Casting the Bait: What lure should I use and how should I use it?

[Steerpike]

@Heliotrope:

How is he using the phrase "reader tension?"

I wonder whether that advice applies more to one type of books than another. When I read Lee Child or Michael Connelly, I expect tension on every page, and that's what the authors deliver. If I'm reading Lord of the Rings, or a Steven Erikson novel, for example, I don't expect it and I'm not sure I want it. Maybe Maas is talking about something different from what I'm thinking about.

I feel that a lot of writing books are geared toward writing best-selling reads of the type you'd take to the beach with you. Fast-paced thrillers, for example. And I like those kinds of books. But while the advice might work in other types of novels as well, I don't think it is required in them in the same way it is in those thrillers. If you're reading the types of books I envision Maas talking about, you're going to expect to see tension on every page and feel let down if it's not there. But for other types of books it may be neither expected nor wanted.

 

[Heliotrope]

Right, so that's why I said "If that is your goal". Otherwise, what are some other strategies?

 

[Steerpike]

Right, so that's why I said "If that is your goal". Otherwise, what are some other strategies?

Yep I'm wondering if that is something Maas thinks should be every writer's goal?

For me, I like every page to be interesting, of course. It doesn't have to be tension. It can be further plot or character development, or even just interesting writing. I think working with character development is one of the best ways to pull reader interest along, assuming you've created some kind of connection between the reader and the character. If the reader cares about the character and what is happening to her, then even what might appear to be relatively mundane scenes can be interesting if they're further fleshing out a character or addressing some form of conflict she has.

 

[FifthView]

Let's get into practical application.

So for me, it's not about deconstructing every imaginable span in a book. Page to page, chapter to chapter, sentence to sentence, and how to draw a reader through all these spans.

Those are valuable things to know, heh, but when I focus on trying to understand if there's a definable "story hook," then call it what you will, I'm only looking at what I need to do sometime before Act 2 and when I need to do it for any given story.

So back to distinguishing between "hook" and "promise."

As far as I'm concerned, the hook's only purpose is to present a kind of Rubicon, heh. There's no turning back.

For me as writer, this means that once I've established X, Y, Z, then X, Y, Z are established and everything I do after that point will be defined by these, come whatever twists and turns might come.

For the reader, this point might become a promise–it probably will–but the success of the promise (to be fulfilled) is irrelevant to the success of the hook, if that makes sense. Basically, if the reader's read long enough to discover that the story fails because the promise wasn't fulfilled, then the hook was still a success! Heh.

Take your example from earlier, but a little simplified. Let's say you've built up the idea that this is going to be a romance between Character A and Character B, but 2/3's the way through Act 2, suddenly you have zombies appearing and Character B is killed, and the story is now a horror novel or some kind of heroic fantasy where Character A turns into a zombie hunter. You've failed to deliver on the promise for the reader–but the hook worked! Heh.

But as a writer, I need to know the practical application. I need to know how to establish that promise and when to establish it. I need to know how to tell the reader that this is going to be an X, Y, Z kind of story (and those variables may be specific character, general conflict, stakes, whatever; probably, something about the subgenre and story archetype might be revealed by these things also, heh.) I also need to know the best way to do this for any particular story I write, and I suspect that different story types and target audiences might require different approaches.

Now, there's no perfect hook. Despite a huge fanbase, not everyone's going to love HP & the Sorcerer's Stone or The Name of the Wind. But I do think there's a point in a novel, a kind of Rubicon, where you can basically place all the cards on the table so any prospective reader will know what they're in for–or at least have a good idea. And it's okay for some reader not to be hooked. Doesn't mean there isn't a hook. But in order for any one reader to become hooked, that reader needs to know what it's all going to be about, heh. Then let the reader choose whether to continue.

I think we've been discussing these things as if there are perfect hooks, hah, universal shiny things that no one can possibly resist. Or else, as if we need to find ways to trick readers into biting, or to not realize that they've bitten the hook. I do think we need to make persuasive arguments for our story (and what is the lead up to the hook if not a persuasive argument, heh?) so knowing how to best present our story is also a good thing.

 

[Incanus]

@Heliotrope:

How is he using the phrase "reader tension?"

