How to deal with two "chosen ones"?

[somerandomkid]

I have a story that, so far, has two chosen ones. Neither was created naturally; one by cult ritual and the other by specific experimental breeding of a part-angel human and a part-devil human.

Essentially, the one created by ritual (D) was raised to be the messiah for the isolated cult he grew up in. He escapes and spends a year running through the wilderness (and eventually countryside) until he reaches the capital city, where the other chosen one (C) is raised like a princess while her father cultivates her powers for his own gain.

The problem I have is that I can't figure out where to go with this idea. Both of them are essentially covert main characters. What do I do? Anything helps.

 

[Avery Moore]

Ah! This is a very interesting idea. I've played around a lot with the idea of alternative "chosen one" narratives but don't think I've ever seen the idea of two "chosen ones" come up before (unless they were siblings or something). I have a few ideas of directions you could go with this:

• Enemy Chosen Ones: Basically, in their chosen one prophesies, it is foretold that the two will be mortal enemies, where one must kill the other in order for their prophecy to come true. Would be even more interesting if they ended up becoming friends, because then they obviously wouldn't want to fulfil the prophecy, but unfortunately, prophecies can't be unprophecied, and it's going to come true no matter how hard they tried to stop it.
  
• Conflicting Chosen Ones: So, they are definitely both chosen ones... The only problem is that they're both supposed to be the same chosen one, created for the same purpose, supposed to fulfil the same prophecy. And only one of them can actually do it... What a pickle.
• Unconventional Chosen Ones: So, the super magic special world saving thing that the chosen ones were supposed to do... Well, they do it, but not in the way that everyone expected them to. Like, you know how the prophecy said that the chosen one would "Put an end to the Baddy McEvil family name?" Well, you all assumed that meant he was going to kill Emperor Baddy McEvil. Instead, what actually happened was that he married Baddy McEvil's only daughter (causing her to change her family name to his) and then became an evil emperor himself... Really should've read that small print in that prophecy.
• Fake Chosen Ones: So... You know how you guys were supposed to fulfil these epic prophecies to save the world and bring about peace and harmony for generations to come... Yeah, turns out those prophecies were made by some random homeless guy who was super high on shrooms at the time, and there's a possibility that those epic prophecies might have been completely made up. Guess you're both just regular, normal kids after all. My bad.

There's a whole lot of different things you could do with a story like this, but I think what you really want to do is think about what you want to do with your two main characters. What their personalities are, how you want them to grow and develop, what you want their relationship to be, and then work your plan around that.

 

[Rosemary Tea]

What are these chosen ones chosen for?

That's the most basic question. Everything else depends on that.

 

[Mad Swede]

You know, I think I'd ask myself what would happen when they met. How do they meet? How does he feels, does he admit who and what he is? Or is he trying to start a new life somewhere else? As for the other one, when does she realise what her father is doing? How does that affect her and her self-image? what does she choose to do? Do both of them decide to give the chosen one thing a miss? And if they do, does anyone come after them?

 

[pmmg]

There can be only one

Seems to me, if they are male and female, they could team up.

 

[Rosemary Tea]

There can be only one

Seems to me, if they are male and female, they could team up.

Why do they have to be male and female to team up?

They apparently are in this story, but a team can be any combination of genders.

If they are both chosen to accomplish the same task, maybe they both contribute to accomplishing it, but in different ways. Maybe even accidentally.

Or maybe they're not chosen for the same task. Maybe they're at cross purposes.

 

[Eduardo Ficaria]

The description you've given, somerandomkid , makes me think of your characters more as "champions" rather than "chosen ones". I mean, they're "chosen ones" just for the people who created or raised them, the rest of the world doesn't have to know anything about them nor have reasons to believe that they're "chosen ones". So, following this idea, you could have not just one or two champions but several, and that would be the mistery at the bottom of the story: Why so many champions, or special individuals chosen/raised by different peoples around the world, happen to appear at that certain moment in time? All of them have special skills or knowledge that, when put together, seem to point to a certain "something" that could be anything from opening a portal to another dimension, to help the restoration of the power of some god, or to prepare the world for fighting back an invasion by some eldritch world-eating aliens, etc. So the story could go the usual path of self-discovery and of crossing paths with the other champions, while they figure out what's the meaning of their powers and find hints of that deeper mistery that links them all.

