Elven Creation Myth

[Azaraiha]

Auriel and Virtheon

Before the creation of the world of Astalias, there was the Void. The Void was a realm of nothingness. Despite this, the Void was home to twin Spirits: Virtheon, and his sister, Auriel. As the eons passed, both brother and sister felt a emptiness in their hearts. Virtheon, the brother of Auriel, meditated on this and decided to create a realm for himself to try to fill the emptiness he felt. He created a barrier between the void and his creation. Using a barrier between the two realms, Virtheon created the Aether, place that magic originates and Arcanists call upon to cast magic.

Next, Virtheon created the celestial bodies: the Stars, moon and sun. Satisfied, Virtheon molded the planet of Astalias, it's oceans, continents, climates, geography and weather. Still feeling the emptiness within, he created the beasts of the air, and the sea and the land. Yet, the emptiness remained.

Taking on a corporeal form, Virtheon walked through the place he created. And singing the Song of Life, created the first mortals: the elves. Upon hearing the song of his children, Virtheon was filled with pride, the emptiness in his heart was filled.

Auriel's Jealousy and the origin of Sin

As Virtheon created his children, first the elves then men, Auriel grew jealous of her brother. He had learned to fill the emptiness of his heart. One day, Auriel kneeled before the throne of Virtheon, the Father of Creation with poison in her heart.

"My Brother, Virtheon, Let us walk among that which you have created so that I may learn to be fulfilled as you have." Said Auriel. Not sensing the poison in her heart, Virtheon agreed. And so brother and sister descended to the place Virtheon created. Auriel, through her jealousy, killed her brother. Virtheon's soul, exploded and began to fade. However, unbeknownst to Auriel, a fragment of Virtheon's soul fell to his creation, tainted by betrayal corrupted the land where it fell.

Auriel, filled with grief at what she had done, began to weep. Rain fell upon creation for an age. Virtheon's children, mourning the death of their Creator, named Auriel the Lady of Sorrow, for sin had entered the world.



Thoughts? Please feel free to critique.

 

[WooHooMan]

I’m going to be totally honest and sorry if this seems harsh or dismissive. While I understand the precedence for these conventions, I get very bored of seeing in-universe creation myths beginning with a void followed by deities popping into existence then creation coming from boredom (more or less) and culminating in a fight between god-siblings.
In short: I think you need more of a gimmick.

 

[Azaraiha]

I’m going to be totally honest and sorry if this seems harsh or dismissive. While I understand the precedence for these conventions, I get very bored of seeing in-universe creation myths beginning with a void followed by deities popping into existence then creation coming from boredom (more or less) and culminating in a fight between god-siblings.
In short: I think you need more of a gimmick.

I'm open to suggestions. What kind of gimmick do you think would work?

 

[skip.knox]

Consider asking yourself what in the material you have so far drives or affects the story you are writing. I take WooHooMan's point, but I'll care about the creation myth if and only if it matters to one or more characters, and you've made me care about those characters. It doesn't necessarily have to be a gimmick; it just has to matter to someone.

 

[WooHooMan]

I'm open to suggestions. What kind of gimmick do you think would work?

Just of the top of my head: maybe the siblings came from some other realm and had some kind of adventure before ending-up in the void where they made the world. Kind of a gnostic cosmology thing.
Giving the siblings a history would make their confrontation more tragic and that cosmology opens-up the universe more. Like, you can bring in other deities. Perhaps the elves believe other races’ gods come from the same realm but they didn’t create the world and are thus false gods?

Also, perhaps like, the moon or stars could have been the sister’s failed attempts to emulate her brother’s creation which would make her “poison” a little more understandable.

That’s just off the top of my head.

 

[Saigonnus]

Instead of siblings, I see lovers.

Perhaps they come from a different universe, banished for their crimes against their people. When they arrived, they didn't find a void, but rather found a planet devoid of life. More importantly, they found magic; not something their universe offered. They spent decades exploring this lifeless chunk of rock, and grew to master magic, but they always felt lonely, and homesick, so they decided to use the barren (and geologically active) planet to rebuild what was stolen from them. To recreate their home planet, but better. A home planet 2.0.

Maybe the source of their schism is less from jealousy, and more of betrayal. After the creation of the first elves, maybe the man fell in love with one of his own creations and thus the seed of elvish magic was born. The first of these new and wondrous creatures capable of taming the magical forces of thier world.

 

[WooHooMan]

Instead of siblings, I see lovers.

Perhaps they come from a different universe, banished for their crimes against their people. When they arrived, they didn't find a void, but rather found a planet devoid of life. More importantly, they found magic; not something their universe offered. They spent decades exploring this lifeless chunk of rock, and grew to master magic, but they always felt lonely, and homesick, so they decided to use the barren (and geologically active) planet to rebuild what was stolen from them. To recreate their home planet, but better. A home planet 2.0.

Maybe the source of their schism is less from jealousy, and more of betrayal. After the creation of the first elves, maybe the man fell in love with one of his own creations and thus the seed of elvish magic was born. The first of these new and wondrous creatures capable of taming the magical forces of thier world.

Good idea but this kind of gets into a sort of tricky aspect of myth-making.
There's a trend for mythological couples to represent the default for couples within that culture. I'd be worried that portraying the primordial husband as a total good guy that gets screwed-over by the primordial wife's jealousy might set a bad standard for the elves' culture. With real world primordial couples, they tend to be both good people who make a mistake and deal with the consequences of that mistake (Adam and Eve, Rama and Sita, etc.) or both bad in their own ways (Zeus and Hera, etc.).

I do really like your idea of the god "falling in love" with his creation and magic being a manifestation of that love, like a gift. I'd strongly recommend focusing on that as a means of explaining and romanticizing magic in elf culture and it would make the goddess's jealousy a little more understandable.