tiefighter35
New Member
so I'm new here and recently I created a magic system for fun, and I would really apreciate if some people would be willing to give me feedback and some ideas to keep moving foward.
here is the system:
Everyone is born with an innate ability.
To access one’s ability you must sacrifice something (A body Part, part of your will/soul…) to the unknown Entity.
The greater the sacrifice the stronger one’s power.
Each power can be classified as: Enhancements, Psychic, Elemental and Cursed.
The Entity is an unknown Creature who appeared to humans 10 000 years ago and granted the only Free power. The Readers are a Family that is born with their power already unlocked, they can determine anyone’s ability.
Enhancement abilities enhance one’s capabilities, be it their strength, intelligence or speed…
Psychic abilities touch on the mind granting powers such as telekinesis, Mind reading… The Readers are part of this category.
Elemental abilities manipulate parts of the world like darkness, light, fire, water…
Cursed abilities are the most powerful but terrify the non-Cursed and are frowned upon. These include powers such as power over Life and Death, void manipulation, energy manipulation, summoning...
One’s power is determined by their parent’s ability but modified to fit one’s potential and character. However, it is not a mix, it is the ability of the parent with the strongest ability.
One can only Sacrifice to the Entity on their 17th birthday exactly 1 year after their reading, a ritual where a Reader determines their power. This is when they determine what they want to sacrifice if they want to activate their power.
A person who has sacrificed part of themselves can lose part of themselves in the ritual so only the strong willed and the brave dare to go through with it.
Extremely rare people are born who can learn other abilities from the same school as their original ability. They are called Avatars. However no-one can learn multiple schools, many have died trying or lost themselves in trying to sacrifice again. Some abilities allow the user to copy someone else’s ability but only for a short while.
There are 5 families that rule this world and maintain the order: the Readers, the four other Families represent the strongest of each school of ability. Enhancers are represented by the Cargesta, known for their ability of super Speed. Psychics are represented by the Terla, known for extremely powerful telekinesis. The elementals are represented by the Jilap, known for their potent manipulation of darkness. The Cursed are represented by the Harp - Tring, they are known for void manipulation while not inherently evil they are feared for their ability.
The Church of the Entity is the main religion of this country which has replaced the old gods which are revered by the Sect of the Old Ones. they gain their power through the complete sacrifice of their soul to the old gods after refusing the sacrifice at 17.
If during the sacrifice at 17 one chooses to sacrifice part of their will, they become a Monk of the Entity and give their life to the church as protectors of the land.
Each major Family controls one of the regions as the leaders. If a new powerful family emerges and can best the original one, power is transmitted to the new Family. This is however very rare.
Someone who uses the magic od sacrifice is known as a DemiMen for the simple reason that they lose part of themselves.
I thank you for having read my stuff and i hope you enjoyed it and have some tips
here is the system:
Everyone is born with an innate ability.
To access one’s ability you must sacrifice something (A body Part, part of your will/soul…) to the unknown Entity.
The greater the sacrifice the stronger one’s power.
Each power can be classified as: Enhancements, Psychic, Elemental and Cursed.
The Entity is an unknown Creature who appeared to humans 10 000 years ago and granted the only Free power. The Readers are a Family that is born with their power already unlocked, they can determine anyone’s ability.
Enhancement abilities enhance one’s capabilities, be it their strength, intelligence or speed…
Psychic abilities touch on the mind granting powers such as telekinesis, Mind reading… The Readers are part of this category.
Elemental abilities manipulate parts of the world like darkness, light, fire, water…
Cursed abilities are the most powerful but terrify the non-Cursed and are frowned upon. These include powers such as power over Life and Death, void manipulation, energy manipulation, summoning...
One’s power is determined by their parent’s ability but modified to fit one’s potential and character. However, it is not a mix, it is the ability of the parent with the strongest ability.
One can only Sacrifice to the Entity on their 17th birthday exactly 1 year after their reading, a ritual where a Reader determines their power. This is when they determine what they want to sacrifice if they want to activate their power.
A person who has sacrificed part of themselves can lose part of themselves in the ritual so only the strong willed and the brave dare to go through with it.
Extremely rare people are born who can learn other abilities from the same school as their original ability. They are called Avatars. However no-one can learn multiple schools, many have died trying or lost themselves in trying to sacrifice again. Some abilities allow the user to copy someone else’s ability but only for a short while.
There are 5 families that rule this world and maintain the order: the Readers, the four other Families represent the strongest of each school of ability. Enhancers are represented by the Cargesta, known for their ability of super Speed. Psychics are represented by the Terla, known for extremely powerful telekinesis. The elementals are represented by the Jilap, known for their potent manipulation of darkness. The Cursed are represented by the Harp - Tring, they are known for void manipulation while not inherently evil they are feared for their ability.
The Church of the Entity is the main religion of this country which has replaced the old gods which are revered by the Sect of the Old Ones. they gain their power through the complete sacrifice of their soul to the old gods after refusing the sacrifice at 17.
If during the sacrifice at 17 one chooses to sacrifice part of their will, they become a Monk of the Entity and give their life to the church as protectors of the land.
Each major Family controls one of the regions as the leaders. If a new powerful family emerges and can best the original one, power is transmitted to the new Family. This is however very rare.
Someone who uses the magic od sacrifice is known as a DemiMen for the simple reason that they lose part of themselves.
I thank you for having read my stuff and i hope you enjoyed it and have some tips