 

[pmmg]

When there are a million possibilities, and one is suggested, that does not eliminate all the others. And they of different genders, no point in talking about them in a different context.

 

[skip.knox]

>The problem I have is that I can't figure out where to go with this idea.

You have said what others want of these two, but you don't say anything about what the characters themselves want. I note that the male has some agency--he ran away, rejecting his role. The female is pure victim at this point, being used by her father.

I would concentrate on the characters more than on the chosen-ness. D ran away. Why? Was he abused? Did he object on moral grounds because that's what teenagers do? I'm presuming the age here. Or did he hear of a princess in a distant land who had powers reminiscent of his own, or who was talked about in the same terms as himself and he wants to go find her? Whatever his desires and goals, don't let him get them. Throw roadblocks. Those are going to be of two types, incidental and intentional. The former is of the "a bear jumps out" type. You can use these to move the plot along, show off aspects of the character and his skills, or just add depth to the world. The latter comes from someone who wants to stop him. You'll have to come up with reasons for your villains, too.

The princess has plenty of potential. Her type appears in hundreds of stories, but you have to put some flesh on her bones. What does she want? Maybe she is an obedient daughter and doesn't mind that her father profits from her abilities. But she longs to see the world, or she falls in love with a local boy (or girl, human or otherwise). OTOH, she might be coming to realize there are sinister aspects to what her father is doing. She tries to stop it. Tries to make her father be more moral. Others in the royal court might see her as a useful pawn or ally. Lots of opportunity for palace intrigue.

Or, she might run away herself, in a moment of fury and anguish. Or cold-blooded planning. She intends to do something, go find someone, whatever. Regardless of whether she stays or goes, the point about roadblocks applies here too.

In short, you don't have any characters yet (at least not from the brief description), you have types and roles. And that's why you're having trouble figuring out where to go next.

 

[somerandomkid]

Ah! This is a very interesting idea. I've played around a lot with the idea of alternative "chosen one" narratives but don't think I've ever seen the idea of two "chosen ones" come up before (unless they were siblings or something). I have a few ideas of directions you could go with this:

• Enemy Chosen Ones: Basically, in their chosen one prophesies, it is foretold that the two will be mortal enemies, where one must kill the other in order for their prophecy to come true. Would be even more interesting if they ended up becoming friends, because then they obviously wouldn't want to fulfil the prophecy, but unfortunately, prophecies can't be unprophecied, and it's going to come true no matter how hard they tried to stop it.
  
• Conflicting Chosen Ones: So, they are definitely both chosen ones... The only problem is that they're both supposed to be the same chosen one, created for the same purpose, supposed to fulfil the same prophecy. And only one of them can actually do it... What a pickle.
• Unconventional Chosen Ones: So, the super magic special world saving thing that the chosen ones were supposed to do... Well, they do it, but not in the way that everyone expected them to. Like, you know how the prophecy said that the chosen one would "Put an end to the Baddy McEvil family name?" Well, you all assumed that meant he was going to kill Emperor Baddy McEvil. Instead, what actually happened was that he married Baddy McEvil's only daughter (causing her to change her family name to his) and then became an evil emperor himself... Really should've read that small print in that prophecy.
• Fake Chosen Ones: So... You know how you guys were supposed to fulfil these epic prophecies to save the world and bring about peace and harmony for generations to come... Yeah, turns out those prophecies were made by some random homeless guy who was super high on shrooms at the time, and there's a possibility that those epic prophecies might have been completely made up. Guess you're both just regular, normal kids after all. My bad.

There's a whole lot of different things you could do with a story like this, but I think what you really want to do is think about what you want to do with your two main characters. What their personalities are, how you want them to grow and develop, what you want their relationship to be, and then work your plan around that.

Wow, thank you so much! I appreciate the detailed reply! I was thinking D would have a redemption arc caused by C. D is a jaded and traumatized person and C is a neglected kid. Maybe their relationship could develop into a father-daughter bond which would really complicate everything!

