and square from the family I bought you from. You're my servant freedom shall never be yours.” His slurry voice bellows.

Trying to get away from him sprinting as fast as she can her feet stumbling over a tree root falling, she hurts her ankle crying out in pain as she falls.

"Help me someone help me!” She screams.

Focusing his energy he finds her and tapping into his own magic Lord Savron is able to help her.

"Wha? Where didja go?” He asks his voice slurred and confused as he looks around for her. Not finding her and searching the surrounding area he finds no trace of her he mounts his horse ridding away.

"Well you were lucky to escape me but if you are seen again I'll have you dragged back to the house by your long hair!” He shouts ridding off into the distance.

"He was standing right in front of me and he didn't see me but how?” She says in amazement.

"It's because I was able to help you.” A voice calls to her from a distance

"Who said that?”

"Don't be startled I mean you no harm I sensed your situation that you were in trouble you wanted to be free so I have set you free milady.”

"I believe you thank you sir who are you?” Apprehensive in her tone asking her mysterious rescuer.

"I prefer not to be seen but you are most welcome. Without a harsh master treating you badly you're the master of your own life now.”

"I understand if you wish to remain anonymous then I will respect that.”

"Come back here anytime milady to talk with me anytime you wish simply calls my name aloud and I will hear you. You won't ever see but I will always be there.”

"What is your name?”

"I am Lord Savron.”

"A nobleman.” She says bowing.

"There is no need to bow to me I am of noble rank but I see everyone around me as an equal not my inferiors.”

"Thank you for your kind words they do me great honor Lord Savron.”

"Your very welcome it's late I should be going home. I have no real home so I need to rent a room in town for the night until I can find a place of my own.”

"What is your name milady?”

"I am Terragon.”

"You have a very beautiful name.”

"Thank you again for helping me Lord Savron.”

"Wait Terragon?”

"Yes?”

"Take this consider it a gift for you to start a new life with.” Lord Savron says as a bag of coins is tossed to her.

"It's too much I couldn't possibly accept this.”

"It's alright Terragon take it please it will help you create a new life for yourself.”

"Thank you I am in your debt.”

"Your not milady Terragon your kind heart and timeless inner beauty speak for themselves.”

Slowly Terragon gets up steadying herself on her feet stumbling a bit she finds her balance. Walking towards town soon finding people willing to help her with anything she need. One helps her find a home but still she wonders if they truly like her for herself or if they only like her because of her new found wealth.

With a manor house on the edge of town a few miles away Terragon settles into her new home. Enjoying the fact that she has a home with her new found freedom and title. She still remains kind to her servants and treats them like people and not property. Knowing all too well how awful it was to be treated like a sub human.



After a few days of getting settled in Terragon puts on a simple dress and sprints towards the clearing where she first meet Lord Savron. Arriving at the clearing she calls for Lord Savron, "Lord Savron, Lord Savron are you there?”

"Yes I am here milady Terragon it's been a while how are you?”

"I know it has been a while I'm sorry it's been so long. I should have come sooner but I have been busy getting settled into my new home.”

"I saw a little, I mean I saw your home from a distance I wasn't spying on you or anything. I waned to see you were safe to ensure that man who chased you wouldn't come after you.”

"It's alright I trust you Lord Savron I can tell you're an honorable lord.”

"Enjoying your new home and freedom?”

"Very much so it's so wonderful to be free it's such a pleasure to run my own home and as you said to the master of my own life.”

"Do you horseback ride?” Lord Savron asks as he had seen a stable from his hiding place while watching over her.

"Yes my horse is called Sunny Jo.”

"That is a very cheerful name.”

"She is a beautiful horse white and brown colored.”

"The horse sounds very beautiful and unique.”

"Thanks to you I have the life I have always dreamed of having thank you Lord Savron.”

"I am glad you are so happy milady Terragon Anything I can get for you or do for you?”

"You have done so much for me already the kindness you show me is overwhelming.”

"I am so happy for you I should be going take care in going home. You should be going to Terragon.”


"Can I ask you something?”

"Yes milady I can refuse you nothing.”

"I know you won't let me see you but can you tell me what you look like?”

"I am of noble rank but my title doesn't define who I am it's the kindness of my heart that defines me. The title is sometng I only inherited from my family.”

"Your personality speaks what you say in volumes. But what do you look like? I only ask as I am curious.”


I come asking for help on writing as I want to be an even better writer and it's been a long time since I have truly gotten great feeback on stories. You are all great people and I trust you all. I have been in the past shy about my writing I have always kept it to myself for a long time. Thank you to you all for your help and kindness it means alot.

Starrynight:cool:
 
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Starrynight

Dreamer
I wasn't sure if it belonged in the showcase or not I'll put it there now. Sorry I posted in the wrong place. Also I like your avatar very cool.
 
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