I wonder whether that advice applies more to one type of books than another. When I read Lee Child or Michael Connelly, I expect tension on every page, and that's what the authors deliver. If I'm reading Lord of the Rings, or a Steven Erikson novel, for example, I don't expect it and I'm not sure I want it. Maybe Maas is talking about something different from what I'm thinking about.

I feel that a lot of writing books are geared toward writing best-selling reads of the type you'd take to the beach with you. Fast-paced thrillers, for example. And I like those kinds of books. But while the advice might work in other types of novels as well, I don't think it is required in them in the same way it is in those thrillers. If you're reading the types of books I envision Maas talking about, you're going to expect to see tension on every page and feel let down if it's not there. But for other types of books it may be neither expected nor wanted.

I'm so glad someone brought up this idea. I think this is an important point.

When it comes to best-selling thriller types, you probably can't do better than follow the Donald Maass ideas. But, I've been noticing how a lot of it doesn't apply very well to the novel I'm working on, which falls squarely into the fantasy-adventure category. It's very 'genre'. For lack of a better demographic (or term to describe it), I'd say my book would appeal first and foremost to 'fantasy nerds'.

I've been re-reading (on and off) the Malazan books by Erickson, and if they displayed the 'tension on every page' thing, they would be entirely different books, and probably not the better for it. Much of what I read is like this, which is why Donald Maass often doesn't ring true to me.

The idea of 'too much of a good thing' might apply to tension. Do you want to create drama, or melodrama? Tension is necessary, of course, but it has the possible pitfall of feeling artificial, if not handled well.

 

[Demesnedenoir]

Maas refers to microtension, which is different than simple tension. His thoughts apply to literary, not just thriller or something.

EDIT: And yes it could be taken too far in a hamfisted sort of way. But what he says makes sense if it's applied rationally... at least as I recall, been a while.

 

[Steerpike]

I looked up, via Google, what Maas is talking about. It makes more sense in a certain way, but I'm still not sure I'd apply it to every novel. However, I'm not one to apply any piece of advice to every situation. Part of what is great about literature is the diversity.

 

[Demesnedenoir]

I don't think there is a way to "literally" follow this sort of advice all the time, except in a very specific novel maybe. But microtension can be so subtle you don't know it's there. The bigger issue is when writers miss the opportunity for microtension... this can also relate to issues with cause-effect, or simply zero-conflict, or from talking heads, or on-the-nose dialogue, or from... lots of things. Every novel(ist) uses it, it's a given.

If you look at The Hobbit, and the dwarves start coming for a visit, lots of writers (you see this a lot when people start setting up their books) might have the dwarves show up and we have a civil meeting where Bilbo says I'm your hobbit for the job! But nope, Bilbo doesn't know what the hell is going on. These dwarves are showing up, they're eating him out of house and home, he's worried about his plates and dishes, and everything else. Microtension is everywhere in there, but nothing really dangerous, mostly humerous. Great stuff!

Here's a total classic: It was the best of times, it was the worst of times... microtension on the question, what makes it this way?

Microtension can be as simple as two people having a conversation and they agree 100% (also too common in young writers) compared to one doubting the other person's judgment. Or, it can be how a sentence is structred, making sure cause comes before effect or vice-versa if that works.

I looked up, via Google, what Maas is talking about. It makes more sense in a certain way, but I'm still not sure I'd apply it to every novel. However, I'm not one to apply any piece of advice to every situation. Part of what is great about literature is the diversity.

 

[Steerpike]

Novels use microtension, yes. The advice is that it should be on every page, and I don't agree. Unless you define microtension so broadly that it encompasses everything a writer might do, in which case its usefulness as a concept diminishes substantially.

 

[FifthView]

When, in disgrace with fortune and men's eyes,

(Huh, what's going on here?)

I all alone beweep my outcast state,

(Ok, he weeps when he's feeling disgraced and unfortunate in his life, but what's he saying?)

And trouble deaf heaven with my bootless cries,
And look upon myself, and curse my fate,
Wishing me like to one more rich in hope,
Featur'd like him, like him with friends possess'd,
Desiring this man's art and that man's scope,
With what I most enjoy contented least;
Yet in these thoughts myself almost despising,

(Every line more of the same–but different. Getting a picture of that total state, but where's this going?)

