Oops! Life's getting in the way!

[Netardapope]

Toodles, everyone, allow me to cut to the chase. As of late, I've found myself shirking off my daily writing duties to do a large number of real world activities that are consuming huge blocks of my time. I've been growing immensely irritated as of late, as there always seem to be some stupid activity that wants to get in the way of me having a free day to write.

I'm in at least a few leadership positions, one in my school and the other in the boy scouts, and this really drains me. I miss the days were I just went home and only had to worry about writing, but these other responsibilities are constantly on my mind. Not a second passes in which I don't think about them. But this has taken a toll on my writing.

I can't immerse myself in the world, because all this stuff keeps getting in the way. It's been a long time since the last day I'd been able to solely focus on my writing.

I don't mean to ramble, but I'm really torn on how I should approach this. I know for a fact that stress is an unavoidable part of life, but I'm not sure if I should ignore it while I'm writing, or finish the issues before I even start typing.

I just wish I could be able to focus on a few things, rather than being torn over all of these. What should I do? And have any of you felt the same?

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[DragonOfTheAerie]

Toodles, everyone, allow me to cut to the chase. As of late, I've found myself shirking off my daily writing duties to do a large number of real world activities that are consuming huge blocks of my time. I've been growing immensely irritated as of late, as there always seem to be some stupid activity that wants to get in the way of me having a free day to write.

I'm in at least a few leadership positions, one in my school and the other in the boy scouts, and this really drains me. I miss the days were I just went home and only had to worry about writing, but these other responsibilities are constantly on my mind. Not a second passes in which I don't think about them. But this has taken a toll on my writing.

I can't immerse myself in the world, because all this stuff keeps getting in the way. It's been a long time since the last day I'd been able to solely focus on my writing.

I don't mean to ramble, but I'm really torn on how I should approach this. I know for a fact that stress is an unavoidable part of life, but I'm not sure if I should ignore it while I'm writing, or finish the issues before I even start typing.

I just wish I could be able to focus on a few things, rather than being torn over all of these. What should I do? And have any of you felt the same?

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I relate, to a limited degree probably, but I relate. I'm homeschooled, so my schedule is flexible, but it can get overwhelming trying to fit all your responsibilities in with writing. My mom is not happy with how high writing is and always has been on my list of priorities. But, if i don't prioritize it, often it just gets forgotten amid all my other responsibilities.

As for suggestions...I don't know. You can slip in bits of writing here and there, but being able to really focus on it is different. I'd suggest parcelling your time more carefully. If you use social media, you could cut out that. Delete a few apps that eat your time. But, you might actually need the mindless down-time they provide.

If you're seriously stressed and unable to keep up with all your responsibilities, the best thing to do might be to figure out which ones are most important and...somehow cut back. Stress is not healthy. For me, not writing is not healthy, because it causes stress--I need that communion between my soul and the page. If you're serious about writing you've got to protect your writing time.

There's this idea that writing has to be at the bottom of your priorities list because it's just a hobby, it's not a real job, it's not an investment in your future, it cuts into the time you spend on "important" things...but I question that. If you are a writer, you need to write. If that means some other things fall to the wayside, so be it.

This probably sounds ridiculous. I know there are some things you CAN'T cut out. But i'd like us as writers to get out of the idea that our writing isn't important. That literally everything else in our lives must come before writing. No...we do have the right to prioritize writing even though society looks down on writing as useless and unproductive. It's not. You are not wasting your time or your life by writing.

Also, if you look hard enough for time, you will find it. See what I said about social media.

But don't push yourself to undue stress. Maintain your mental health. Take care of yourself.

 

[Netardapope]

I relate, to a limited degree probably, but I relate. I'm homeschooled, so my schedule is flexible, but it can get overwhelming trying to fit all your responsibilities in with writing. My mom is not happy with how high writing is and always has been on my list of priorities. But, if i don't prioritize it, often it just gets forgotten amid all my other responsibilities.

