So in my WIP, I tell the story from the perspective from a naive young woman (not entirely, there are small bits from someone else's head, but it's mostly her). My question is this: When I'm narrating, I tend to write it how she would think it, but then there's some bits where I'm just a narrator in my own voice. Is that too confusing? I mean, do I have to choose just one voice? Here's an excerpt to maybe illustrate what it's like:
Garrett turned away from the window and stared coldly at her, sitting on her bed. His face was stern, unkind. Not at all how her brother usually looked at her. “Are you living in a fairy tale? You are promised to Rafe. The papers are signed; money has changed hands. But you still believe Hollis is going to ride into that church and break up the ceremony by confessing his love. How can I be any more clear? He’s not coming!
“If you carry on with him, you are dishonoring more than yourself. As a married woman, having an affair like this disgraces your husband as well. How kindly will Rafe look upon you after you’ve dishonored him?”
Linnette didn’t want to hear it. In her mind, and in her heart, she wanted Hollis to step in. She would prepare for the wedding as she was supposed to do, and she would speak the words she was bade, but when it came to her heart, she could not change it. Hollis was the only man she loved, and Rafe, if he wanted to be married to Linnette, would have to accept that.
So in the first paragraph, I'm narrating in my own voice, then in the last one, I'm narrating in Linnette's voice, and obviously not in my own words. Is this too confusing? Or is it perfectly acceptable to switch back and forth? Sorry, I know it's a silly question, but n answer now might save me many hours of rewriting. THANKS!
Garrett turned away from the window and stared coldly at her, sitting on her bed. His face was stern, unkind. Not at all how her brother usually looked at her. “Are you living in a fairy tale? You are promised to Rafe. The papers are signed; money has changed hands. But you still believe Hollis is going to ride into that church and break up the ceremony by confessing his love. How can I be any more clear? He’s not coming!
“If you carry on with him, you are dishonoring more than yourself. As a married woman, having an affair like this disgraces your husband as well. How kindly will Rafe look upon you after you’ve dishonored him?”
Linnette didn’t want to hear it. In her mind, and in her heart, she wanted Hollis to step in. She would prepare for the wedding as she was supposed to do, and she would speak the words she was bade, but when it came to her heart, she could not change it. Hollis was the only man she loved, and Rafe, if he wanted to be married to Linnette, would have to accept that.
So in the first paragraph, I'm narrating in my own voice, then in the last one, I'm narrating in Linnette's voice, and obviously not in my own words. Is this too confusing? Or is it perfectly acceptable to switch back and forth? Sorry, I know it's a silly question, but n answer now might save me many hours of rewriting. THANKS!