Hi there! - Aspiring Fantasy Author Here Seeking Beta Readers and Other Authors

[WanderingBard]

Hello!
I am a writer who has currently finished the first three books in my own fantasy series, and am taking the exciting journey of self publishing. I am currently trying to find other potential beta readers who might be interested in giving my first book a read, and giving me any and all feedback they might have. I would also be more than willing to participate in a beta-swap with other authors. I have beta read a lot of different works for other writers before, and I find it fun to do.

For a brief introduction on the series I am working on, Summoner's Worldsong is an epic-styled fantasy story centered on exploration, magic, companionship, and discovering unfamiliar places and peoples, and overcoming adversity through hard work and trust. It follows Friede, a young man who becomes what is known as a summoner. What begins as a poorly planned rescue gradually expands into a journey through human and elven lands, dangerous ruins, magical conflict, unfamiliar cultures, and a growing group of companions finding their place alongside one another.

Ballad of Water is currently around 169,000 words and is written primarily in second person from Friede’s perspective. It’s the first book of a larger journey, though I’ve tried to give it its own complete arc rather than simply treating it as setup for later books.

Looking forward to meeting everyone and seeing what people here are working on.

 

[pmmg]

Howdy Bard. Welcome here.

170k in second person?

 

[WanderingBard]

Howdy Bard. Welcome here.

170k in second person?

Yup! That's the first book. The second and third books have a few chapters and scenes where Friede is not currently present, so those are in third person.

 

[ennyedits]

Hello!
I am a writer who has currently finished the first three books in my own fantasy series, and am taking the exciting journey of self publishing. I am currently trying to find other potential beta readers who might be interested in giving my first book a read, and giving me any and all feedback they might have. I would also be more than willing to participate in a beta-swap with other authors. I have beta read a lot of different works for other writers before, and I find it fun to do.

For a brief introduction on the series I am working on, Summoner's Worldsong is an epic-styled fantasy story centered on exploration, magic, companionship, and discovering unfamiliar places and peoples, and overcoming adversity through hard work and trust. It follows Friede, a young man who becomes what is known as a summoner. What begins as a poorly planned rescue gradually expands into a journey through human and elven lands, dangerous ruins, magical conflict, unfamiliar cultures, and a growing group of companions finding their place alongside one another.

Ballad of Water is currently around 169,000 words and is written primarily in second person from Friede’s perspective. It’s the first book of a larger journey, though I’ve tried to give it its own complete arc rather than simply treating it as setup for later books.

Looking forward to meeting everyone and seeing what people here are working on.

That's great. What kind of feedback are you looking for and also have you edit your story?

 

[WanderingBard]

That's great. What kind of feedback are you looking for and also have you edit your story?

Thank you. All three books have gone through editing done by me. As for feedback I am currently looking to see how the overall reader experience is. Things like engagement and pacing, character clarity and bonds, readability for the perspective, and overall satisfaction. Since the series is so far along already, I'm really interested to hear if after the first book if readers want to continue.

 

[Prince of Spires]

Congrats on getting the stories finished! Unfortunately I don't have any time at the moment to beta-read.

I'm intrigued though by second person POV. I don't think I've ever read any. Would you want to post a small snippet here to give an idea what it reads like?

 

[WanderingBard]

Congrats on getting the stories finished! Unfortunately I don't have any time at the moment to beta-read.

I'm intrigued though by second person POV. I don't think I've ever read any. Would you want to post a small snippet here to give an idea what it reads like?

Sure! Here is a small sample.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Two dark figures that look to reach only half your height, move slowly up the hallway. Their limbs don’t appear to have hands or feet, and heads resemble that of a jagged triangle. Your uncertainty in what you see causes you to trip forward into the hallway. The shapes jerk themselves around at the sound of your boots thumping against the stone floor.

“Intruder!” One of them screeches in a raspy voice that sends chills through your entire body. How can it talk without a mouth!?

Panic begins to set in as the pitch black bodies begin to vibrate and shift their shapes. The ends of their arms mold to become even more narrow and pointed like a freshly smithed dagger. Their legs, whose ends seem to create a small pool of shadow with every step they take towards you, sprout a set of clawed toes that have the sharpness to pierce into the stone floor itself. What probably unsettles you the most though; is when the lights along the walls pass their faces, there is nothing to be seen whatsoever. No eyes, no mouth, not even a nose. It was as if these creatures were made from pure shadow itself.

You unsheathe the sword from your back and grip its handle tightly with both hands. The length of the blade is a tad unwieldy for you, but it will have to do. You point the greatsword forward with unsteady hands.

“I-I’m warning you!” You stammer as your hands start to quiver. “I’ve been t-t-trained on how to use a s-s-sword! D-Don’t come any closer!”

This does not seem to halt the pair’s quickening advance…you guess it was wishful thinking to think things without a face could be threatened like that. You suck in a harsh breath through your teeth and your muscles begin to twitch.

Should I run away? With how short they are, I could probably sprint down the stairs and leave the castle before they can catch me…but then what would happen to Uncle Gunther? What if things like this took him? No! I can’t run away. If my uncle is here, I’m going to find him and set him free. He and dad taught me everything I know about using a sword. They are some of the best there is, I can take two squatty shadows…hopefully.

“This is it.” You make up your mind, gathering your courage and taking a deep breath. You bring your sword to a guarding stance in front of you. “Okay, Friede. The first real fight for your life and you don’t even know what you’re up against. Guess things can never be easy.”