As for suggestions...I don't know. You can slip in bits of writing here and there, but being able to really focus on it is different. I'd suggest parcelling your time more carefully. If you use social media, you could cut out that. Delete a few apps that eat your time. But, you might actually need the mindless down-time they provide.

If you're seriously stressed and unable to keep up with all your responsibilities, the best thing to do might be to figure out which ones are most important and...somehow cut back. Stress is not healthy. For me, not writing is not healthy, because it causes stress--I need that communion between my soul and the page. If you're serious about writing you've got to protect your writing time.

There's this idea that writing has to be at the bottom of your priorities list because it's just a hobby, it's not a real job, it's not an investment in your future, it cuts into the time you spend on "important" things...but I question that. If you are a writer, you need to write. If that means some other things fall to the wayside, so be it.

This probably sounds ridiculous. I know there are some things you CAN'T cut out. But i'd like us as writers to get out of the idea that our writing isn't important. That literally everything else in our lives must come before writing. No...we do have the right to prioritize writing even though society looks down on writing as useless and unproductive. It's not. You are not wasting your time or your life by writing.

Also, if you look hard enough for time, you will find it. See what I said about social media.

But don't push yourself to undue stress. Maintain your mental health. Take care of yourself.

Thanks, social media is definetly an issue. I have this bad habit of listening to a bunch of music tracks for at least an hour before I get started writing, and it really takes up WAY too much time. It's kind of a shame though, I'll have to cut back on a lot of other visual media that actually gets me to visualize my writing better.

And don't get me wrong, writing will always be a high priority. It's the only thing to keep me sane nowadays! Without it, I'll be even more stressed than before! I just hope that it won't be very long until I'm able to be done with all this leadership stuff, I kind of miss acting like the true introvert that I am [emoji11]

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[DragonOfTheAerie]

Thanks, social media is definetly an issue. I have this bad habit of listening to a bunch of music tracks for at least an hour before I get started writing, and it really takes up WAY too much time. It's kind of a shame though, I'll have to cut back on a lot of other visual media that actually gets me to visualize my writing better.

And don't get me wrong, writing will always be a high priority. It's the only thing to keep me sane nowadays! Without it, I'll be even more stressed than before! I just hope that it won't be very long until I'm able to be done with all this leadership stuff, I kind of miss acting like the true introvert that I am [emoji11]

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In that case, I'd suggest (temporarily) deactivating at least some of your social media accounts (if you have multiple ones). They leech away so much valuable time, and often they don't enrich your life or serve much purpose. I find spending too much time on social media makes me feel dull and depressed. Not good.

And yeah, you might have to tweak your writing habit a bit. If doing these things helps you, don't quit completely, but you'll have to adapt a little. Cut back on the music a bit (or listen WHILE you write...may not work, I find it a little distracting if it's not instrumental, but I listen to instrumental music while I write and it's great.)

Leadership wouldn't suit me, heehee. My introvert/extrovert status *is* a little murky (I SERIOUSLY NEED my friends, but I also SERIOUSLY NEED my alone time.) but I call myself the Extrovert who Hates People. I just like to hole up in my room and hide from humanity, lol.

 

[Demesnedenoir]

Kill the music, or listen while writing. TV, internet, phone, they're all the devil.

Distractions? Wife, two children, my own business, my wife's business, homeschooling, and everything all those entail plus some... and somehow I managed 150k words in about 6 months (including initial editing passes) and now working with an editor... which really put a nail in working on the second book, LOL. I've learned to write/edit while pestered by children, a tv on, music on, the girls' crazed parakeets bantering, in between the honey-do list, you name it. Frustrating? Oh yes, at times. If only in my single years I'd spent less time gaming and drinking, and well... more gaming and drinking, LOL.

The main thing I can't at least do some sort of writing through is exhaustion... anything under 5-6 hours of sleep, my window for writing in the day is going to be horrifically small, heh heh.

 

[Netardapope]

Kill the music, or listen while writing. TV, internet, phone, they're all the devil.