Haply I think on thee, (AHA, when he's feeling like all ^that above, he thinks on her/him) and then my state, (What? What happens when he thinks on her/him?)

Like to the lark at break of day arising

(Well, it's like a lark arising at dawn...)

From sullen earth, sings hymns at heaven's gate;

(Ah, all that sullen state mentioned in first 9 lines "rises," sings, praises heaven...)

For thy sweet love remember'd such wealth brings

(He's explaining what he's just said; but remembering such love does what...?)

That then I scorn to change my state with kings.

(He's basically chiding himself for every time he fell into a puddle of self-pity, while declaring that she/he has always been the antidote. Also: Her/his love is more valuable than everything else–to him.)

___________

Microtension.

 

[FifthView]

Followup to the Shakespeare example....

I think that the root of microtension has something to do with the rollout of information. Information given doesn't give a final answer to what's happening but may add to the picture. What is the significance of this info? Where's it going? –questions a reader might have, although much of the time those aren't consciously asked.

It's a difference between on-the-nose, straight forward delivery of narrative and a style that delays gratification for however long, heh.

Shakespeare's sonnet is something of an extreme example; I'll chalk that up to the nature of poetry. But the same principle applies in prose.

One might do the same extreme sort of manipulation of the prose for an entire story that Shakespeare does in the sonnet, but I think it'd be hard to pull off successfully, and a poor execution could easily annoy a reader.

The general idea is to keep a reader wanting to read forward, to find out where things are going. Even beyond the use of microtension is the rollout of other types of information. E.g., in the mystery novel, the drip-drip-drip of clues, the introduction of new characters who aren't seen completely at first that leaves a reader wondering whether this new person might be the killer, and so forth. Another example: The cliffhanger. What's going to happen on the next page?

Even when something does come to completion, the completed state might introduce new questions about what comes after. Let's say you've spent 2 or 3 chapters getting your characters to the magical artifact they were commanded to secure by the king. Last paragraphs of that span, MC grabs the artifact and tells everyone they need to get back, and everyone's relieved their mission is complete. Reader sighs, because the characters have fought through a lot of obstacles to get to this point. But...what's going to happen now that the artifact has been secured? How's it going to change things? (Presumably, you've already suggested that securing this artifact was a necessity; it has some purpose.) If the MC's hand starts to glow and he falls to the earth writhing in pain when he grabs the artifact, and the glow begins to move throughout his body, heh, you've introduced a whole new can of worms. I.e., questions concerning what will follow.

So....different things can be done to delay gratification, introduce cans of worms, whatever. Where you don't use one, maybe you should be using others. The "tension" of wanting to know where things are going may not need to be the sharp-edged variety Shakespeare used in that sonnet, or not extend for such a length.

 

[FifthView]

Ok, so not sure this works, but I'm on a roll...

Allure

A clue, a hint, a lure:
A straight path or detour?

Once the readers itch,
Do you bait-and-switch
Or offer up the cure?

If the hook's anodyne,
The tension of the line
Makes moot the fishy's twitch,
The splashing of the brine.

 

[Svrtnsse]

Practical application time for me here.

I want to hook my reader into the first story, and I want to use the first story to set up a promise for what the rest of the series is going to be about.

The hook is relatively easy: Will Roy lose the match as he's been requested to, or will he win it? (kinda like in Pulp Fiction).
I'm confident I can set up the hook and establish that as the premise of the story within the first few paragraphs.

The promise is trickier: This story is about a man who drops everything to travel across the world to be with the woman he loves.

How to set that up?
I need to establish that Roy's still hung up on Toini (the woman) in a big way, even though he's thought her dead for nearly a decade (yes, he's got issues).

I think that through the story about the match I'll be able to show parts of Roy's personality that will support the promise. He's stubborn and bitter, but still clings to some kind of moral code where he tries to do what he thinks right.
What I want the reader to understand is that in addition to being hung up on Toini, he's also fed up with his life as a fighter and he wants to retire and live out the rest of his life in peace and quiet. On top of that, he's got a dark secret relating to Toini.

I'm hoping I'll be able to show the above through Roy's interactions with the people around him: his coach and manager, as well as his opponent in the upcoming fight. I've got ideas for things I want to try, but they're still pretty vague - hunches and feelings rather than detailed solutions.

