Life Update

[BunnyJen90]

As some of you probably know about a month and a half ago I broke up with my now ex bf. I was able to quickly get a new bf but suddenly feeling I rushed into a new relationship and today texted him that I'm happier single. Now I'm planning on getting into writing and drawing more and finally make some short comic strips before I make my first comic book even though I'm usually busy working at resturant. Hopefully I can manage to motivate myself to work on my comics in the evenings when I'm not so busy with work.

 

[pmmg]

Well...with no pesky BF, nothing to stop you, but you

Picture the dream, and don't stop till you get there.

 

[BunnyJen90]

True been thinking of what I want to do now that I'm single and probably will be single for the rest of my life but not entirely sure I was just talking to my dad about how I want to be a comic book artist and he says I won't make a lot of money doing that which I guess he has a point about but maybe this is my generation compared to his generation but I would rather do something I enjoy than some odd job I don't enjoy just to make the money to survive. I've been working at restaurant for almost 4 years now and though it's a good start I eventually want to do something more enjoyable but I worry I'm going to end up stuck at restaurant.

 

[pmmg]

Life is full of things that we don't expect. No way to know what is coming. Just keep swimming.

 

[Mad Swede]

There's nothing much wrong with working in a job to pay the bills and then spending your free time doing something else.

The great British painter L S Lowry worked as a rent collector and painted in his spare time. He ended up a Fellow of the Royal Academy, and his paintings now sell for millions. The Swedish author Astrid Lindgren, creator of Pippi Longstocking, was a secretary almost her whole working life. Nobel Prize winner Selma Lagerlöf, creator of Nils Holgersson, was a teacher.

I shouldn't let your day job worry you or stop you being creative.

 

[BunnyJen90]

pmmg
I tend to be the type that likes to have some idea of what's going to happen. I think it's just the way my brain is. Even though I've been learning about mindfulness meditation since high school my mind is terrible at staying in the present moment. I tend to get bored easily with the present moment it seems.

Mad Swede
I have thought about making comics as just a hobby while keeping my job at restaurant. My only concern with that is that here in my country for some reason restaurant workers are looked down on, which I don't fully understand. I guess most people think it's really hard work for little pay but the truth is I wouldn't say the work is too hard as I'm usually able to keep up with orders when working in the kitchen but I'm also usually very energetic by nature and for a single person living on their own the money I'm making isn't really that bad. I mean its enough to live on my own. Inflation doesn't make it the easiest though but still. Maybe if I was married and has kids I'd want a better paying job but I don't think that will ever happen for me now. Still not sure what to do about all those stuck up people who say working at restaurant is stupid.

 

[Finchbearer]

I’m married and have a child, do a regular job and pursue my creative / intellectual hobbies in my spare time - all about balance! We can’t all be rich and famous unfortunately

 

[BunnyJen90]

True I wouldn't want to be rich anyway. Seems those that are rich are very stuck up and mean anyway

 

[Finchbearer]

…I wouldn’t begrudge a bit more money

 

[pmmg]

Does not help to go around hating on people, even those with money.

 

[BunnyJen90]

Well I don't know anyone rich personally but from what I hear about the rich and famous is that they are very self centered and stupid. And while some extra money is nice I'm happy as long as I got enough to manage living on my own.

 

[pmmg]

Hey Bunny,

I don't really know you, and don't walk in your shoes. Maybe you are in a dark place. There is just too much life ahead to be thinking one will be alone for ever, or forever working in a restaurant, or looked down on or whatever. If you have enough to make you happy, then you get to decide that. And if you want to be a comic book artist, then go and live the dream.

I can attest that I know many people of wealth, and many people without it. Who's nice, and who's stupid has nothing to do with that. From far away looking through this window, you have already projected stuff that I fear are just attitudes I would not want to carry life. There are good people and good things everywhere, and some will be good to you. Even if you make comics, or work in a restaurant, or anything else you may do.

I hope you find a place where there is more of that for you.

 

[BunnyJen90]

Sorry if I always seem depressed. It doesn't help when people say things like I'm autistic or ADHD. Also doesn't help that I've been lonely lately and its bringing back bad memories of being labeled as autistic and being forced to socialize as a teenager when the truth was I wanted nothing to do with others because they are mean. Also as weird as this sounds I like sadness as it feels soothing to me and reminds me of the attention I got from my parents as a kid when sad. I'm trying to enjoy being single but part of me is worried that it will just give others more reason to think I'm autistic.

 

[Finchbearer]

There is nothing wrong with being autistic / neurodivergent. Some of the most creative people out there are divergent thinkers - it’s what allows them to think outside the box.

If you are feeling mentally unwell it would be my suggestion to approach a healthcare professional. There’s nothing wrong with venting or conversing with people on the internet, but it has its limits. Stay well.

 

[BunnyJen90]

I don't get where you get the idea that it's okay to be autistic when most other people don't think that and I should know. And I don't know why I'm feeling so lonely after breaking up with my new boyfriend. I'm usually perfectly fine alone. Just doesn't help that people think I'm autistic because I don't like to socialize.

 

[pmmg]

I don't get where you get the idea that it's okay to be autistic when most other people don't think that and I should know.

There is no accounting for how other people behave, and maybe that is your experience, but it has not been mine.

For me personally, it is silly to hold against people stuff they cant help, but it is also silly to be aware of obstacles and let them stop you.


Parable about two wolves.

Inside us all there are two wolves. One wolf is evil, and full of our worst traits, Anger, and envy, and self-pity, and resentment... The other is good, and full of our better selves. Joy and love, and peace and hope. The fight with each other in a terrible battle, fighting for which will prevail, and which will get to define each of us.

Which wolf gets to win? The one you feed.

You are feeding the wrong wolf. Feed the other instead.

 

[BunnyJen90]

Well my personal experience from being labeled as ADHD and autistic has taught me otherwise about the way others treat those with disabilities you probably don't understand because you were never labeled as mentally disabled yourself.

 

[Mad Swede]

Well my personal experience from being labeled as ADHD and autistic has taught me otherwise about the way others treat those with disabilities you probably don't understand because you were never labeled as mentally disabled yourself.

Writing this as the father of a (now adult) autistic child, and as someone who is very severely dyslexic, what others think of your disabilities says more about their own predjudices than it ever does about you.

One of the things I had to learn was that l can write well despite my dyslexia. I didn't have that self-confidence when I left school, because I'd always been treated as stupid for not being able to read and write "properly". Landing in the right (Army) career made a difference, but mostly it was the encouragement and support I got from my superiors and the many friends I made in the Army. I've tried to give all my children that same support and encouragement, because it's believing in yourself which gives you the courage to go forwards in life.

And that's all I can encourage you to do. Believe in yourself as a writer and artist, that's what will get you going and help you overcome all the obstacles on the way to creating a successful comic. That doesn't mean give up on the day job, because somewhere along the line you have to pay for the food and occasional nice drink that keeps you going.

 

[pmmg]

Well my personal experience from being labeled as ADHD and autistic has taught me otherwise about the way others treat those with disabilities you probably don't understand because you were never labeled as mentally disabled yourself.

Well, I don't see how you could know what I was labelled or what I was not. And whatever I was labelled is beside the point.

So you've been labelled stuff and been treated someway...so what? You gonna let that keep you down? We all have something, and we all get beaten down. And I hope we all overcome. This talk above is too much wallowing, and not enough what is great about you. You can be anything you want. Nothing will stop you but you.

 

[BunnyJen90]

Maybe I am being stubborn and bitter but so tired of others thinking I'm mental.