 

[somerandomkid]

You know, I think I'd ask myself what would happen when they met. How do they meet? How does he feels, does he admit who and what he is? Or is he trying to start a new life somewhere else? As for the other one, when does she realise what her father is doing? How does that affect her and her self-image? what does she choose to do? Do both of them decide to give the chosen one thing a miss? And if they do, does anyone come after them?

I never thought about them avoiding the chosen one thing altogether! You've given me a lot to think about, thank you for the reply!

 

[somerandomkid]

The description you've given, somerandomkid , makes me think of your characters more as "champions" rather than "chosen ones". I mean, they're "chosen ones" just for the people who created or raised them, the rest of the world doesn't have to know anything about them nor have reasons to believe that they're "chosen ones". So, following this idea, you could have not just one or two champions but several, and that would be the mistery at the bottom of the story: Why so many champions, or special individuals chosen/raised by different peoples around the world, happen to appear at that certain moment in time? All of them have special skills or knowledge that, when put together, seem to point to a certain "something" that could be anything from opening a portal to another dimension, to help the restoration of the power of some god, or to prepare the world for fighting back an invasion by some eldritch world-eating aliens, etc. So the story could go the usual path of self-discovery and of crossing paths with the other champions, while they figure out what's the meaning of their powers and find hints of that deeper mistery that links them all.

Whoa, I didn't think about it like that! Thank you. That's definitely a path I'd want to go down. The concept of everyone eventually getting together and figuring out how to do the thing they were all created to do is so cool!

 

[somerandomkid]

>The problem I have is that I can't figure out where to go with this idea.

You have said what others want of these two, but you don't say anything about what the characters themselves want. I note that the male has some agency--he ran away, rejecting his role. The female is pure victim at this point, being used by her father.

I would concentrate on the characters more than on the chosen-ness. D ran away. Why? Was he abused? Did he object on moral grounds because that's what teenagers do? I'm presuming the age here. Or did he hear of a princess in a distant land who had powers reminiscent of his own, or who was talked about in the same terms as himself and he wants to go find her? Whatever his desires and goals, don't let him get them. Throw roadblocks. Those are going to be of two types, incidental and intentional. The former is of the "a bear jumps out" type. You can use these to move the plot along, show off aspects of the character and his skills, or just add depth to the world. The latter comes from someone who wants to stop him. You'll have to come up with reasons for your villains, too.

The princess has plenty of potential. Her type appears in hundreds of stories, but you have to put some flesh on her bones. What does she want? Maybe she is an obedient daughter and doesn't mind that her father profits from her abilities. But she longs to see the world, or she falls in love with a local boy (or girl, human or otherwise). OTOH, she might be coming to realize there are sinister aspects to what her father is doing. She tries to stop it. Tries to make her father be more moral. Others in the royal court might see her as a useful pawn or ally. Lots of opportunity for palace intrigue.

Or, she might run away herself, in a moment of fury and anguish. Or cold-blooded planning. She intends to do something, go find someone, whatever. Regardless of whether she stays or goes, the point about roadblocks applies here too.

In short, you don't have any characters yet (at least not from the brief description), you have types and roles. And that's why you're having trouble figuring out where to go next.

Thank you for the advice! D and C are a little more fleshed out than I mentioned in the original post, but I do agree that both of them lack motivation and true characterization. I think the biggest problem with C is that she is about 10, which may have been a mistake on my part since she lacks the agency that the other characters have. However, I will take what you said to heart. Thank you for replying!

 

[Rosemary Tea]

I think the biggest problem with C is that she is about 10, which may have been a mistake on my part since she lacks the agency that the other characters have.

How long a period of time does your story cover? Will it be long enough for C to grow up?

If not, then her side of the story would read as a children's story. There are plenty of children's stories with a ten-year-old (or thereabouts) protagonist who goes on some great adventure, who has an age appropriate level of agency. For a girl raised as a princess, that could be the time in her life when that suddenly changes, for some reason.

Writing that out made me think of A Little Princess. The movie versions condense the story, so the whole thing happens when Sara is around 10-11, but in the book, she goes away to school at the age of seven, lives there in luxury for several years, and then learns on her eleventh birthday that her father has suddenly died and she's a pauper. Boom, her life changes. Now she has to take charge of her situation to get through it, which she does through imagination.

Or, to think of another fictional character that age, Pippi Longstocking. If you're familiar with that story, no one could say she lacks agency.