Through it all, setting up the promise will also have to encourage the reader to keep going on the story at hand (the fight).

I don't yet know what to do, but I know I haven't thought about story in this way in the past, and it's really interesting and helpful.

 

[Demesnedenoir]

Most good writers will use microtension inherently and probably danged near every page and often multiple times per page. Maas didn't hit on the uber secret to all writing, it's been around for a long time, he's just trying to explain it in another way and gave it his own name. In modern writing, I'd be curious to see a page without microtension. I might have to poke into some books to see how long it takes to find a page without it.

But it is not everything a writer can do, because one can certainly write without it.

Novels use microtension, yes. The advice is that it should be on every page, and I don't agree. Unless you define microtension so broadly that it encompasses everything a writer might do, in which case its usefulness as a concept diminishes substantially.

 

[Heliotrope]

Hi everyone! I've been camping all weekend, but now I'm back

Ok, I would argue that micro-tension on every page is actually MORE prevalent in literary fiction than genre fiction. I would argue that micro-tension is actually a tool of the literary writer because it is what he/she uses to keep the reader riveted to the most mundane scene.

If I'm just limited to first lines (and I'll get to longer passages in a minute):

In my younger and more vulnerable years my father gave me some advice that I've been turning over in my mind ever since.
- The Great Gatsby, F. Scott Fitzgerald

*Remember, in the way we are discussion, tension does not mean conflict. Tension refers to "raising a question so the reader has to keep reading to find the answer." The above opening line is a perfect example.

Many years later, as he faced the firing squad, Colonel Aureliano Buendia was to remember that distant afternoon when his father took him to discover ice.
- Gabriel Garcia Marquez, One Hundred Years of Solitude

Snowman wakes before dawn.
- Margaret Atwood, Oryx and Crake

Pretty much 80% of my home library is literary fiction. That's what I prefer to read. Almost all of it has wonderful (I'd say better than genre) examples of micro-tension. Artful examples. Literary authors are masters at doling out microtension and making you not even realize it is there.

I'll pull out a longer description. Now remember, this is literary fiction. It is harder to read than genre fiction, and to many may appear "boring"... however, look for the masterful examples of microtension:

It was inevitable: the scent of bitter almonds always reminded him of the fate of unrequited love. Dr. Juvenal Urbino noticed it as soon as he entered the still darkened home where he had hurried on an urgent call to attend a case that for him had lost all urgency many years before. The Antillean refugee Jeremiah de Saint Amour, disabled war veteran, photographer of children, and his most sympathetic opponent in chess, had escaped the torments of memory with the aromatic fumes of gold cyanide.

- Gabriel Garcia Marquez, Love In The Time Of Cholera (Nobel Prize winner).

Ok, notice how many questions he raises in this first paragraph, and doesn't answer any of them?

Four sentences and at least four questions raised. Each sentence acts as another hook, dragging you in deeper. Each sentence is it's own example of "microtension"....

It was inevitable: the scent of bitter almonds always reminded him of the fate of unrequited love.
- Two questions raised in the first sentence alone. What was inevitable? And why do almonds remind him of unrequited love?

Dr. Juvenal Urbino noticed it as soon as he entered the still darkened home where he had hurried on an urgent call to attend a case that for him had lost all urgency many years before.
- Why had this call lost urgency for him? Has he dealt with this same person before? What is wrong with this person?

The Antillean refugee Jeremiah de Saint Amour, disabled war veteran, photographer of children, and his most sympathetic opponent in chess, had escaped the torments of memory with the aromatic fumes of gold cyanide.

- so the guy killed himself with cyanide. Why? Because of unrequited love? What happened?

You get the idea.

Masterful use of microtension. And it carries on, tens or hundreds of examples on every page.

 

[Aurora]

No offense but if I had to constantly worry about micro-tension this, raise the stakes that, micro-tension instead of conflict and hooks on every page then I'd probably never write. Just thinking about it all gives me a headache. It makes me freeze. To each their own but I've yet to find Maas' advice helpful in any way.

