Honestly, I love it when sacrifices are more internal and personal like this.
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Personal and Heroic Sacrifices
- Thread starter TheCrystallineEntity
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Honestly, I love it when sacrifices are more internal and personal like this.
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- #22
TheCrystallineEntity
Istar
The thing is, the information about the being is mythical and patchwork-y at best, so part of her journey is finding out what it really is and where it came from.
yeah, so I guess in a scenario like that I would really consider's FifthView's points about how her not sacrificing herself like the others would create some major inner conflict.
- does she struggle with her choice? how?
- does she have self doubt?
- What repercussions have come from her NOT sacrificing herself? In mine it means the gate is open so people go missing, and monsters are able to come out.
Really think about the inner and outer turmoil that her choice has made and how that could be applied to a character arc that helps drive her choices and actions.
- does she struggle with her choice? how?
- does she have self doubt?
- What repercussions have come from her NOT sacrificing herself? In mine it means the gate is open so people go missing, and monsters are able to come out.
Really think about the inner and outer turmoil that her choice has made and how that could be applied to a character arc that helps drive her choices and actions.
I've read this sort of plot line in fantasy stories before (on a smaller scale but very similar) and it was always tied into how the hero/heroine was the chosen one and they had to save the world, essentially. So...I'd say that if your mc is faced with this task of saving the world, she better take the challenge, otherwise there won't be any story. What could happen is she sacrifices herself but also saves herself and there's loads of conflict that could come from that.
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- #25
TheCrystallineEntity
Istar
There's too much that they don't know. One of the characters is skeptical that the world even needs saving, that the being in question is even malevolent at all.
Ok, I'm not really clear on what you are asking? Are you asking for plot help? Or inner conflict help? Or whether we think it's a good idea or not?
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- #27
TheCrystallineEntity
Istar
I'm just clarifying bits of the plot that might be important to mention in the discussion.
What truly matters is what your heroine thinks and how she reacts to what's being put on her. If she's the last one to be sacrificed but doesn't want to die because of whatever reasons, this should spark a drive in her to figure out another way to save the world, thus saving herself in the process.
Ok then, yeah, I think you have a lot of material to work with here for inner and outer conflict and stakes. Ten people killed themselves for a cause they felt was worth killing themselves for, and one girl doesn't do it because she wants to chase the very remote possibility that there may be another way. I like it. I think you can play with her inner struggle about the choice in very interesting ways.
Yep. ^^^^^^ all this.
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- #31
TheCrystallineEntity
Istar
Funnily enough, the scene I just wrote awhile ago mirrors our discussion:
I awaken with a start, but then lie silently in the darkness, pretending to be asleep. I peek out from under a fold in the blanket, and listen.
We could leave the planet. Aleta is standing in front of the window, and the faint glow of the noxlight outside eerily illuminates their features. Thana, who is hovering beside them, is as calm and unmoved as ever, does not reply. Aleta turns their head a bit to the side, as if looking out of the corner of their eye, despite the permanence of the blindfold. We could go anywhere. The tone of their voice hints towards that course of action.
We could indeed...and in doing so, leave the beings here to their fate. Thana’s voice is perfectly neutral.
We could still leave, and hide somewhere. Aleta continues, completely undeterred. But whether we leave or stay, will anything change?
The outcome would be the same. There is a heaviness to Thana’s voice that is distinctly unnerving, almost akin to grief.
I am greatly disturbed by their words and their tone, and try to escape into sleep. I drift in a light, uncomfortable half-sleep, barely aware of anything around me. In the midst of this seemingly unending, nightmarish state, I am gripped with a sudden conviction: there must be another way. I awaken amid a twisted panic, convinced that I somehow slept for three cycle straight, that the Final Sealing is looming over me, that there is nothing I can do. I flail around, helplessly entangled in my blanket, my body blazing, near feverish from my useless struggle. It is like a river that has been blocked for most of my life has finally broken free within me: before, I was a wooden doll, docile and complacent, but now...what am I now?
I awaken with a start, but then lie silently in the darkness, pretending to be asleep. I peek out from under a fold in the blanket, and listen.
We could leave the planet. Aleta is standing in front of the window, and the faint glow of the noxlight outside eerily illuminates their features. Thana, who is hovering beside them, is as calm and unmoved as ever, does not reply. Aleta turns their head a bit to the side, as if looking out of the corner of their eye, despite the permanence of the blindfold. We could go anywhere. The tone of their voice hints towards that course of action.
We could indeed...and in doing so, leave the beings here to their fate. Thana’s voice is perfectly neutral.
We could still leave, and hide somewhere. Aleta continues, completely undeterred. But whether we leave or stay, will anything change?
The outcome would be the same. There is a heaviness to Thana’s voice that is distinctly unnerving, almost akin to grief.