Distractions? Wife, two children, my own business, my wife's business, homeschooling, and everything all those entail plus some... and somehow I managed 150k words in about 6 months (including initial editing passes) and now working with an editor... which really put a nail in working on the second book, LOL. I've learned to write/edit while pestered by children, a tv on, music on, the girls' crazed parakeets bantering, in between the honey-do list, you name it. Frustrating? Oh yes, at times. If only in my single years I'd spent less time gaming and drinking, and well... more gaming and drinking, LOL.

The main thing I can't at least do some sort of writing through is exhaustion... anything under 5-6 hours of sleep, my window for writing in the day is going to be horrifically small, heh heh.

Oh lord, I dreaded this day coming. Music's gonna have to die entirely then, only after I've finished writing will I listen to it. I'd try listening during my writing session, which has worked in the past, but later on it only leads to more distraction. Goodbye to music it is.

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[DragonOfTheAerie]

Oh lord, I dreaded this day coming. Music's gonna have to die entirely then, only after I've finished writing will I listen to it. I'd try listening during my writing session, which has worked in the past, but later on it only leads to more distraction. Goodbye to music it is.

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If it helps inspire you, I wouldn't get rid of it entirely. But spending THAT MUCH time listening, honestly sounds like procrastination. Listening to an appropriate track or two to warm up prior to a writing session may do more good than harm, especially if you're accustomed to it. Just don't let it take up a significant amount of time.

 

[Netardapope]

If it helps inspire you, I wouldn't get rid of it entirely. But spending THAT MUCH time listening, honestly sounds like procrastination. Listening to an appropriate track or two to warm up prior to a writing session may do more good than harm, especially if you're accustomed to it. Just don't let it take up a significant amount of time.

I know, but I get hooked into it. I work in the exact opposite way as other people. When there's a bad habit, I don't use moderation to kill it, I just force myself down the other extreme. It yields betters results for me.

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[DragonOfTheAerie]

I know, but I get hooked into it. I work in the exact opposite way as other people. When there's a bad habit, I don't use moderation to kill it, I just force myself down the other extreme. It yields betters results for me.

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Whatever works best for you Hopefully you'll find this opens up lots of writing time.

 

[Demesnedenoir]

I used to be similar, I had to kill music in order to write, basically I'd have the white noise of a fan and anything else was murder, and once I was listening to music, yup, an hour would pass in a blink, now I'm hungry, and sheesh, need a pop, and damn, time to do whatever now. Music was a total distraction, but me likeed music. I've now settled on soundtrack worthy music, depending my mood this can range from the Kongos to Enigma to the Legendary Pink Dots to looping Placebo's remake of Running Up That Hill over and over when finishing the first draft of the ms, LOL.

Like anything, listening to music and writing can be trained, but the trick, like any training, is actually doing it, LOL. Hence my route to becoming a golf pro (after God told me to*) has been a slow one. I'm now thinking maybe the senior, senior tour...

* A Johnny Fever, WKRP in Cincinnati, reference for you whippersnappers who don't watch a lot of old tv.

I know, but I get hooked into it. I work in the exact opposite way as other people. When there's a bad habit, I don't use moderation to kill it, I just force myself down the other extreme. It yields betters results for me.

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[Penpilot]

For me, life is going to always try and get in the way of writing, but one of the things I do to make the writing happen is to not wait until I have a large chunk of time. If I have to, I write fifteen minutes here, a half hour there, another fifteen, etc.

Also, I put TV and video games on the back burner. None of that until I've done my writing.

It's all about prioritising. Writing is almost always on the top of the list of the things to do. Now this isn't to say I don't take days off here and there, but on average writing is at the top. Now if writing isn't at or near the top, well that's just way it is for you. It's nothing to get worked up about.

The most important things people make time for. The stuff that isn't as important gets pushed to the back constantly. Like I said you just have to figure out what goes where in importance and live with it.

 

[Nimue]

Placebo's remake of Running Up That Hill

Had to pop in because I've never heard anyone else mention this song, but I really quite like it. Works very well as a mood-setter.

