Writing and Form Factors

[skip.knox]

I've started doing this lately and wondered if anyone else has tried the same: as I get a draft into readable shape, but not yet ready to show to others, I used to print it. You know, old habits and all that. Print the thing, get out pens (I hate highlighters) and mark it up, then return to the computer for revisions.

I still do that, but lately I've also been saving as .mobi or as .rtf and reading the piece on my Kindle or even on my phone. Anything to provide a different form factor. It has brought up some unexpected points, of which I'll mention just one hear, hoping to have others chime in.

Paragraph length.

We are often advised "don't write long paragraphs, modern readers can't take long paragraphs." Leaving aside whether or not this is actually true, what constitutes "long" here? Aahhh. Long means "covers the whole danged page" more or less, right? But on my phone, *all* paragraphs are long paragraphs. So what does that say about what a reader will or won't tolerate and, by turn, what we ought or ought not aim toward?

No real answers here, but reading my work in different formats has certainly provided some interesting perspectives.

 

[Feo Takahari]

Reminds me of when I tried to write a video game. Sometimes a single sentence of dialogue that took up little space on a page would completely fill the dialogue box in the game. To keep from filling too many boxes, I had to be much, much more concise than usual (a particular challenge when maintaining one character's very verbose style of speech--I had to get to the point while giving the impression he was taking forever to get to the point.)

 

[Penpilot]

I write in Scrivener and I check grammer with Word and a program called style writer. The change in the way the text is laid out helps ferret out mistakes, because there's a different look and flow to the way the words look on the page.

I hear there are some authors who when they edit changed the font size to their text so the paragraphs and sentences are shaped different. That way it makes it harder for your brain to auto read something and insert a certain flow to it that isn't there.

 

[wordwalker]

My way of defining long paragraphs was to: take a lot of books in the style I like, then for each author find what seems to be the longest paragraphs that seem to generally work for them, and count words. That told me that, for me, 90-120 words is about as long as I'm comfortable with. (Although, I'm a big believer in splitting paragraphs up to play up their changes, and the rules are different for a big block about the growing mood of the afternoon or the journey or such. As long as there's no important specific in there you can't risk the reader missing.)

 

[Caged Maiden]

I don't think there's anything else to say about formatting, the above responses pretty much cover it.

Another thing to think about, regarding paragraph length, is that every time you switch a character, the paragraph should change. every time you switch subjects, begin a new paragraph. I follow the rules of paragraphs and have NEVER thought, "Hmm.. this paragraph is too darn long..." Maybe what you're really having is a problem deciding where it should end. For me, I often wonder how I can combine paragraphs. Most of my book is going to be white space, I fear. Where in your WIP are you having these kinds of problems? Dialogues that turn into monologues? Descriptions of people and places? Inner thoughts? It would help to know where the issue occurs and maybe there's a technical problem you're experiencing like combining things into one paragraph that ought to be split into two. Here's a short segment from my WIP (not trying to insinuate I'm a great writer, I'm not, but I have a fair grasp of paragraph spacing). In this short segment, I show dialogue, inner thoughts, description. Hope it helps illustrates (even if you firmly grasp the concept, maybe someone else would find it helpful) where to break paragraphs:



“So this is it?” Vincenzo set a canvas bag on a narrow bed against a brick wall. He stretched his neck and shoulder, still troubling him after days of rest. Yvette couldn’t do anything about that. Doctors were expensive. (could have even started a new paragraph after "brick wall" if I wasn't trying to combine paragraphs as a habit, or after "days of rest".)

Yvette dropped a matching bag on the table. “It’s not much, but it’s what I can afford and you’ll be right down the street from the brothel.” (need to start a new paragraph here because the next action is taken by Vincenzo again.)

He glanced around the modest room, a lean-to built for the stable hands of the rundown inn. “Well at least that’s good news.” (next action is Yvette again... so new paragraph.)

She narrowed her eyes.

“I meant communicating will be easy,” he said. (a good thing about writing dialogue like this is that it's easy to see who's talking. I've read work where pragraphs are combines and frankly, it's confusing.)

His smirk left her unconvinced. (this deserves its own paragraph. I know it's Vincenzo's smirk we're reading about, but the perspective is Yvettes. She's actually acting, because it's her OBSERVATION. Therefore, it needs a new paragraph. If I combined the two, I'd have Vincenzo speking and Yvette observing his smirk in the same paragraph.)

“With a rat in the gears, we’re fortunate to only have to walk a few blocks anytime we need to talk. Speaking of which, have you made any progress on that?”

Yvette opened tattered drapes, sending a cloud of dust into the air. She coughed and waved her hand about as Vincenzo opened the window to suck out the offensive particles. “Claudia is looking into it.” (My instinct was to begin a new paragraph with "She coughed" but I'm working on trying to combine little lines into bigger paragraphs wherever appropriate.)

He opened the cloth sack and took out a spare change of clothing. “Claudia? You trust her with that kind of work?”

Yvette hid a smile. “I’m surprised. You obviously trust her somewhat.”

He grinned, winking. “Claudia’s a nice girl. It’s not her loyalty I question. But she’s green. Isn’t flushing out a rat a job better suited for me or you?”

Vincenzo Gritti, once the second son of a powerful family, looked like nothing more than any other man down on his luck. Despite having survived through desperate circumstances, his eyes shone with light and life few others could muster. (I began a new paragraph here because there is a slight change in perspective, from her observing him to her contemplating her thoughts. Now, some writers would have combined them. Maybe I should have. But for me, whenever there is a slight shift in subject matter or perspective, I begin a new chapter.)

Yvette admired that sort of perseverance. Rope burns still healed on the side of his neck, a painful reminder of the last time green employees did a less than stellar job. “Cassandra’s on her boat. I had to send someone,” Yvette said softly, folding down the blankets upon the bed.




Okay, so I hope that might clarify (for anyone struggling with it) where to begin new paragraphs. The rules for paragraphs are simple. Every time a thought changes (like you're talking about one thing and switch to talking about another thing. That includes "Gray clouds waited to dump rain on the travelers... NEW PARAGRAPH Hoods up and cloaks pulled tight, the travelers leaned into the wind...")

Whenever someoone new acts or speaks, you should begin a new paragraph. One thing I like to do occasionally is show a reaction next to the action, like: When Leland struck Finley, she reeled from the blow and fell to her knees. "Oww," she said holding her hand to her nose. NEW PARAGRAPH. "You got what you deserved," Leland said, glaring... I combined Leland's action (striking) with Finley's reaction (reeling). That's okay to do, but it would be inappropriate if I combined Leland's dialogue into that paragraph. It needs a new one.

Hope some of this helps someone. Best wishes.