I am greatly disturbed by their words and their tone, and try to escape into sleep. I drift in a light, uncomfortable half-sleep, barely aware of anything around me. In the midst of this seemingly unending, nightmarish state, I am gripped with a sudden conviction: there must be another way. I awaken amid a twisted panic, convinced that I somehow slept for three cycle straight, that the Final Sealing is looming over me, that there is nothing I can do. I flail around, helplessly entangled in my blanket, my body blazing, near feverish from my useless struggle. It is like a river that has been blocked for most of my life has finally broken free within me: before, I was a wooden doll, docile and complacent, but now...what am I now?
Yeah, good stuff.
Nimue
Auror
I agree with Chess and Helio that this works—I might add that it would be particularly sympathetic if this character is younger, in mentality or years. And make sure you give her concrete desires and things to live for, rather than just the idea of living on.
Strangely enough, I have the opposite problem in the plot of my WIP, where someone must sacrifice themselves to complete a countercurse and the heroine has the chance to ask others to share that sacrifice, so that many people would lose a little of their lifespan, rather than one entire life, but she chooses to go to her death instead. I’m not sure at this point that her motivations hold up—I originally had her almost completely isolated in the third act, but now there’s a point where she’s facing people who care about her and the man she’s trying to save, and she still says nothing. Part of it is that this is a last-chance effort and she’s not wholly certain splitting the sacrifice will work—there were three other sacrifices of blood and flesh that she faced alone—and part of it is that she’s unwilling to ask others, people with families and communities, to give up part of their lives. They might also try to stop her, and she needs this ritual to succeed. She also fears be accused of sorcery and losing their trust—sorcery deals in blood/life taken from unwilling victims (consent is a big theme in this story). And she’s severely depressed after, for complicated reasons, the last ritual resulted in the curse falling on her lover prematurely, which was one of the main things she was trying to prevent. It feels like doomsday has already come for her.
Yeesh. Should probably start a new thread or something. But I really want to make her choice awful but sympathetic, rather than something the reader is frustrated by. Feedback is welcome... but I probably won’t know if it works until I’ve written those scenes.
Strangely enough, I have the opposite problem in the plot of my WIP, where someone must sacrifice themselves to complete a countercurse and the heroine has the chance to ask others to share that sacrifice, so that many people would lose a little of their lifespan, rather than one entire life, but she chooses to go to her death instead. I’m not sure at this point that her motivations hold up—I originally had her almost completely isolated in the third act, but now there’s a point where she’s facing people who care about her and the man she’s trying to save, and she still says nothing. Part of it is that this is a last-chance effort and she’s not wholly certain splitting the sacrifice will work—there were three other sacrifices of blood and flesh that she faced alone—and part of it is that she’s unwilling to ask others, people with families and communities, to give up part of their lives. They might also try to stop her, and she needs this ritual to succeed. She also fears be accused of sorcery and losing their trust—sorcery deals in blood/life taken from unwilling victims (consent is a big theme in this story). And she’s severely depressed after, for complicated reasons, the last ritual resulted in the curse falling on her lover prematurely, which was one of the main things she was trying to prevent. It feels like doomsday has already come for her.
Yeesh. Should probably start a new thread or something. But I really want to make her choice awful but sympathetic, rather than something the reader is frustrated by. Feedback is welcome... but I probably won’t know if it works until I’ve written those scenes.
- Thread starter
- #34
TheCrystallineEntity
Istar
^My heroine is not quite a child but not quite an adult, either.
Your story sounds fascinating. It definitely sounds like something I'd like to read.
Your story sounds fascinating. It definitely sounds like something I'd like to read.
Sacrifices, I think, are more effective if they come from within the characters. It needs to be something that changes them emotionally, spiritually, forever. This change comes from the struggle they endure in the plot. Along the way they continually lose a bit of themselves until they realize they are a different person--for the better. It's one of the reasons why I love writing romances so much. There's nothing more self-sacrificing than giving your life for the one you love. This can happen in many ways but ultimately I think story is about change and sacrifice. There's a delicious one in my WIP that I hope to do justice.
This is very important. Often time the inner conflict is there but the stakes aren't high enough so the choice can come off as not as powerful as it should. She definitely should have a concrete reason for staying, besides just "but there must be another way." Does she have a friend she can't leave? A sibling? A job to do? A promise to keep? In mine the woman is pregnant, so she chooses her baby knowing full well the world is going to go to shit and her baby is likely going to go with it, but she just can't bring herself to harm it.
This is a super important thing to consider.
Yeah, I had change in my WIP but this thread has really made me deeply analyze the role of sacrifice. I had an idea of sacrifice, but after this thread I realize where the weaknesses are and why it was bugging me so much.
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- #38
TheCrystallineEntity
Istar
^My heroine's actually planning on leaving to find answers, not staying,
No, I mean a concrete reason NOT to sacrifice herself. I don't mean to stay. I get that she is leaving to find answers.
She makes the choice not to sacrifice herself. She makes the choice to leave, instead, and go find answers.
There needs to be a concrete reason why. External stakes. Something she loves and is connected to. Simply a "feeling" of "there has to be another way" is not enough. There needs to be a visceral, personal reason why she chooses to go after a mythical story instead of doing what everyone else believes is right.
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- #40
TheCrystallineEntity
Istar
Oh, now I get it, thanks.