Maybe for C, ten is the age when she learns she's the chosen one.

 

[somerandomkid]

How long a period of time does your story cover? Will it be long enough for C to grow up?

If not, then her side of the story would read as a children's story. There are plenty of children's stories with a ten-year-old (or thereabouts) protagonist who goes on some great adventure, who has an age appropriate level of agency. For a girl raised as a princess, that could be the time in her life when that suddenly changes, for some reason.

Writing that out made me think of A Little Princess. The movie versions condense the story, so the whole thing happens when Sara is around 10-11, but in the book, she goes away to school at the age of seven, lives there in luxury for several years, and then learns on her eleventh birthday that her father has suddenly died and she's a pauper. Boom, her life changes. Now she has to take charge of her situation to get through it, which she does through imagination.

Or, to think of another fictional character that age, Pippi Longstocking. If you're familiar with that story, no one could say she lacks agency.

Maybe for C, ten is the age when she learns she's the chosen one.

I haven't actually given a thought to the span of time the story would cover. It'd be a good idea to have it take years however, so that C can grow up, have agency, and then we have the added bonus of seeing her mature. There is a comic I love called "Because I'm Depressed" where all the characters age up in real time, including the (originally seven, now 15) daughter of the family. That isn't the "shtick" of the comic, but I think it's a great "mechanic" because it gives the audience a warm fuzzy feeling while watching her achieve things. A Little Princess sounds exactly like the kind of book I would have loved as a child. And I love Pippi Longstocking! Thank you for the advice

 

[ThinkerX]

My take:

'D' is expected by his creators to bring about the return or ascendance of their deity, who'd then reign supreme with the cult leaders as his favored lackies. Way, I'd do this is while D is essential to bringing the deity back or ensuring his ascendance, he doesn't survive the process. D fled out of self-preservation. That said, D and the deity are linked, with D experiencing the Gods thoughts and absorbing a portion of the deity's powers.

'C' was spawned from opposites. Way I'd do this is, these opposites were once one united group (as per the biblical legend that Satan and the devils were once angels.) Way, way back, either right before or right after the split, the angels and demons collaborated to do something: they sealed a portal to some other realm or locked away an especially dangerous relic or abomination. The only way to open this portal/vault/prison is to have a demon and angel collaborate - or have a being who partakes of both essences. Were it me, whatever is locked away in that vault or cell is something that would either greatly benefit or potentially be lethal to D's deity. Complicating matters are a multitude of directly contradictory or altered texts about what is actually locked up.

Either way, both D and C find themselves drawn to some place or object instrumental to finding this portal, vault, or cell, and they and their handlers are flabbergasted that each can find/manipulate it.

 

[Eduardo Ficaria]

Whoa, I didn't think about it like that! Thank you. That's definitely a path I'd want to go down. The concept of everyone eventually getting together and figuring out how to do the thing they were all created to do is so cool!

Glad you liked the idea. Just one extra thing about the "getting together" part. Each "champion/chosen-one" character should have their own agenda or purpose, maybe just a personal thing or ambition, or something favouring their own people, and those interests won't align perfectly (if at all). So yes, eventually they may get together but only on specific moments of the story, and they'll cooperate to do something relevant for the bigger underlying story arc, although not necessarily in friendly terms. And also the outcome of their actions together must have consequences on how they relate to each other and how their personal goals or interests are affected. These frictions will allow you to keep their relationships, interests, loyalties and so on somewhat fluid, giving you chances for surprising your reader with shifts in the "factions" you build with your characters. On this respect, you should be careful to give some hints to your readers about how those changes may happen, so they don't feel illogical or out-of-the-blue ideas.

 

[somerandomkid]

My take:

'D' is expected by his creators to bring about the return or ascendance of their deity, who'd then reign supreme with the cult leaders as his favored lackies. Way, I'd do this is while D is essential to bringing the deity back or ensuring his ascendance, he doesn't survive the process. D fled out of self-preservation. That said, D and the deity are linked, with D experiencing the Gods thoughts and absorbing a portion of the deity's powers.

