ASK ME MORE!

[Quarney]

Hi there. Im working on my project Demon's Ledger, aiming to build my own universe which connects the occult&demonology with linear algebra stuff.
Although I gave basic intros about where, what, how about demon's behaviour--I think there are a lot to develop still. It's feel like that the model hasnt been properly developed yet.
So if u r interested, plz help me check the logic and development together.
Here's the link:

Demon's Ledger by WeiredNerd

weirednerd.itch.io

 

[Romy]

Been poking around in your ledger a bit... The red script on a black background is very difficult to read.
Still early, like the format but navigating is a bit getting used to.

 

[Quarney]

Been poking around in your ledger a bit... The red script on a black background is very difficult to read.
Still early, like the format but navigating is a bit getting used to.

Thank you! This is an ongoing project including maths and occult, which I am still learning. The workflow includes: learning/reading knowledge--finding out the connection of my universe--organizing and coding. I view this one as a long-term worldbuilding...Anyway, thank u for reading!
(the red line: Your father is a so-called mad prophet in his hometown. But does it matter to me?"--I deliberately used this kind of font for atmosphere..hmmm, I might find a more readable one later, thanks for feedback.)

 

[Romy]

Nobody can say your demons will be one dimensional I am wondering how the relation x,y,z will work out... (time usually is 4, how cinema4d got it's name)

The text might feel a bit 'runes' like this which should be hard to read but might be too much. Also hires screen might make this harder.
Already like the 'not too much text' on a web page which I am struggling with myself, so keeping an eye open.

 

[Quarney]

The categorizing is not a copy-down of the physical model--it is more like an algorithm aiming to describe the features of demons--just think about how Netflix figures out your preference by analysing your clicks, contents, staying time. The xyz is similar to that, used to make us understand the demons easier.
uhmm...And the reading feels difficult right? Is it because of the dimness or the size of fonts?

 

[Romy]

Try the 'about demons' section, the top disapears and you get what you get in 'author's note' (which isn't really an author's note but a lettter towards a daughter? and why would you have to introduce yourself to your daughter - something's not consistent in there, might have started of as something else).

Navigation hops around too much. While in the 'about demons' section and selecting a subsection ('prelude', the other submenu items ('origin', 'behaviour','cat'..) disappear making it hard to continue reading the same section. You always have to go back to "about demons".
Keep the 'submenu' of the active chapter open? Might also be convenient to have a previous/next link on the story page so you don't have to get back to the menu all the time. Having those the same as the prev/next menu item can be a bonus.

I do need to enlarge to about 150% for easy reading but that might be a problem on my side, it does scale ok (very well even). Runes stay hard to read but intentional, probably ok if not too often. Try different colors or just the script font?

 

[Quarney]

Try the 'about demons' section, the top disapears and you get what you get in 'author's note' (which isn't really an author's note but a lettter towards a daughter? and why would you have to introduce yourself to your daughter - something's not consistent in there, might have started of as something else).

Navigation hops around too much. While in the 'about demons' section and selecting a subsection ('prelude', the other submenu items ('origin', 'behaviour','cat'..) disappear making it hard to continue reading the same section. You always have to go back to "about demons".
Keep the 'submenu' of the active chapter open? Might also be convenient to have a previous/next link on the story page so you don't have to get back to the menu all the time. Having those the same as the prev/next menu item can be a bonus.

I do need to enlarge to about 150% for easy reading but that might be a problem on my side, it does scale ok (very well even). Runes stay hard to read but intentional, probably ok if not too often. Try different colors or just the script font?

The letter is intentional--it has a reason.
and about the navigation: it is the mechanism of sugarcube. But let me see if there are other ways for navigation.
Twine has the previous link on the right top. But u r right. I plan to do a page index for it.
So is it because the font design or the size making it hard to read? I would like to know more about it.

 

[Romy]

The letter is ok but "author's note" does not match with "your daughter". In the text it starts of as speaking to the reader but goes on as a letter to the author's daughter. That switch does not come over very well (to me).

Difficult: probably the script font in combination with the color (red on black).