If a genie was able to grant you three wishes...

[Philip Overby]

@Starconstant: I've been studying Japanese on and off for about two years. I am fine with kana, but kanji is just too overwhelming. My wife is Japanese so she deals with most of my daily affairs, yet that makes me feel useless. And when we meet with her family I don't understand anything anyone is saying. Immersion I think is really the best method. You will only learn so much from studying. You have to been thrown in the deep end and just figure it out. Meaning go talk with Japanese people until you start to recognize patterns and build from there.

So a genie would definitely help me learn!

 

[Ravana]

My partner and I are having heaps of fun at the moment writing a silly little thing where two characters have a newer 'capsule' as they call it, and it can do virtually anything they like. Though the kitchen keeps moving.

Currently it's showing up as a glowing tree. A 'regular' silver tree that has softly glowing blue bulbs, or seedpods.

Hee hee. There ya go. In the original series, the Master's was always in much better working order–or, at any rate, his chameleon circuit always worked.

I was 'taught' Indonesian and Spanish in primary school and just couldn't retain any of it. Though I don't think any of us did, maybe the lessons were awful. And like I said, I've been to tokyo three times (for probably six weeks in total) and I still struggle with it. I really think I'd have to live there for a year and have a job there - maybe teaching English so I'm set with people who can interpret and teach my Japanese in return, before I could make any leeway.

For a good year and a half I listened to audio - every day, missing maybe one or two days here and there, and I still only know the very basics. It's the hiragana, katakana and kanji which trip me up. I can do the basics like order food, handle accommodation, even go to a doctor and say what I'm ill with and understand how to take the medication they're giving me... but for all my years of study and hardcore attempts, I'm not fluent. At all.

I'm just incredibly awful with languages, no matter what I try. And I've tried. Oh I've tried! I think it's because we were never taught the very basics of English. My schooling - though I've only been to one for primary and middle, and one for high school - were awful and had huge gaps and blah.

Though of course it comes to me to teach myself, too, but when the primary years are lacking, it's hard to make up what you've missed.

True: like I said, it's far easier for the young to pick up languages. Children raised in bilingual environments will gain equal fluency in both languages, automatically, and do it just as rapidly as a monolingual child gains fluency in a single one. (Something for all you parents out there to keep in mind: if you have the opportunity to expose your child to a second language at an early age, do it.) For some reason, the ability to pick up new linguistic proficiency drops off rapidly for most people after a certain age–we're still not quite sure why, but the phenomenon's too well-documented to doubt at this point. And then drops off sharply again a few years later.

And yes, some people are better at picking up new languages than others. As I said, I can pick up grammatical essentials like other people pick up recalcitrant cats: they may squirm a little, but a firm grip will still get them under control. I cannot, however, achieve fluency–and I plateau rapidly when it comes to vocabulary. I'm a dilettante: I can pick up a little bit of anything (not only languages), but I rarely manage significant depth… or at least not what I consider "significant." My spouse, on the other hand–ah, screw it: my wife, for those who haven't guessed my gender by now–didn't begin studying Spanish until she was 11… and she's so fluent in it she deceives native speakers all the time: they're certain she grew up in Spain. (Specifically Spain: she uses a Castilian accent, which I have since acquired. She even deceives Spaniards, not just Latin Americans.) I'll never be half as good as she is, even if I did practice daily. On the other hand, if I did practice daily, I could reach the point where I could hold basic conversations with little difficulty: I can understand a great deal of it even now… it's production that's the problem.

And that is the problem: comprehension is far easier than production. (One of the reasons I suggested translating your own sentences: you need to be producing the language, not just hearing/reading it–even though that's vital to keep in practice too.) You may reach the point where you can understand nearly everything that's said–barring conversations involving specialized vocabulary, at least, though that's true even in your native language–and still find yourself struggling with the replies. And yes, immersion is the best way (that's why the "parachuting naked" part), and yes, two-week visits aren't long enough to really work up your competency… especially if you don't insist on speaking only Japanese during the time. And it will drop right back off once you stop using it constantly. And, again, yes, Japanese doesn't do people any favors by using multiple writing systems. For your own purposes, pick one and stick to it (to the extent it's possible to: I know they can appear mixed together) until you're comfortable with it. I know how hard it can be: I've taken Chinese. (And Sanskrit, though at least that's largely alphabetical, no matter how different the alphabet. The one I have the most problems trying to read is Arabic, even though it too is alphabetical: at least with kanji–and I assume with the other two systems–the same character doesn't change appearance depending on what's on either side of it.… )

Most people actually don't learn the "basics" of their own language–the grammar–until they do begin a second language. Which is another reason to learn one: that's where you're going to learn the actual details of your own grammar… something you acquired automatically as a child, but which you never learned to talk about. I don't know about where you are, but most American schools no longer teach English grammar at all–in fact, I know high school (that's 15-18 year old students: "secondary" for you?) teachers who have gotten in trouble for trying to teach it. It's so bad that one term, I asked my students if they knew what an "adjective" was: out of a total of 47 in two classes, 13 raised their hands. I then told them that those with their hands up had gone to small-town or private schools… and their jaws dropped and they stared at me as if I were psychic. Then I told them that those who hadn't raised their hands had gone to large-city public schools… and their jaws dropped, and they stared at me as if I were psychic.…

I had scored 100%. Every single bloody one of them. That's how bad the state of education is here–and how predictable. There ought to have been at least one outlier in nearly fifty students.… And this was college, not high school–where they had at least theoretically been required to take a second language. Which is something else for all you parents out there to keep in mind: if you want your kids to receive an education, forget sending them to a school your tax dollars are paying for. Unless you're living in a small town, at least… or a very good suburb.