I can't speak for literary fiction because it's not what I read and I know next to nothing about it. I read lots of genre fiction and it's what I write. There's something to be said for learning your genre really well via reading and studying it. We all write fantasy scifi here but for different audiences, right? Some write epic fantasy, others write grimdark, and so forth. I think having a strong understanding of the expectations of those audiences is the smartest thing any writer of genre fiction can do. What tropes are used in these books? What conflicts are most prevalent? Epic fantasy is going to have a different set of rules than grimdark, for instance. I'm about to start book 1 of an epic fantasy series for Nano July and it's a different undertaking than my normal sword and sorcery books. They require absolutely unique approaches to character, plot, and setting.

Not to disregard any of the discussion here because I find it interesting, but all of this thrown it just takes the fun out of writing for me. Give me character, plot, and an idea of how it ends and I'll write the best story I can. I'll learn from it and write an even better story next time.

Everything else just makes me freeze like a deer in headlights.

 

[Demesnedenoir]

I'd say you use it and don't know it, LOL. How much is the question. If you literally never used it, it would be astounding. And it's not necessary to worry about it until the edit anyhow, or not at all, if you use it inherently. I sure don't write thinking to myself... microtension, microtension... In fact, I never think that way. But if I go over my writing, it's there, much like the modern 3-act structure, I don't plot it, but it's there.

Don't worry about unless readers say something is flat, then the concept of microtension (or whatever other name could be used) might prove useful as an analytic approach.

No offense but if I had to constantly worry about micro-tension this, raise the stakes that, micro-tension instead of conflict and hooks on every page then I'd probably never write. Just thinking about it all gives me a headache. It makes me freeze. To each their own but I've yet to find Maas' advice helpful in any way.

I can't speak for literary fiction because it's not what I read and I know next to nothing about it. I read lots of genre fiction and it's what I write. There's something to be said for learning your genre really well via reading and studying it. We all write fantasy scifi here but for different audiences, right? Some write epic fantasy, others write grimdark, and so forth. I think having a strong understanding of the expectations of those audiences is the smartest thing any writer of genre fiction can do. What tropes are used in these books? What conflicts are most prevalent? Epic fantasy is going to have a different set of rules than grimdark, for instance. I'm about to start book 1 of an epic fantasy series for Nano July and it's a different undertaking than my normal sword and sorcery books. They require absolutely unique approaches to character, plot, and setting.

Not to disregard any of the discussion here because I find it interesting, but all of this thrown it just takes the fun out of writing for me. Give me character, plot, and an idea of how it ends and I'll write the best story I can. I'll learn from it and write an even better story next time.

Everything else just makes me freeze like a deer in headlights.

 

[Aurora]

I'd say you use it and don't know it, LOL. How much is the question. If you literally never used it, it would be astounding. And it's not necessary to worry about it until the edit anyhow, or not at all, if you use it inherently. I sure don't write thinking to myself... microtension, microtension... In fact, I never think that way. But if I go over my writing, it's there, much like the modern 3-act structure, I don't plot it, but it's there.

Don't worry about unless readers say something is flat, then the concept of microtension (or whatever other name could be used) might prove useful as an analytic approach.

Mmmm...maybe. I focus more on tension between characters and try to end my chapters in cliffhangers. Not always though since some chapters need to be breathers. So, cliffhangers for the most part. My books also start slow and increase in conflict and speed as the story develops. They're well reviewed and received so guess it's working so far.

 

[Heliotrope]

@ Aurora,

The discussion is helpful for those interested in analyzing this sort of thing. It's helpful to us. It is interesting to us. It is something some of us do think about while writing or editing. This is a forum for fantasy writers, true, but as writers we are entitled to discuss whatever topic we find interesting and valuable to us.

This topic is not an attack on how you do things. If you don't find it palatable to take into consideration then don't.

 

[Aurora]

@ Aurora,

The discussion is helpful for those interested in analyzing this sort of thing. It's helpful to us. It is interesting to us. It is something some of us do think about while writing or editing. This is a forum for fantasy writers, true, but as writers we are entitled to discuss whatever topic we find interesting and valuable to us.

This topic is not an attack on how you do things. If you don't find it palatable to take into consideration then don't.

Wow. I was not attacking. You're jumping to conclusions. I was simply voicing my opinion on the matter and discussing things/trying to be a part of the conversation. Since I'm not welcome to do that, then so be it. Attacking is what you're doing. Why be rude? Why not welcome ALL viewpoints?