Before you can hope to formulate some sort of battle plan, one of the shadow creatures lunges forward toward you, its one arm poised to pierce your throat. You jerk the top side of your body so that instead of your neck, the creature’s weaponized limb meets with the flat of your sword. The sound of clanging metal echoes through the hallway.

Your mind races to make sense of how an arm of shadow can be this sharp and solid as it scrapes against the steel of your blade, but instinct to survive soon takes over. Pushing your arms forward, you deflect the first creature away as it skids back a few feet after landing onto the floor.

Too soon you forget that you are actually fighting two enemies, as the second being of shadow takes advantage of your split focus to deliver a swift slash that just grazes your arm; drawing blood. Taking a panicked jump backward, you try to distance yourself from your opponents. You grip the part of your arm that stings with pain, while shakily keeping the sword pointed in front of you with the other hand. Blood is smeared across your palm when you bring it back before firmly gripping your sword’s handle with it. The two shadows hiss and raise their arms to ready themselves to come at you once more.

Without a shield or something easier to swing around, I can’t stay on the defensive. I need to remember everything I was taught. I barely have any time to think though! I wish I could keep these stupid things away from me for just a few seconds!

Uttering a silent prayer, you take a large step forward in tandem with the swing of your arms across your body. The arcing blade glides through the air in front of you, almost the entire width of the hallway. Both shadows stop their advance as to not catch the tip of your blade; marking your turn to go on the offensive.

Now with some momentum, you continue to make wide slashes at both creatures in front of you. They continue to jump backward and duck under your blade, before they decide to take away your short lived control of the situation. One of the shadows catches your sword between its two pointed arms, which begin to change their shape right before your very eyes. Its tips start to flatten against your steel and the shadows begin to slowly creep forward. This thing is actually trying to take your sword from you!

You try to yank your sword from its encroaching grip, before the second creature can take its chance to make another swipe at you. In a desperate attempt to dodge the oncoming sharpened point, you throw yourself back into the wall behind you. The mistake of moving backwards instead of to the side earned you a sharp graze across your chest, and even though the pain is red hot, you suppose it’s better than being skewered.

The other shadow still holds your blade in between its slowly spreading hands, but buckles from your sudden movement. Your temper heated by the pain of your wounds, you grip your sword tighter, and with a hard pull, you lodge the blade from the shadow creature’s grip slightly. Instinct angles your weapon towards its chest and demands that you push with all your might. Steel runs the body of shadow through making it screech in pain as it quickly dissipates into nothing.

The second shadow does not grant you the time to properly process what just happened. It lunges forward at you with alarming speed with pointed arms set to pierce. Your arms move before your mind, swinging your sword sideways to clash against the daggers of shadow. The weight of your weapon breaks through your opponent’s guard, and causes it to stagger backwards, and the opening you need seems to flash before your eyes. A strong step forward, followed by a slash of your blade, tears through the shadow’s midsection, cutting it in half inch by inch. Just like the first, it screeches in pain as it disappears when your steel touches the stone floor.

 

[Walepages]

Hello!
I am a writer who has currently finished the first three books in my own fantasy series, and am taking the exciting journey of self publishing. I am currently trying to find other potential beta readers who might be interested in giving my first book a read, and giving me any and all feedback they might have. I would also be more than willing to participate in a beta-swap with other authors. I have beta read a lot of different works for other writers before, and I find it fun to do.

For a brief introduction on the series I am working on, Summoner's Worldsong is an epic-styled fantasy story centered on exploration, magic, companionship, and discovering unfamiliar places and peoples, and overcoming adversity through hard work and trust. It follows Friede, a young man who becomes what is known as a summoner. What begins as a poorly planned rescue gradually expands into a journey through human and elven lands, dangerous ruins, magical conflict, unfamiliar cultures, and a growing group of companions finding their place alongside one another.

Ballad of Water is currently around 169,000 words and is written primarily in second person from Friede’s perspective. It’s the first book of a larger journey, though I’ve tried to give it its own complete arc rather than simply treating it as setup for later books.

Looking forward to meeting everyone and seeing what people here are working on.

Hey!

I was reading through your post, and Ballad of Water caught my attention, especially the decision to write it in second person. That's a pretty unusual choice for an epic fantasy, and I'm curious how it works with Friede's journey and the world you've built around him.
I also noticed you've already finished three books in the series, which is quite a commitment!
I'd be interested in giving the first book a read and sharing my thoughts as I go. I'd particularly like to see how the story flows, whether the characters feel believable, and if there are moments where things get confusing or the pacing slows down.

Are you still looking for beta readers? I'd be happy to start with a few chapters and see how things go.

 

[Prince of Spires]

Thanks for sharing! It's a nice swordfight. And the second person POV works. Though I'm not sure a whole novel of it is for me.

 

[xena]

Three books is amazing!! Congratulations!!

 

[WanderingBard]

Thanks for sharing! It's a nice swordfight. And the second person POV works. Though I'm not sure a whole novel of it is for me.

Thanks! I appreciate the compliments. I was of a similar opinion when I first started reading second person, but it quickly became a favorite of mine. For lack of a better term, it is a very comfortable middle ground between first and third. You are also to focus on the internal workings of your main perspective, while being able to use some tools and prose that are available to third person stories.