'C' was spawned from opposites. Way I'd do this is, these opposites were once one united group (as per the biblical legend that Satan and the devils were once angels.) Way, way back, either right before or right after the split, the angels and demons collaborated to do something: they sealed a portal to some other realm or locked away an especially dangerous relic or abomination. The only way to open this portal/vault/prison is to have a demon and angel collaborate - or have a being who partakes of both essences. Were it me, whatever is locked away in that vault or cell is something that would either greatly benefit or potentially be lethal to D's deity. Complicating matters are a multitude of directly contradictory or altered texts about what is actually locked up.

Either way, both D and C find themselves drawn to some place or object instrumental to finding this portal, vault, or cell, and they and their handlers are flabbergasted that each can find/manipulate it.

WOW!!! I'm so excited!! Thank you so much for your reply!! You actually managed to guess many aspects of the worldbuilding I had not mentioned in my original post for brevity's sake! Simultaneously, you have filled several plot holes that have been bothering me for about a year.

In my universe, demons are in fact fallen angels. The thing is, however, that there were so many angels who fell that they started to burst out of Hell and terrorize humanity. In response, the mother goddess sealed them away in "a place beyond mind" and gave the 'key' to this place to her acolytes to keep safe. The key could only be accessed by a dangerous and taxing ritual that was passed down through generations. Eventually, it reached an unworthy acolyte who allowed the demons to escape after they tricked him. This time, the angels had to intervene and the mother goddess' acolytes were shunned entirely, quickly becoming an isolated cult. The mother goddess fell asleep unexpectedly and the angels, not knowing what to do, destroyed a large portion of demons and sealed the rest of them away (again). The result of their indecision was that the demons had time to populate the earth with demon-human monsters. Fast forward about 1,000 years and about 40% of the population of the planet has demonic ancestry (essentially making them spooky elves rather than monsters), D is the new heir to the 'key' to the place beyond mind, and a nearly angelic princess (C) is born right as D leaves the cult.

Anyway-- I don't want to talk your ear off (in a visual format?) so I won't dive into the rest of the lore. I hope my rambling made sense, and I hope I didn't overwhelm you with that whole paragraph! I'm just very excited. I really appreciate your reply. I hope you don't mind me incorporating your thoughts into my story!

 

[somerandomkid]

Glad you liked the idea. Just one extra thing about the "getting together" part. Each "champion/chosen-one" character should have their own agenda or purpose, maybe just a personal thing or ambition, or something favouring their own people, and those interests won't align perfectly (if at all). So yes, eventually they may get together but only on specific moments of the story, and they'll cooperate to do something relevant for the bigger underlying story arc, although not necessarily in friendly terms. .

Thank you so much That reminds me of "The Blade Itself" and the other books in that trilogy. I really recommend it if you like high fantasy political dramas! Thanks again for the reply!

 

[ThinkerX]

WOW!!! I'm so excited!! Thank you so much for your reply!! You actually managed to guess many aspects of the worldbuilding I had not mentioned in my original post for brevity's sake! Simultaneously, you have filled several plot holes that have been bothering me for about a year.

In my universe, demons are in fact fallen angels. The thing is, however, that there were so many angels who fell that they started to burst out of Hell and terrorize humanity. In response, the mother goddess sealed them away in "a place beyond mind" and gave the 'key' to this place to her acolytes to keep safe. The key could only be accessed by a dangerous and taxing ritual that was passed down through generations. Eventually, it reached an unworthy acolyte who allowed the demons to escape after they tricked him. This time, the angels had to intervene and the mother goddess' acolytes were shunned entirely, quickly becoming an isolated cult. The mother goddess fell asleep unexpectedly and the angels, not knowing what to do, destroyed a large portion of demons and sealed the rest of them away (again). The result of their indecision was that the demons had time to populate the earth with demon-human monsters. Fast forward about 1,000 years and about 40% of the population of the planet has demonic ancestry (essentially making them spooky elves rather than monsters), D is the new heir to the 'key' to the place beyond mind, and a nearly angelic princess (C) is born right as D leaves the cult.

Anyway-- I don't want to talk your ear off (in a visual format?) so I won't dive into the rest of the lore. I hope my rambling made sense, and I hope I didn't overwhelm you with that whole paragraph! I'm just very excited. I really appreciate your reply. I hope you don't mind me incorporating your thoughts into my story!

Go right ahead.