Anyway: enough of the bitching… no, you aren't likely to have learned grammar in "grammar school." There is a very good series of books that might help you–both in the second language, and your own: the titles are English Grammar for Students of [X language]. It tells you what all those terms mean relative to what you already know… allowing you to relate your innate knowledge to what you're trying to learn. And they're actually well-written and easy to comprehend, too. Check 'em out.
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And now, back to your regularly-scheduled thread.…

 

[myrddin173]

1 - The ability to freeze time, or rather slow it to an imperceptible rate. I would always have plenty of time to do anything.

2 - The ability to enter, and leave, the worlds described in books.

3 - More Genies! Actually I would probably ask for a pet chinchilla, they are just so soft and fluffy!


As for the languages, I want to learn so many! I am actually waiting for my first french class in college which starts in a couple hours. I find it really interesting looking at the mechanics of languages so I wish my college had some linguistics classes. It is true I learned more about English grammar in my high school french classes than in my English classes!

 

[Dante Sawyer]

Haha, cool idea for a thread!! Anyway...
1. I become a best-selling author, not because what I write is bought for the sake of being bought, but what I write is special for the reader and actually well-written.
2. I would want to be able to read minds. I just think that'd be cool.
3. I would want myself, and my future wife and children, to live long full lives and die peacefully of natural causes.

 

[Ophiucha]

I'm pretty sure I'd be rather shallow and simple in mine, I'm afraid.

(1) Enough money to live comfortably with those dearest to me for the rest of our lives, regardless of outside forces of the economy, our occupations, or unforeseen necessities, such as medical costs.
(2) Good health for myself, with a prospect of living until I am no younger than seventy, without handicaps and with a healthy mind.
(3) Good health for my husband, with a prospect of living until he is no younger than seventy, without handicaps and with a healthy mind.

If I could combine 2 and 3, I'd probably use my third wish to meet Jorge Luis Borges.

 

[Justin Miller]

How trustworthy is this Genie, They can be tricky you know. I am going to assume he or she is fairly trustworthy, like a Fairly OddParent.
1- I would wish for my own personal House Elf named Finkle, who worked for me because he was a wish and not a slave. (That way I could dress him up in a suit and top hat and he wouldn't run away.)

2- My Second wish would be that I create something that allows me to be self sustaining financially for the rest of my life (I saw Aladdin, no bottom of the ocean for me.)

3- The third wish would be that all my family and friends lived a life of comfort and good health to the end of their days.

 

[Misusscarlet]

3 wishes from the genie hmm =\

1] Make sure my parents has all the money that they need and want so they can buy anything that they need or want.
2] For my book I want to publish to be a bestseller because people enjoy reading it.
3] I want to be immortal, and I mean immortal. Not the immortal where you can die from a head slicing. I want to see what this world will turn into, whether we spend ourselves so into debt we become a third world country, a nuclear war happens or just plain humanity goes extinct to make way for a new sentient being.

 

[mythique890]

1) Not to need sleep unless I felt like it. Late night is my only alone time, but I'm always so tired the next day.
2)To be more intelligent, but in all ways, especially academically and socially.
3) To have the work ethic and drive to be something instead of just talking about being something

 

[Hëradïn]

1. fly
2. 1,000,000 5kg platinum bars
3. peace forever

 

[Fnord]

1) My own lushly-appointed planet

2) A device that allows me to transport myself and any volume of materials from my planet to Earth

3) Immortality

 

[Dark Guardian]

1 Mind reading.
2 A pegacorn.
3 Musical talent.

 

[Hans]

I think I'd go with the standard stuff:

1) More gold than I could ever eat.
2) A beautiful and bright woman deeply in love with me. Or maybe a few of them. Of the non jealous kind.
3) A long and healthy live.

 

[Blu3 Hoovmysta]

When one can have anything, it is truly hard to decide what is most valuable. Sometimes, the simplest things are actually what we hold dearest to our hearts. With that in mind...

My first wish is to be loved, always. To know that everyone I encounter will always think highly of me, and will never negatively judge or criticize me.

Secondly, I'd like to have every material possession that I have ever wanted, and will ever want. This of course rules out the need for money. I do not need to buy any product or service if I already own it or am receiving it.

Lastly, I'd want a life full of happiness. Regardless of if it lasts for a minute, a day, or 374 and a half years, I want to be assured that all the time I have left to spend will be full of unhindered, unyielding joy.

Also, as a side note, if the genie can throw in a date with Hayley Williams from Paramore, that would be much appreciated. :-D

...but alas, one can only dream. (or wish in this case)
~Blu

 

[Wrrohk]

1. To crush my enemies.

2. To see them driven before me.

3. To hear the lamentation of their women.

 

[Helbrecht]

Call me unimaginative, but here's three things that'd improve my life substantially.

1) The time, effort and inspiration to commit myself properly to my writing, rather than just sitting around and thinking about writing. It doesn't even need to be good writing and it definitely doesn't need to be published. I'd just love to be able to practice my oft-stated and much-beloved hobby properly.
2) The ability to do as well as I do academically and at work (as in, pretty well) without stressing the hell out over it in the process. My teachers are convinced I'm very bright and my boss thinks I'm a great worker, but I only achieve this through lots of AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA on my part. Get rid of the AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA and I'd be fine.
3) A big house in the middle of nowhere for me and my girlfriend, full of books. This is where I'd like to live.

 

[S.T. Ockenner]

First Wish: That I can never go blind
Second Wish: That COVID-19 would go away
Third Wish: totally and completely infinite powers so that I can create a new universe where magic is everywhere.