As far as music goes, I have brainstorming music--high emotion content, lyrics, modern music, anything that works--and then I have atmospheric music, which is a mix of about a million movie, game, and TV soundtracks, and mostly the quiet thematic bits. I make variations of playlists tailored to specific stories. Brainstorming music is for the commute, falling asleep to, drawing, anytime I have the brain space. Atmospheric music is background for when I'm trying to get words on the page.

As for the rest... I'm so wildly unqualified to give advice about writing habits that I'm just going to back away with my hands up and flee.

 

[Demesnedenoir]

Another quick note on music... in particular with atmosphere/during writing music, I always play stuff I know well so that my brain isn't tempted to pay much attention... I know the rhythms, I know the lyrics, I know the order, I know I like every song, there's nothing for my brain to work on while listening. If I plugged in something new or different it wouldn't work the same for me.

 

[Svrtnsse]

I always play stuff I know well so that my brain isn't tempted to pay much attention... I know the rhythms, I know the lyrics, I know the order, I know I like every song, there's nothing for my brain to work on while listening. If I plugged in something new or different it wouldn't work the same for me.

I just want to second this.
I see a lot of people saying they can't listen to music with lyrics, and that's probably the case for them, but I think one thing to consider is how well you know the music. When you're familiar enough with it, the words become just another part of the "aural image" if that's an expression.

 

[CupofJoe]

I just want to second this.
I see a lot of people saying they can't listen to music with lyrics, and that's probably the case for them, but I think one thing to consider is how well you know the music. When you're familiar enough with it, the words become just another part of the "aural image" if that's an expression.

I can see [ahem...] a Catch 22 with this...
If I like the music well enough to want to hear it again and again, then I'm probably emotionally liked to it enough to want to listen to it. Thereby drawing me out the state I want to be in. I like long form pieces; symphonies, operas and the like. I find they work the best for me [but the operas can't be in english - if they are I end up trying to workout the words].

 

[Svrtnsse]

These days when I start a bigger story project I try to pick out a playlist of songs that fit the mood of the story and the personality of the character, and then I try to stick with that whenever I'm working on the story.

These playlists tend to be pretty varied, and they often overlap in many places. After all, it's I who put them together. It works for me though, and even though they are songs I'm linked to in some way they also come to be associated with the story. Well, some of them, not all.
If I get it right though, the playlist does carry the mood I want for the story and for my main character.

Additionally, as a bit of an exercise, I try to pick out a few songs to represent my main character and write a short explanation of why. This usually makes for an excellent topic for a blog post as well (Soundtrack For A Holy Warrior ? s v r t n s s e). That's just five songs, but the original playlist is close to two hundred - nearly 17 hours of music. It's a lot, but when writing on the story for several months, it's not that much.

 

[Chessie]

Kill the music, or listen while writing. TV, internet, phone, they're all the devil.

Distractions? Wife, two children, my own business, my wife's business, homeschooling, and everything all those entail plus some... and somehow I managed 150k words in about 6 months (including initial editing passes) and now working with an editor... which really put a nail in working on the second book, LOL. I've learned to write/edit while pestered by children, a tv on, music on, the girls' crazed parakeets bantering, in between the honey-do list, you name it. Frustrating? Oh yes, at times. If only in my single years I'd spent less time gaming and drinking, and well... more gaming and drinking, LOL.

The main thing I can't at least do some sort of writing through is exhaustion... anything under 5-6 hours of sleep, my window for writing in the day is going to be horrifically small, heh heh.

YIKES. And here I am complaining about a husband + 1.5 kids + 2 cats whining that I have no Fallout 4/Skyrim time because it gets in the way of my writing.

 

[DragonOfTheAerie]

YIKES. And here I am complaining about a husband + 1.5 kids + 2 cats whining that I have no Fallout 4/Skyrim time because it gets in the way of my writing.

How does one have 1.5 kids?

 

[Saigonnus]

How does one have 1.5 kids?

Perhaps they have a hobbit... [emoji23]


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[Russ]

How does one have 1.5 kids?

It's a quantum physics/Shroedinger's cat kind of thing...